Before reading this article, I sincerely invite you to click the "Follow" button, so that you can continue to push such articles in the future, and it is also convenient for you to discuss and share, your support is the driving force for us to insist on creating~
My name is Li Xin, I am 42 years old and I have been divorced for 5 years. My husband and I divorced 5 years ago due to emotional discord, and since then I have been living alone. After the divorce, although I was single, I never had the idea of falling in love. I put all my energy into my work, hoping to numb the loneliness in my heart by being busy.
A "ding-dong" chime interrupted my thoughts. I excitedly clicked into the chat interface, my finger lingering in the input box for a long time, and finally typed a sentence: "Zhang Qiang, do you remember me? I'm Li Xin." ”
"I'm fine! I'm divorced, but my work and life are fulfilling. ”
"I see. Everything has a meaning. Are you still Xi to your life now?" I've picked a more neutral question.
"Xi it. Living in a suburban community, he walks his dog every day, and occasionally gets together with old colleagues. It's bland but it's good. ”
"Sounds great!"
"Why don't you invite you to my house on the weekend and catch up while eating?"
"Okay, I'm free on Saturday afternoon. ”
"Great! See you on Saturday!"
On Saturday, I dressed up and put on my favorite red dress in college, wanting to relive our college days with Zhang Qiang. When he appeared in front of me, I still couldn't help but blush. 20 years later, he is still so sunny and handsome.
"Xinxin, you look more and more beautiful!" Zhang Qiang smiled and hugged me.
"Whereever, you're still so young and handsome!" I smiled back.
In this way, we met and chatted more and more frequently. One day, Zhang Qiang asked me to eat at a newly opened restaurant. The restaurant has a great atmosphere, soft light and upbeat music. Just as we were facing each other eating dessert, Zhang Qiang suddenly held my hand.
"Shin Shin, I feel very happy to spend time with you. You say, are we destined?"
My eyes widened in surprise: "Are you confessing to me?"
"Yes," he said, "I actually liked you when I was in college." It's a pity that we couldn't be together at that time. Now that we have met by chance, I really don't want to miss it again. "
In this way, in the restaurant, Zhang Qiang and I were officially together. It's like a fairy tale. After 20 years of losing touch, I was back together with my old crush! is obviously in his 40s, but this relationship is as sweet and touching as a boy and girl.
Hearing his confession, my heart hit like a deer. Reunited after 20 years, our relationship is like going back to 20 years ago. That night, I had sex with Zhang Qiang. I showed him my most vulnerable side, and he cared for me gently. When the climax came, I burst into tears. I know that this is not only the union of the body, but also the union of the heart.
Afterwards, my mind was full of Zhang Qiang. Every moment I spent with him made me feel incredibly happy and satisfied. This is the love I have always dreamed of, passionate and warm and considerate.
Zhang Qiang heard the movement and hurriedly ran in to see me: "What's wrong baby, what's wrong with you?"
Knowing this news, I was like five thunderbolts. What? I have a venereal disease? I obviously only had a relationship with Zhang Qiang!
"Zhang Qiang, you scumbag! You lie to me! You trick me! I hate you to death!!"
With that, I wiped my tears and walked out of the door, leaving him speechless. He was so sick and lured me into having sex with him. I can't wait to chop him up with a knife!
When I got home, I cried with my headache in frustration. It's a shame to have a venereal disease! What will Xiaofen and other friends think of me when they find out? Besides, my body hurts so badly that it's almost fatal.
Just when I was desperate, a phone call came in from my friend Xiaofen. She comforted me gently: "Don't blame yourself, it's normal to meet this kind of scumbag." Fortunately, it is good to find and treat the disease in time, don't be too sad!"
Her words relieved me a lot. That's right, I'm also innocent when I meet a scumbag like Zhang Qiang! I'm a girl, how can I know so much? Anyway, if I get sick, I will have to be treated sooner or later, and then I will be a lesson in life!
After figuring it out, I regained my confidence and was ready to actively go to the hospital for treatment. Fortunately, I had the financial means to search the Internet for the best local hospital for this treatment. I was determined to stay in the hospital for full treatment during this time!
