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My name is Lin Wan'er, I am 30 years old, and my family lives in the corner of a small county town. Originally, my world consisted only of my husband Xiaojie and my newborn son Xiaobao. But since I had a massive postpartum hemorrhage, everything has changed. When I woke up, I just felt like my body was empty, as if all my strength had been drained. Xiao Jie's face was pale, and his eyes were full of impatience.
"Why are you so unlucky, Lin Wan'er!" his voice echoed in the hospital room.
I stared at him blankly, my lips dry, and I tried to speak but could only make a faint sound. I could feel Jay's displeasure with me, but I really did my best.
My mother-in-law, a standard traditional Chinese woman, sat on the edge of the bed with a worried expression on her face. "Xiaojie, don't say that about your wife, she has just given birth. ”
Xiaojie was unmoved, "Mom, don't help her speak." Now it's okay, and you have to spend a lot of money on medical expenses. ”
I closed my eyes and didn't want to see their arguments. My heart was filled with disappointment. Xiaojie and I have been married for five years, and he has always been a good man for the family, but since I became pregnant, he has become restless and often lashes out over small things.
"Wan'er, are you awake?" my mom asked softly, her voice full of concern.
I opened my eyes and saw my mother standing at the head of the bed, her eyes slightly red. I nodded, but couldn't speak. My mom is a gentle person and she has hardly ever left my bedside since I was hospitalized.
At this moment, Xiaojie's phone rang. He picked up the phone, a subtle hint of guilt on his face. "Okay, I'll go over it. He hurriedly hung up the phone and said to us, "I have something to do, so let's go first." ”
The mother-in-law looked at his back and sighed softly, "This child, since marrying Wan'er, has not had a stable life." ”
My mother touched my hand, "Wan'er, don't think too much, take care of your body." ”
At night, the hospital is exceptionally quiet. I lay in bed with a lot of thoughts. I began to think back to my past with Xiaojie, when he was so gentle and considerate.
Suddenly, the door was pushed open with a "clang", and it was Xiaojie who came back. But his face was very bad.
"Xiaojie, what's wrong with you?" I asked worriedly.
He looked at me coldly, "Do you know where I just went? I went to meet an important client, and because of you, I almost missed it." ”
I was speechless and didn't know how to respond.
"I'll tell you, Lin Wan'er, you'd better get better quickly, and don't trouble me anymore. With that, he angrily left the room.
I clutched the quilt tightly, tears streaming down
Stopped flowing. I felt powerlessness and despair that I had never felt before. In this cold hospital room, I felt like I had been abandoned by the whole world.
The next day, my friend Xiaomei came to see me. Xiaomei is my roommate in college and has always cared about me.
"Wan'er, you look much better. Xiaomei's voice was full of concern.
I forced a smile, "yes, much better." ”
Xiaomei sat on the edge of my bed and asked cautiously, "I heard that Xiaojie was in a bad mood when he came back last night, did anything happen?"
I shook my head, not wanting to talk about last night. "It's nothing, he's probably a little stressed at work. ”
"Wan'er, if there's anything you need help with, you must tell me. Xiaomei held my hand tightly.
We talked a lot about interesting things about her college days, about Xiaomei's job, and some interesting things she had recently encountered. With Xiaomei by my side, I feel a lot better.
However, when Xiaojie returned to the ward that night, the atmosphere became tense again. His brow furrowed, as if he had endless troubles.
I tried to lighten the mood, "Xiaojie, how is your work today?"
He replied coldly, "Generally." Then there was silence.
At this time, my phone rang, and it was a message from work. Because I was sick, my job was temporarily replaced by someone else. I felt a sense of loss that I had been doing my job well, but now I had to leave temporarily because of my illness.
Xiaojie glanced at my phone and suddenly said angrily, "Look, you can't even keep your job!"
I was stunned, I didn't expect Xiaojie to blame me for this. All of a sudden, my mood hit rock bottom.
