The news of "a girl in the mountains came to her period to write a suicide note" made my heart sour.
A reporter visited the donation project for girls in mountainous areas that he had participated in.
Among the children in the mountainous areas, there are many left-behind children.
During the interview, there was a very poignant scene.
A fifth-grade mountain girl has her first menstrual period.
This is a process that a woman must go through in her life, which means that it should be a joyful thing to slowly move from childishness to maturity.
But the child almost collapsed.
Her parents worked in other places all the year round, and no one had ever taught her about it.
She didn't know what was wrong with her, why was it bleeding?
The girl thought that she was seriously ill and was about to die.
So, she wrote a suicide note.
And when it was learned from the teacher that this was a normal physiological phenomenon, the girl said something like this:
When I have a baby, I must tell her in advance. Don't let her panic at times like I did.
This news makes me sad and heartbroken.
Other girls can ask their mothers, what's wrong with them?
But her mother, who is far away in a big city, can't respond in time.
She didn't know what it was or how to deal with it.
Fear, sadness, shame, all kinds of emotions almost overwhelmed her.
That suicide note is her farewell to the world, and it is also the most helpless reality.
In fact, it is hard for me to imagine how worried and self-blamed the child's mother will be when she finds out.
When the child is facing a new stage of life, she can't even give a hug when she needs her mother the most.
This story is just a microcosm of countless left-behind children.
In the vast land of China, there are too many such children, enduring longing and loneliness, and growing up in stumbles.
A video swiped the whole network before.
A little girl over 1 year old accidentally fell in front of the steps of her house.
She was carrying a delicate little school bag, but she was tripped and unable to stand up.
After struggling for a while, she shouted at the monitor, "Daddy, I can't stand up."
And her father, who is far away in the city at the moment, is struggling for the family's livelihood.
This "Dad" completely crushed his heart.
After seeing the video, I felt uncomfortable all afternoon, and I couldn't wait to rush back immediately.
But the only thing he can do now is to look at his daughter on the screen and say "I'm sorry" a thousand or ten thousand times in his heart.
Yunfu, Guangdong, a 4-year-old girl, was scalded by boiling water.
She cried heartbreakingly, shaking her hands and stomping her feet in place.
Her parents weren't around, and she cried for an hour.
At that moment, how helpless was she in her heart?
The hot pain in her hands, the loss in her heart, swept towards her.
In her heart, perhaps the thought of this rose countless times:
If only Mom were here, if Mom was there, it wouldn't be like this.
However, who misses his mother, why is there more than one person?
When Children's Day comes, other children are accompanied by their mothers, but the little boy's mother is not around.
There is a mother painted on the ground, and he is lying in the arms of the mother painted on the ground, as if his mother is holding him.
Even if the child is young, he knows that only his parents are irreplaceable.
A 2-year-old kid heard that his parents were coming home today and waited at the intersection for 3 hours.
He couldn't tell what he was missing, but he just wanted to look at the intersection over and over again.
The car carrying my parents drove in front of me, and the gentle faces that appeared countless times in my sleep were really close at hand.
But he didn't dare to recognize each other, nor did he dare to be ecstatic, if it was another dream, he would rather wake up later.
Knowing that his parents were going home, the child, who usually goes to bed early, waited until 3 o'clock in the morning.
Before the voices of their parents entered the door, they had already rushed out of the door and ran to their parents.
This is a moment he has been waiting for for a whole year.
They may not understand why their parents are in a hurry to leave every time they come back for a few days.
But they know that this time to leave, the next time they meet, it may be another year.
I watched a video of a left-behind girl returning from school and missing her mother.
She stood in front of the surveillance and shouted: Mom, look at the surveillance.
But no matter how many times she shouted, there was no response from her mother in the surveillance.
The child's voice gradually carried a crying, longing, loneliness, constantly devouring her.
She turned around and called for the smart device at home, but after calling several times, there was still no response.
At that moment, her broken cry made my heart tug.
She didn't know why other classmates could be with her mother.
I don't know why my mother is so reluctant to respond to herself.
The huge schoolbag pressed her body back, but she still didn't have time to miss it, and she slid into the emotional abyss.
No amount of new clothes, no amount of delicious snacks, can resist the invasion of longing.
I have made a little progress in my school Xi, and I can't share it with my parents for the first time.
The interesting stories encountered on the way out of school can't be told to their parents in person like pouring beans from a bamboo tube.
Those futures that make a lot of money, go to college, and are full of flowers are as far away as stars in the sky.
The only thing they can feel is that they are always alone when they need their parents' love the most.
There is a question on Zhihu: What is the most poignant scene you have ever seen?
The highest praise is only one image, without any text.
Parents who go to distant places in the car, reluctant children, and helpless elderly people constitute too many Chinese families and staged pictures every year.
The mother went out to work, and the 1-year-old child chased after the mother's car and chased to the entrance of the village.
