The child is crying and unwilling to go to the interest class, should the parents let him stick to it?
I should be more experienced in this problem, my son is a quiet baby who does not like sports, I personally attach great importance to sports, and has enrolled my son in three sports-related interest classes, one of which is sensory integration, from 2 years old to 6 years old, the course has been brushed, one is a basketball class, my son is reluctant to go after seven or eight classes, and the last one is table tennis, the same, after four or five classes, I don't want to go.
After the basketball course is finished, I am not going to renew the class for him, but I will ask him to continue to insist on table tennis, from the process of these interest classes, as well as the discussion with the surrounding parents, I found that many children will experience such a pattern for interest classes:
I was very happy and interested in the experience class, and after taking a few courses officially, I gradually resisted and was reluctant to go, and finally I was forced to finish all the courses under the coercion and temptation of my parents.
Why is it that children who are interested in interest classes at the beginning are reluctant to go to class in the end?
There are two reasons for this phenomenon, we can support the reluctance to go for the first reason, and we need to create some more opportunities for the child to persevere.
1. If the interest class is the interest of the parents, not the children, you can give it up
Sometimes, we enroll our children in interest classes only because we want them to learn, not because they are really interested, and children will agree to go to class out of curiosity about new things, but after a few classes, they find that they don't like it, so they don't want to go.
That's why my son is reluctant to go to basketball lessons.
The reason why I want to sign up for basketball lessons for my son is because I think boys are very handsome in basketball, they can grow taller and exercise their bodies, and when I see that there are boys around me who are about the same as my son, they can go to the basket in three steps, and I am extremely envious.
So I signed up for basketball lessons for my son, but I didn't think about it, my son was not interested in basketball lessons at all, and when he saw the basketball flying over or bounced up, he was so frightened that he hurriedly hugged his head, and he didn't want to go after less than three classes.
Although I was a little angry when I saw my son who was reluctant to play basketball, I quickly became rational.
Basketball is really good, but not every boy likes to play, of course, there is also a possibility that the son is still young now, and his interest in basketball has not yet sprouted, maybe when he is a teenager, he will naturally be willing to play when he sees his friends playing basketball.
If we enroll our children in interest classes, it is our own expectations and preferences, not our children's, when our children are unwilling to attend, we can give up.
Giving up at this time is a correction of our wrong choice, not a lack of perseverance on the part of the child.
Second, if the interest class is really interesting to the child, but is unwilling to go halfway, don't give up easily
There is also a more common situation, that is, this interest class is the child himself wants to go, but he is suddenly unwilling to go halfway, at this time, we can not simply conclude that the child is three minutes hot, not serious, not hard, not persistent, blame the child: you were the first to go to class, I signed you up for the class, and now you can't say it?
The reason why children are reluctant to go to interest classes is not because they don't like it, but because of the following reasons:
1. There is a difference between a trial class and a formal course
In order to attract the interest of children, the experience class will be designed more abundantly, and the teacher is also very patient and enthusiastic, with all kinds of praise, interaction, and small gifts to make children happy and say to parents: I like this course.
Once the class is officially started, it is a different feeling, because the teacher wants parents to see the effect, the course must have progress, and it is impossible to play from beginning to end like an experience class, how happy the child is.
Dance classes, ball games and other courses start from the most basic movements, and repeating one movement is inevitably boring.
There are various competitions in courses such as Go classes and programming classes, and winning and losing are on the table.
Piano, art, etc. are also practiced from boring basic movements, and there are various examination goals to be completed.
Children are interested in interest classes just because they find it interesting and fun, and they get happiness, but after the formal curriculum begins, various goals, comparisons, requirements, and difficulties appear, and these contents are difficult to bring intuitive happiness to children.
2. The teacher is more strict and fierce
Some children are very afraid of strict, fierce teachers, and refuse to go to interest classes because they don't like teachers, which is more likely to happen in slow-burning and introverted children.
The coach of my son's basketball class is a very young coach from the sports institute, who is used to strict teaching methods, and when his son does not do good moves, he will angrily reprimand his son.
The coach is almost 1.9 meters tall, standing in front of his son with a straight face, and he does have a sense of oppression.
After two classes, my son didn't want to go anymore.
Later, I changed my son to a gentle and patient coach, and my son was willing to continue to take basketball lessons.
The coach's teaching style and personality type will greatly affect the child's acceptance of the course.
3. The child has too much frustration
There will be competitions in many interest classes, there will be teachers' comments, comparisons between classmates, these all point to the result of "winning or losing, good or bad", every child wants to win, wants to be praised by the teacher, and wants to get a certificate.
If the child always does not get these honors, he will be very frustrated, thinking that he is inferior to others and incompetent.
Since you can't do it yourself, give up.
My friend had such a situation when his child was learning Go, and he was very happy to learn at the beginning of the big class, but then he suddenly didn't want to take it, and after communicating with the teacher, he realized that the child was reluctant to go to class because he always lost to the other party in the battle.
My friend's approach is to change the big class to one-on-one teaching, let the child train alone for a period of time, improve Go skills, and then change to a big class to participate in the battle, and after the child wins a few times, he regains his self-confidence.
This reason is very common in children, who will retreat when they feel frustrated and see that others are doing better than themselves during a lesson.
4. Parents have too high expectations and pay too much attention to the results
I took my son to visit a 3-6 year old toddler race before, there was a child who was far ahead in the first half of the race, his mother held the camera next to him and cheered him on loudly, but in the second half of the race, on the last straight track, another child suddenly caught up with him, and rebounded to the finish line at the last corner, winning first place.
And the kid who was ahead of the pack won second place.
His mother lost her temper and asked the child why he didn't speed up and why he was lagging behind, and the child hung his head and listened silently to his mother's rants to himself.
Many times, parents will forget their original intention of enrolling their children in interest classes, before signing up for classes, parents' expectations are as long as the child learns happily and maintains interest.
In order to fulfill the high expectations of their parents, the child has to go to class hard, completely losing the sincere love for interest.
When a child wants to give up an interest class for the above 4 reasons, we can make adjustments first and encourage the child to take a few more classes under the adjusted plan to see if there is a change in his feelings, and maybe the child can continue to attend class.