"Xiaojie, I don't want to......" I argued.
"Don't you know, all the burden at home is on me now!" Xiaojie's voice grew louder and louder.
I didn't know how to respond, so I cried silently.
In the next few days, Xiaojie barely came to the hospital again. Every day it was my mom and mother-in-law who took turns taking care of me. Even though they were very concerned about me, I could feel that the atmosphere between them had become a little awkward.
One night, my mother-in-law came to take care of me, and there was an indescribable melancholy in her eyes.
"Wan'er, is there any conflict between you and Xiaojie?" asked the mother-in-law cautiously.
I shook my head, "No, mother-in-law, it may be that I'm not in good health and I'm worried." ”
The mother-in-law sighed, "I know Xiaojie has a bad temper, but he is a man after all, and there is a lot of pressure outside." Be considerate of him. ”
I didn't know what to say, I just listened quietly.
That night, I tossed and turned, in my heart
Full of doubts and uneasiness. I began to wonder if our marriage was really just so fragile because of my illness, and I felt a deep sense of powerlessness and confusion.
The next day, my college classmate Kobayashi came to visit me. Kobayashi is a cheerful boy, and we had a good relationship when we were in college. He brought some fruit and books in the hope that I would not be so bored in the hospital.
"Wan'er, I heard that you were sick, so I came to see you. Kobayashi's voice was full of concern.
We talked a lot, and he talked about his recent work and life, which made me feel relaxed and happy for a long time. With him by my side, I forgot about my illness and troubles for a while.
But the good times didn't last long, Xiaojie suddenly came to visit, and when he saw Xiaolin there, his face immediately became ugly.
"Who are you?" said Xiaojie's tone with obvious hostility.
Xiao Lin stood up and said politely, "I'm Wan'er's college classmate, Xiao Lin." ”
A hint of displeasure flashed in Xiao Jie's eyes, and he turned to me, "Are you sick like this, and are you still in the mood to chat with other men?"
I felt very embarrassed and helpless, "Xiaojie, he's just my classmate. ”
Xiao Lin also felt the embarrassment of the atmosphere, "I'll go first, Wan'er, you have to rest well." ”
After Xiao Lin left, Xiao Jie's face became even more gloomy. "You're a sick person now, and you're not recuperating well, and you're thinking about all kinds of nonsense all day long. ”
I felt very aggrieved, but I didn't know how to refute it. Xiaojie's suspicions and accusations made me feel extremely depressed and painful.
That night, Xiaojie did not come to the hospital again. I lay alone in my hospital bed, tears streaming down my face. I miss our old days, when Xiaojie was so gentle and considerate, and our lives were plain but full of happiness and sweetness. Now, everything has changed, and I don't know if our marriage will ever go back to what it used to be.
After a few days, I was finally able to be discharged from the hospital. My mom and mother-in-law both came to pick me up. Back at home, I felt a warmth and peace that I hadn't felt in a long time. But Xiaojie's attitude is still cold, he hardly talks to me, and he is busy with work all day.
One night, I stumbled upon a message from a strange woman on Xiaojie's phone. "Xiaojie, are you free tomorrow night? "I felt a shock in my heart and felt an inexplicable panic.
I didn't ask Xiaojie, just silently put the phone back in its place. At that moment, I felt a deep sense of loss and helplessness. I began to wonder if our marriage had come to an end.
A few days later, Xiaojie suddenly offered to talk to me. His expression was serious, and I felt a sense of foreboding.
"Wan'er, we
Need to talk about it. Xiao Jie's voice was calm but resolute.
I didn't know what he was going to say, but my gut told me it wasn't going to be a pleasant conversation.
"Regarding our marriage, I feel like we need to reconsider. Xiao Jie avoided my eyes, and his tone revealed distancing.
I felt a wave of dizziness, "You mean, divorce?" and my voice almost trembled.
