Normally, no one is truly lonely, and those who drink and sing lonely all day long are just spiritually unsustenance, or they want to be lonely.
True loneliness is like being in a deserted wilderness, where there is no civilization, only the boundless nature.
Few people can bear true loneliness, which is murderous and unbearable.
Human beings are social animals, in society, is to help each other to survive and develop, we must not only give ourselves to help others, but also need to rely on the strength of others to overcome difficulties when necessary.
People are grateful for gratitude, and the so-called grace of dripping water should be reciprocated by springs, which is the basic quality of people.
The exchange of kindness between each other is also the generation of a relationship, and the relationship between the two parties is constantly sublimated under mutual help, which will be a relatively pure relationship without the influence of interests.
Kindness means favor, and if others help you, you owe favors.
Many people are more resistant to owing favors, there is a way that money is easy to repay and difficult to repay, and it is more difficult to repay debts, some people do not value favors, and feel that others have helped them, the big deal is to invite a meal, but in fact, it is not the case, repay the benefactor, don't invite him to dinner, it is better to do this.
Give them what they want, give them what they need
If you want to repay the favor, you must make the other party feel that what you give back to him is full of value, and make him feel that his help is worth it.
Of course, this doesn't have to be physical, it can be a thousand words of thanks, or a closer relationship, etc.
But for ourselves, we still have to let the other party get substantial benefits, and if we want to give back to the other party, we must first think about what the other party needs.
You can't rely on your own wishful thinking alone, otherwise you're just expressing your own heart and not letting your feedback really help substantially, and there's a difference.
It's like someone else's home has no shortage of household appliances, but you insist on giving a refrigerator, although the gift is expensive, but it is useless.
To put it simply, you will give what the other party likes, for example, the other party likes fishing, you can send high-end fishing rods, the other party likes to play, you can send a pair of good sneakers and so on.
In addition, we can also understand what the other party's recent difficulties are, and whether we can take the initiative to help him in turn, which is the most direct and effective way to repay the kindness.
Remember kindness and help each other
It is said that it is difficult to repay favors, because once you ask for help from the other party, it is equivalent to owing favors.
Owing a favor is not like owing money, there is no fixed repayment period, and there is no fixed way, which is equivalent to the other party grasping the initiative.
You don't know when or what kind of trouble the other person will encounter, but one thing is that as long as the other party speaks, we have no reason to refuse things that are within our ability.
Many people are willing to help others, they may have certain difficulties in the future, and they will also need the help of others.
Since you owe a favor, don't think about how troublesome it is, but think that both sides are helping each other.
It's not that the other party has done you a favor, but you also helped the other party once this time, and the two sides will be clear, from the perspective of human relations, this should be called the balance of human feelings, not the two clear relationships.
The other party can help you, which shows that the other party can generate value to you in some way, and such a relationship is worth maintaining, even if there is no debt to the relationship, you must always exchange money to maintain the relationship.
Cherish the help and live up to expectations
If someone of a much higher level and strength than you helps you, your reward may not be needed by the other party.
Many times, what is precious in your eyes may be ordinary in the eyes of others.
Not to mention inviting guests to dinner, the best way to repay at this time is to make the other party feel that his help is valuable and has a profound impact on you, which will make him feel that he is very discerning and will have a certain sense of superiority.
You can continue to maintain a relatively close relationship with him, and report to him every once in a while on your latest situation.
Of course, the status quo must get better and better, so that he feels that his help to you is useful, so that you can grow step by step, and live up to the other party's mention, which is also a kind of reward.
Different classes will have different values, and for people who are much higher than you, you can not provide much for them, only a self who has become better and stronger because of his help.
This is also an incentive for individuals, not to live up to the expectations of the other party, to cherish the hard-won resources and opportunities, but also to make the favor worthwhile, it cannot be said that the debt is ineffective.
The people regard food as the sky, and the Chinese pay attention to solving problems at the dinner table, exchanges and cooperation.
It is normal for the other party to help you and invite him to a meal, but you can't say that you just eat a meal, you should make the other party feel worthwhile for your efforts, this is the core, and eating a meal can't achieve this effect.
The other person is willing to help you, first of all, the other person recognizes you as a person, which means that your relationship can go further.
Interpersonal relationships are developed in this back and forth, help is the beginning, to take this opportunity to develop relationships, network resources are not too much, the more resources, the smoother the development.