Dude: Pru's soldiers at Bellisel

This story I heard last week in a tavern on the Montmartre heights. To tell you this story well, I may have to learn the suburban cut-out of Master Bellisel, put on his carpentry blouse, and sip two or three sips of the delicious white wine of Montmartre, which even a Maasai can speak with a Parisian accent. I dare say that this will surely make your heart jump as I am, for that's how Master Bellisell felt when he told this sad and true story to his companions sitting around the table.

“...... It was the day after the amnesty (actually Beliser was talking about a 'truce'). My wife sent me and my children to Villeneuve-la-Galene[1] for a walk, because we had a wooden house there by the water, which we had not heard of since the siege of Paris. Bringing kids worries me a lot. I knew we were going to run into the Prussians, because I hadn't met them yet, so I was very afraid of what would happen. However, the child's mother insisted that I do this:

"'Go, go, go, let the boy breathe. ’

"Indeed, after five months of siege and musty smell, this poor child needs to go out and get some air!

So we both walked through the fields and went on the road. The children saw that the trees and birds were still there, and they were digging for water in the ploughed fields. I don't know if he's happy, but I'm not in that good spirits, and there's a helmet of spiked steel all over the way. From the canal to the island, all I saw were Prussian soldiers, and they were very arrogant and impudent! If I hadn't endured them, I would have gone up and beaten them up a long time ago. But what really angered me was when I entered Villeneuf and saw that our wretched gardens were in ruins, with all the doors wide open and the houses looted, and all these robbers living in our homes, shouting from one window to another, and hanging our woollen sweaters on our blinds or fences. Luckily, the kid walked by me, and whenever I had an itch in my fist, I looked at him and thought, 'You're too impulsive, Belisel...... Be careful not to let anything happen to your child. Only this kid could stop me from doing stupid things. Then I understood why the child's mother insisted that I take him with me.

"Our wooden house was on the embankment at the end of the town, the last one on the right. I saw that it was also ransacked from top to bottom, just like the rest of the house. Not a piece of furniture, not a piece of glass. All that remained was a few straw boots and the last foot of the large armchair, crackling in the fireplace. You can smell the Prussians everywhere, but you can't see them...... Still, I felt like something was shaking in the cellar. There's one of my little workbenches there, where I like to do some tinkering on Sundays. I asked the child to wait for me outside and go down to see what was going on.

"Almost at the same time the door of the cellar opened, and a tall soldier of King Guillaume[2] drunkenly straightened up from the shavings, and threw himself at me with a howl, his eyes bulging, and his mouth uttering a great deal of swear which I did not understand. The beast must have been in a bad mood when he woke up, for he began to draw his saber before I could say the first word......

At this moment, the blood all over my body also gushed up. The anger that had been building up for an hour burned to his face at once...... I grabbed the clip from the workbench and slammed it at him...... Friends, did you know that Bellisell's wrist was as strong as usual, and that day, my arm seemed to have the power of a thunderbolt...... I only struck once, and the Prussian stopped showing his teeth and claws, and he fell straight down. I thought he just fainted. Yes...... I killed him, boys, and I did a great job. It's just neat!

"I've never killed anyone in my life, not even a lark, and it's funny to look at this burly body in front of me...... Truth be told, he was a handsome blonde lad with a newly grown beard curly like shavings of Cen wood. I looked at him, my legs shaking. Then the boy was waiting impatiently, and I heard him shout with all his might:

"'Daddy!'

"There were Prussians walking on the road, and their sabers and thick calves could be seen through the air windows of the cellars. I suddenly thought, 'If they come in, the kid will be finished...... They're going to slaughter us all. The thought flashed through me, and I no longer trembled. I quickly pushed the Prussian under the workbench, piled all the planks, shavings, and sawdust I could find on him, and went up to look for my children.

"'I'm coming......

"'What's wrong with you, Dad, why are you so pale......'

"'Let's go, let's go. ’

"I assure you that I will not resist even if the Prussian soldiers, who were as savage as the Cossacks, pushed me and squinted at me. I always felt that someone was running and shouting behind us, and once I heard a horse running towards us so fast that I was about to fall to the ground. However, after crossing those bridges, I began to calm down. Saint-Denis[3] was full of people, and we were not in danger of being caught in the crowd. That's when I thought of our poor wooden house. If the Prussians found their companions, they would take revenge and set fire to the huts, and my neighbor Jacob, who was a fisherman, the only Frenchman left in the town, and the soldier who was killed near his house would certainly cause him trouble. Seriously, running away like this is really not a hero.