In the car, it was the mother who gritted her teeth and didn't get out of the car, but said with a crying voice: You drive slowly.
Outside the car, there was a child crying heartbreakingly.
He didn't know why his mother was leaving, thinking that with his arms outstretched, his mother would still be able to catch him like before.
However, the car got farther and farther away, and my mother never got out of the car.
After every brief reunion, the separation is always extremely painful.
Knowing that his mother was going out to work, the child cried heartbreakingly: I don't want money, I just want my mother.
Grandma enlightened on the side: Then if you want to play this and that, you need money to buy it.
The child hugged his mother and didn't let go: then I won't play next time, and I won't play in the future.
He doesn't want any toys anymore, just his mother.
Who can not be moved.
For them, the pain of parting will not gradually fade with the increase of the number of times.
Just like a wound, every time it scabs, then tears it open, and then scabs it over, it hurts the same.
There was once a child named Zhao Zihan, who wrote a letter to her father who worked outside all the year round, and countless people cried.
The gift she wants most is to meet her father.
She said:
The moment you left, I cried, and I didn't want you to see me crying, so I ran into the house alone and cried in grief.
You've always told me to study hard Xi, but now that the certificate is plastered all over the wall, you still haven't come back...
In the childhood of left-behind children, they are forced to learn to say goodbye to Xi.
The lack of father's love and mother's love makes them sensible, sensitive, and inferior prematurely.
"My heart is like a dry river. ”
These are the words written in the diary of Shi Fengming, a left-behind child.
She said: "I envy those who have parents very much, I have envied a lot, and I have low self-esteem a lot. ”
Since she was a child, her only friend was a puppy, and as soon as she whistled, the puppy would run towards her with its tail wagging its tail.
However, a few weeks later, the director asked her where the puppy had gone?
She said: "It's already divided, half of the teacher, half of the uncle." ”
After saying that, she lowered her head, her face full of sadness.
With her parents not around, she can't even protect her only beloved puppy.
Someone asked: How can she control her emotions at such a young age?
Someone below replied: "Because she may have had many more sad moments than this." ”
Her life is like a weed that no one cares about, swaying in the wind, and no one knows where her fate is going.
Xiao Fengming is not only Xiao Fengming, there are thousands of left-behind children behind her.
In August 2023, statistics from the Ministry of Education showed:
In 2023, the number of left-behind children in rural areas will be 15,505,600.
Behind the cold figures, there are more than 15.5 million children, growing up alone, and more than 15.5 million pairs of parents, enduring separation and struggling to make a living.
They are distributed in all corners of the city, in all walks of life, doing the hardest work, living the simplest life, and enduring the most painful parting.
Why don't they want to take their children with them?
But life is too hard, the conditions are too difficult, they can only let themselves live the most simple life, and then send all the money home.
In order to provide for the children's education, they can save from their own rations and eat steamed buns with boiling water for several days in a row.
What you swallow is not only dry and hard steamed buns, but also a bitter life.
On the construction site, the rice pot was accidentally blown over, and the vegetables were spilled on the ground.
They didn't think it was dirty, so they ate the vegetables on the ground with steamed buns, because they were bought with their hard-earned money.
Sometimes, a few spoonfuls of fried flour mixed with water are enough food for a hard day's work.
If it weren't for the children who were studying in their hometown, and their elderly parents, who wouldn't want to live a decent life?
I've seen a comment: How much money did you make when you went out to work and left your children at home?
Those who can say this sentence probably won't understand that in this world, there are still too many hardships that have to be done.
For many ordinary people, survival and companionship seem to stand at both ends of the scale.
If you put down the bricks, you can't support you, and if you lift the bricks, you can't hold you, which is a true portrayal of countless parents.
The pain of separation is not only experienced by children, but also by parents.
They have a meager income, and in this city, they don't even have a place to live, so what conditions do they have to take their children with them.
They are frugal and do their best to earn money.
The stacks of bricks they picked up in their hands were all helping the children pave a way to the distance.
"The child will understand me when he is older. They consoled themselves with this countless times.
When talking about children, the tears in their eyes are still extremely uncomfortable.
Regrets?
Of course there is.
Every time the child cries when they are separated, and every time they pick up the phone, the strangeness in the child's voice constantly tortures the hearts of the parents.
In life, there are too many sufferings, and tears can't be shed.
So, when I see someone putting a child in a cart cage and setting up a stall:
When I saw someone with a child delivering takeaways, I felt awe-inspired.
For them, this may be the best choice in desperation.
At the very least, they are with the child, and at least, the child can see his parents every day.
That's enough.
They are lucky, but in our country there are tens of millions of children who cannot be with their parents.
It will take time to solve the problem of left-behind children, and we will need to improve the system.
I look forward to the day when there will be more opportunities in the countryside, and the city will show a more warm face, and the flesh and blood will no longer be separated, and family affection will no longer be lacking.
I only hope that those long-awaited eyes, those sorrows and tears that do not belong to childhood, a little less, a little less!