01.
A few days ago, Hao Shaowen's wife Lin Ningrui posted:
My 8-year-old daughter was bullied at school and often woke up crying from nightmares.
In order to protect his daughter, Lin Ningrui practiced "anti-bullying" with the child at home, and let the child go to school as usual, but was hurt by the school for the second time.
Before the case was investigated, the school had taken action to instill the wrong idea in the child, telling the child that it was just a little game between friends.
Lin Ningrui didn't understand, could the interests of the school really take precedence over the physical and mental health of the child? Isn't this kind of handling of mud and mud promoting bullying?
Like most parents, Lin Ningrui never thought that his child would be bullied, let alone hurt by the school for the second time. We all think that bullying is far away from our children, but we don't realize that it is probably right around us.
Not long after Lin Ningrui posted, Hao Shaowen also posted a video response. In the video, Hao Shaowen mentioned: It is not a matter of one or two days for children to be bullied. For this matter, he has to go back and forth frequently to deal with it, and at the same time, he has to be busy with work.
He also said:
"I want to take on the responsibility of a father, and I want my daughter to know that no matter how the world changes, I will still be your most stable backer behind you, to protect you from the wind and rain. ”
"I believe that there is justice in this world, and I will do my best to protect my family, my wife, and my children. ”
Although the video is not long, in the whole video, Hao Shaowen's expression is very sad, and it can be seen that he is really distressed that his daughter has suffered such a thing. Especially his sentence "I will be the most stable backer behind my daughter" is really moving.
The most touching thing is that this 8-year-old daughter is not Hao Shaowen's biological daughter, but a stepdaughter.
For a child who is not related by blood, it is not easy for Hao Shaowen to accompany and raise him, and it is even more commendable to feel so sincerely sorry for his daughter and run back and forth for the child's affairs after busy work.
02.
For a long time, the way Hao Shaowen and his stepdaughter get along has attracted public attention.
The last time it was on the hot search, it was because at the wedding, Hao Shaowen kissed his stepdaughter mouth-to-mouth.
At that time, after the photo was exposed, many netizens said that they couldn't accept it, called it "spicy eyes", and said that the feelings had changed.
Later, in a vlog, Hao Shaowen put his hand into his stepdaughter's sleeve and repeatedly touched her arm, which also made netizens feel "physiologically uncomfortable".
Indeed, Hao Shaowen was indeed out of proportion when dealing with his relationship with his daughter. But we can't deny that his love for children is indeed sincere.
In a reality show, the first thing her stepdaughter does when she gets up in the morning is to find Hao Shaowen first, and she will naturally kneel on Hao Shaowen's stomach and interact with him.
Although Hao Shaowen was so sleepy that he couldn't open his eyes, he still smiled and held the child's hand, and the whole picture was quite warm and loving.
Then, the stepdaughter kept coquettishly asking Hao Shaowen to get up, and said, "I'm hungry, waiting for my dad to cook for me." ”
Hao Shaowen didn't say anything, got up immediately, and made a table of delicious breakfast for his daughter.
In the process of cooking, Hao Shaowen did not forget to interact with his stepdaughter, and her daughter wanted to experience cooking, so Hao Shaowen helped her prepare the ingredients for stir-frying.
In the process of the child's experience, Hao Shaowen kept praising her, saying that she was great and capable.
This wave of emotional value is simply full, and I'm afraid that many biological parents can't be so patient.
When he sleeps at night, Hao Shaowen will also tell stories to his daughter. After her daughter fell asleep listening to the story, Hao Shaowen kissed her on the cheek very naturally, and then left quietly.
This spoiling that overflows the screen is really enviable.
In ordinary life, Hao Shaowen also accompanies his daughter a lot.
He would go to his daughter's performance with his wife and applaud and cheer for her wonderful performance.
He will also try to correct his daughter in a calm tone when she makes a mistake, and even if the child is disobedient, he can also restrain his emotions and not lose his temper at will.
His daughter likes purple, so he will replace her bedding and knick-knacks with purple, and even without bothering, he will repaint the original brown bookshelf in his stepdaughter's room to purple.
What's even more touching is that Hao Shaowen's love for his daughter is unrequited. Although he and Lin Ningrui have been married for a while, he never mentioned that he wanted to change his stepdaughter's surname, even if outsiders ridiculed him for "raising children for others" and "liking to be a father", he didn't care.
When someone asks him: When you have a child in the future, will you still be good to your stepdaughter?