"I should at least find a way to dispose of the body...... The closer we got to Paris, the more this thought bothered me. No, I don't feel comfortable leaving this Prussian in the cellar. So, when we came to the walls of Paris, I couldn't help it anymore:

"'Go back first,' I said to the boy. I'm going to Saint-Denis to do something. ’

With that, I kissed him and walked back. My heart was beating a little fast, but it didn't matter, I felt relaxed when the child wasn't around.

"When I returned to Villeneuve, it was starting to get dark. As you can imagine: my eyes are wide open, and I can only move forward one step at a time. However, the town seems to be calm. I saw that the hut was still there, shrouded in twilight. There was a long black fence on the embankment, which was named by the Prussians. It's a good opportunity, and there's certainly no one in the house. I walked along the fence and saw Daddy Jacob drying a net cover for fishing in the yard. Obviously, no one knows about this yet...... I entered the hut and groped my way down the cellar. The Prussian man was still lying under the shavings, and there were even two huge rats gnawing at his steel helmet. I could feel the steel helmet's chin moving, and it made me both proud and terrified. For a moment, I thought the corpse was about to come back to life...... No! His head was heavy and cold. I hid in a corner and waited, intending to throw the body into the Seine after everyone else had fallen asleep......

"I don't know if it was because of the sitting on the side of the dead, but the Prussians' homecoming seemed particularly bleak that night. The loud trumpet sounded in a group of three: tick-tick - exactly the same sound as the sound made by a toad. Those Prussian soldiers would not have fallen asleep to the sound of such a bugle......

"For five minutes I heard the sound of a saber dragging on the ground and a knock on the door, and then a soldier entered the courtyard and began to shout:

"'Hoffman!'

"Poor Hoffman is lying quietly under the shavings...... I'm the one who made myself old...... I waited every moment for them to walk into the cellar. I picked up the dead man's saber and remained motionless, silently saying to myself: 'My little old man...... If you can escape this today, you should go to the church of Bellavier[4] and light a large candle for the statue of St. Baptiste......

"But my tenants had enough of Hoffman shouting and finally decided to go home. I heard their heavy boots on the stairs, and after a while the whole hut was snoring like a village bell. All I was waiting for was this moment, finally being able to get out.

"The banks of the river were empty, and the lights of all the houses were out. Great. I quickly returned to the cellar, dragged Hoffman out from under the workbench, erected him upright, and carried him on my shoulders like a porter carrying a shelf...... This robber is really heavy...... I felt scared, plus my stomach had been empty since morning...... I don't think I'll ever have the strength to carry him to the river. Then, when I came to the middle of the embankment, I felt someone walking behind me. I turned around and there was no one...... It turned out that the moon had risen. I said to myself, 'Be careful, wait a little longer...... The sentries will shoot. ’

"The most unfortunate thing is that the water level of the Seine is very low. If I threw him at the water's edge, he would stay there as he did by the washbasin...... I walked into the riverbed and moved on...... There is still no water...... I couldn't hold on any longer: the joints all over my body felt like they were stuck...... Eventually, I decided I had gone far enough, so I let the guy go...... Go for a walk, but the corpse is stuck in the mire, and there is no way to make it move. I'm pushing, pushing...... Fortunately, the east wind blew and the Seine became turbulent. I felt the corpse slowly set sail. I choked on a mouthful of water and quickly returned to shore.

"When I crossed the Pont de la Villeneuve again, I saw something black in the middle of the Seine. From a distance, it looks like a flat-bottomed boat. It was my Prussians drifting down the river in the direction of Argenteuil[5]. ”

Notes

[1] The name of the town, located near Nanterre, in the Hautes-Seine department, northwest of Paris.

[2] Guillaume I (1797-1888), King of Prussia (1861-1888), was crowned Emperor of Germany after the Franco-Prussian War in 1871.

[3] The name of a suburb in northern Paris.

[4] A neighborhood in Paris.

[5] A small town on the banks of the Seine in the northern suburbs of Paris.

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