Xiaojie was silent for a moment, then nodded slowly. "I don't feel like we used to feel that way we used to. As you can see, I'm under a lot of pressure right now, we fight a lot, and it's not good for us to go on like this. ”
I felt a deep sense of despair, "But, we still have Xiaobao, how can you..."
"Of course I will be responsible, and I will give you mother and son living expenses. Xiaobao, I will also come to see it often. Xiao Jie's voice sounded a little unforgiving.
I can hardly believe that this is the gentle little jie I used to be. I felt a deep sense of betrayal and pain, but at the same time a sense of relief. Perhaps, this is the end of our marriage.
That night, I barely closed my eyes. I think a lot, about our past, about the future. I know that no matter how reluctant I am, I have to accept this reality.
The next day, I went to a lawyer to consult about the divorce. The lawyer was very professional and gave me a lot of useful advice. When I left the law firm, although my heart was heavy, there was also an inexplicable lightness. At the very least, I know what I need to do and know that I have to work hard for my future and that of Xiaobao.
When I got home, I started to organize my things. I decided to move back to my mom's house, where at least I could have the support and comfort of my family.
When Xiaojie came back that night, he saw that I was packing my things, and his expression was a little stunned. "You are..."
"I decided to move back to my mom's house. I tried to keep my voice as calm as possible, "I've already consulted a lawyer about divorce." ”
Xiaojie was silent for a while, and then said slowly: "Maybe this is good for us." ”
And just like that, our marriage came to an end. I moved back to my mother's house with Xiaobao. Although my heart was full of reluctance and pain, I knew that life had to go on.
During my days at my mother's house, I slowly began to regain some calm. Xiaobao's smiling face is my greatest comfort. Mom and I love this little life very much, and we try not to make him feel the impact of family changes.
I also started to rethink my future. I decided to get a job first and settle down. At the same time, I also signed up for some interest classes, hoping to enrich my life by learning Xi new skills and lay a foundation for my future development.
In the process, I met very
How difficult and challenging, but I didn't give up. I know that as a single mother, I am not only responsible for myself, but also for Xiaobao. My life is ordinary, but every step is full of determination and courage.
In the process of looking for a job, I unexpectedly met my university mentor, Professor Zhang. When Professor Zhang learned about my situation, he was very concerned. He had friends at a well-known company who recommended me for a position. After several rounds of interviews, I was able to get the job without a hitch. Not only does this job pay well, but the working environment is also very good, and I am very fortunate to have it.
Outside of work, I didn't give up my interests. I took part in writing classes and photography classes in the hope that these activities would enrich my spare time. In the writing class, I met a group of like-minded friends. We encouraged each other to share our stories and experiences, and I found the joy and passion for writing in the process.
In the photography class, I learned how to capture the beautiful moments in life with my lens. Whenever I pick up my camera, I forget about the troubles of life and focus only on the beautiful scenery in front of me. Photography became a way for me to release my stress and also taught me to observe and appreciate life from a different perspective.
Xiaobao also gradually grew up and became a lively and lovely child. I try to fill his life with love and joy and not let him feel the shadow of his parents' divorce. Whenever I see his carefree smiling face, I feel that all the hard work is worth it.
My relationship with Xiaojie has also improved. Although we are divorced, we both try to maintain good communication for the sake of Xiaobao. Xiaojie also gradually realized his past mistakes and began to participate more actively in Xiaobao's life. Although we are no longer husband and wife, we are both Xiaobao's parents, and this will never change.
As time went by, my life gradually got back on track. My work, my hobbies, my family, I feel fulfilled and happy. Although my life is no longer as peaceful as it used to be, I am stronger and more independent now.
I also started to write my own stories, hoping to share my experiences and insights through words. I believe that everyone who has experienced setbacks and pain can find their own light in the darkness.
My story continues, and every day is a new beginning. I don't know what the future holds, but I know that as long as I persevere, I will be able to get out of my wonderful life.
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