Hao Shaowen replied with a smile: "A bowl of water is flat, for me, it can be done, children are very sensitive, it is impossible to take care of one in every way, ignore the other, whether a person is really good to her, she can feel it." ”
Hao Shaowen is right, children are the purest, whoever is good to her, she likes whomever she likes. Adults may disguise, but children don't lie.
Just from the fact that her daughter looked for Hao Shaowen first thing when she got up, it can be seen that she recognizes and trusts Hao Shaowen. Although he is not his biological father, his long-term and attentive companionship has long made each other's family affection transcend blood relations.
03.
From Hao Shaowen's relationship with his stepdaughter, it is not difficult for us to find that he truly regards his stepdaughter as his own.
Such a precious daughter was bullied by her classmates at school, and she had nightmares and even woke up crying every night, which made any father feel uneasy.
What is even more unacceptable is that the "Wycombe Abbey Experimental School" where Hao Shaowen's daughter is located is not an ordinary school, and its tuition fees are simply amazing.
It is rumored that Wycombe Abbey Experimental Primary School ranks third in the ranking of the most expensive primary schools in Hangzhou, with an annual tuition fee of 1.14 million yuan.
Poverty limits my imagination!
However, in another report, the cost of the Wycombe Abbey Experimental Primary School is 200,000 yuan per year. But whether it is 200,000 or 1.14 million, it is a price that ordinary working families cannot afford.
The school charges high tuition fees, but it can't even protect the most basic physical and mental health of children, and even chooses to treat it coldly after the school bullying incident, which is really unreasonable, and it is no wonder that Lin Ningrui will post that he was deceived by the propaganda of Wycombe Abbey Primary School.
And this also gives the public a new understanding of school bullying: I thought that bullying would only happen to ordinary schools and ordinary children, but I didn't expect that even high-quality schools and celebrity children could not escape the claws of school bullying.
In fact, Hao Shaowen's daughter is not the first celebrity child to be bullied, as early as two years ago, Qin Hao's crying incident because his daughter was bullied also appeared on Weibo hot search.
Mi Li, who was 4 years old at the time, had just arrived at the new school, only to find that her classmates had isolated her, and a boy had bullied her a lot.
When talking about this matter, Qin Hao was still out of control for a while, and he cried several times, he shook his head helplessly and asked:
"When you have a child who is always bullied at school, and you talk to teachers and parents, but you are still bullied, what do you do?"
A simple sentence pokes at the pain points in the hearts of countless parents: Yes, children are bullied, parents have communicated with what they should have communicated, and dealt with what they should have dealt with, but children are still bullied, what can parents do? Do they really go to school to beat the bully?
Regarding this problem, Dumb Dad feels that the approach of Hao Shaowen and his wife is worth learning from.
After the incident, Hao Shaowen and his wife trusted the child unconditionally, and did not question the child's "why don't you bully others, just bully you", especially Hao Shaowen's statement "to be the most solid backing for the child", which gave the child a full sense of security.
Then, Lin Ningrui practiced "anti-bullying" with the child at home, taught the child how to protect himself, and encouraged the child to face it bravely. At the same time, she also actively contacted the school to understand the specific situation, and hoped that the school and teachers could cooperate in dealing with it.
When repeated communication was fruitless and the school and mud were discovered, Hao Shaowen and his wife did not swallow their anger, but decided to make the incident public and use the power of public opinion to exert pressure on the school.
Of course, as ordinary people, we don't have a "star effect" like Hao Shaowen, so as parents, we can also find justice for our children in another way through legal means.
It is worth noting that in Lin Ningrui's post, she also mentioned that she never thought that her daughter would be bullied, and she also blamed herself for not noticing the child's abnormal mood and behavior at the beginning. And this is also a problem that parents tend to ignore.
Many children are reluctant or afraid to mention it to their parents when they are bullied, which requires parents to have a pair of eyes that are kind to discover, and if they find that their children are behaving abnormally, they should be highly vigilant.
For example, when taking a bath, we can see if there are any unexplained injuries on the child's body.
For example, whether the child's pocket money will be lost for no reason, or whether the parent will frequently ask for money.
Another example is whether the child's emotions will be abnormal, such as silence, loss, irritability, irritability, nightmares, crying for no reason, etc., or whether the child will not want to go to school, reject socializing with classmates, etc. If there is, then parents should communicate with their children in a timely manner, and if necessary, they can contact the school teachers to ask about their children's school situation.
In short, as Professor Li Meijin, an expert in juvenile criminal psychology, said:
"Children can't bully others, it's a matter of parenting. Preventing children from being bullied is also an issue for parents to teach. ”
As parents, we have a responsibility to protect our children, and we have a responsibility to teach them how to protect themselves. We want to be heroes to our children, not heroes.