In many seemingly simple things, the child knows very well in his heart, but when he does it, it backfires, no matter how you shout and wear out his mouth, he still does his own thing. Parents with a strong temperament will yell at their children, nothing more than "If you don't obey again, I won't buy you candy to eat!" "Why are you grinding and chirping, hurry, hurry!" "You can't do such a thing, it's really stupid, what else can you do!" "Your casual whining may seem like nothing to you, but to your children the taste has completely changed, and they will think that you are threatening them. Slowly, children will develop a rebellious mentality, and some children will even be estranged from their mothers because they are too introverted.
Xiaoxi, who has always studied very well, did not do well in an exam, and his mother was very annoyed when she saw his results: "I know how to play all day long, and it's strange to be able to do well in the exam!" Looking at the indifferent Xiaoxi, he intensified and said: "From today onwards, after finishing homework every day, you are not allowed to watch cartoons anymore, and you can take a good look at extracurricular books." Xiaoxi didn't want to argue with her mother, but after hearing her mother say that she was not allowed to watch cartoons, she couldn't control her emotions, and he said to her mother: "Why don't you let me watch cartoons?" I just accidentally answered a question incorrectly, does it mean that I haven't studied hard?" Mom was even more angry when she heard Xiaoxi's rebuttal, she didn't expect Xiaoxi to contradict herself. Mom yelled: "You didn't do well in the exam, are you reasonable? Still talking to my mother like this, I said that if I don't want to watch cartoons, I won't let you watch them. Hurry up and read me a book!" he said, hiding the TV remote control. Xiaoxi couldn't say anything about her mother, so she had to go back to the house and cry aggrieved.
If the test score is not good, the child itself will also be very uncomfortable, especially some children with strong self-esteem, who may have been complaining about themselves for a long time. At this time, the mother not only did not comfort the child, and the child looked for the reason together, but also inexplicably yelled, counted and even threatened the child, which will only increase the communication barrier between herself and the child, and will not have any positive effect on solving the problem, and the mother's approach is very unwise and very incompetent.
Yueyue is a sloppy and careless child, and her mother is very angry about it, but she knows that the more she reprimands the child, the more the child is not serious. Mom decided to solve this problem with Yueyue. Once, after Yueyue finished her homework, she handed over the homework to her mother, and her mother read it carefully and said to Yueyue: "Today's homework is good, although I made a few wrong questions, but the handwriting is very clear." After listening to her mother's words, Yueyue wanted to get her mother's affirmation very much: "Mom, I was a little tired just now, check the math homework again, and I will take a break and rewrite the scribbled part." My mother said happily, "Take a break when you feel tired while doing your homework, and I think you will be praised by the teacher for your serious homework." After finishing the homework, we went to watch the cartoon together. Yueyue happily accepted her mother's advice and completed her homework seriously.
In the same face of the child's learning problems, the mother used a communication method to affirm that the child maintained the child's self-esteem, and also let the child overcomplete the homework, killing two birds with one stone. The purpose of educating children is to make children understand things and help them understand what they should do and how to make things work for the better. It's not that the child is really disobedient, but the mother feels that the child is disobedient, and the more the child doesn't listen to you, the more he yells, the more he yells, the more he doesn't listen, forming a vicious circle between you and the child. It is not difficult to see that temporarily suppressing children's education is ineffective, and threatening to correct children with yelling is also self-deception, and it is also the most incompetent performance of mothers. When mothers educate their children, they must pay attention to the way they talk to their children and choose a good angle to solve the problem. Roaring threats can only make children more rebellious, and behind the rebellion is the child's potential psychological problems, as long as you don't touch it, it will not get worse, so control your emotions and don't yell at your child, be a competent mother!