Sure enough, when I entered this hospital, I obviously felt that the environment and equipment were very professional. The attending doctor was also very responsible and developed a comprehensive treatment plan for me for one month.
Under the careful care of the doctors and nurses, I gradually recovered from my illness. With each passing day, I feel like I'm one step closer to being healthy. It also increased my confidence in overcoming the disease!
In this way, during my hospital stay, I kept reflecting on what had happened. Obviously, I am also a mature woman, why am I so easily deceived? Probably I have always had an ideal character of Zhang Qiang in my heart, blindly imagining that he is still like the upright big boy back then. I was so naïve!
But there is still a long way to go in life, so this time I will learn a lesson. I will never trust someone easily in the future, I must protect myself and choose someone who is really good to me! A month later, with the doctor's announcement, I was finally cured and discharged from the hospital. This month's treatment was really not easy, but I got through it. Xiaofen drove to the hospital to pick me up, and the two sisters hugged each other with tears in their eyes. I was so lucky to have family and friends who reached out during my toughest times.
After I was discharged from the hospital, I deleted all of Zhang Qiang's contact information. As for the explanation and apology messages he sent, I didn't read them all. I don't believe the words of a scumbag anymore. I only hope that what happened to me can make more girls wake up and not be deceived by rhetoric!
When I returned to work, I put my heart and soul into my work, hoping to heal myself through my career. At the same time, I also started to exercise actively and maintain an optimistic and positive attitude. I see this as a wake-up call from God to me, and I must be a better version of myself!
Occasionally, I can't help but think back to the bits and pieces I was with Zhang Qiang. Indeed, the first days were so beautiful that I almost thought it was fairytale love. But the cruelty of reality tells me that life is not a fairy tale, and I have to grow up. Maybe my wishful thinking hastened this fall, but I don't regret it. Because it makes me grow.
Sometimes, I will also see some young couples who are very similar to us back then, looking sweet and sweet. I would laugh softly and think to myself, I envy them and bless them. I hope they can enjoy the purest and most beautiful feelings and will not experience what happened to me.
In this way, day after day, I slowly walked out of the shadow of that pain. Instead of being afraid of being alone, I started to enjoy my time alone. I also learned to value myself more and not to give my heart easily. I used to be trapped by love, but now I have learned to be alone. I believe that God will favor me, and I will meet true love one day!
I thought that Zhang Qiang would only become a passer-by in my memories. Unexpectedly, half a year later, one day, I fell in love with a gentleman surnamed Wang. Mr. Wang, who was introduced to me by my parents, was 10 years older than me and worked as an executive in a listed company. After chatting with him, I found him calm and reserved, and polite. That's exactly what I wanted.
In this way, under the witness of my parents, Mr. Wang and I entered the palace of marriage. When he knelt down on one knee in front of me and put the ring on me, I burst into tears of emotion. I've finally waited for this day!
There is still a long way to go in life, and my story is far from over. No matter how many difficulties I encounter, I will face them bravely and live a positive life. I believe that God will definitely favor those who work hard in life. I also sincerely wish every girl, may you all meet the most suitable happiness for yourself! Time flies, and in a blink of an eye, Mr. Wang and I have stepped in, with both children and a happy family. The pain at the beginning has long since disappeared, and I have gradually forgotten those unbearable pasts. Until one day, a phone call shattered our peaceful life.
"Hey, Li Xin, I'm Zhang Qiang. A familiar male voice came from the other end of the line.
When I heard the name, I was thrilled. Zhang Qiang: Why did he find me again?
"What's the matter?" I steadied my emotions and asked lightly.
I was silent on the other end of the phone. Zhang Qiang, a man I have hated for many years, did not expect to ask me for help one day. I could have hung up, but I asked him, "What's wrong?"
"It's cirrhosis, and it's in the terminal stage. I've been drinking too much over the years to make myself like this. The doctor said that if he didn't have surgery, he might not last three months. "
It turned out that all these years of alcohol had left little of his body. I can't help but think of his heroic appearance when we first fell in love, and in the blink of an eye, he became an erosive old man who was about to die.
I have mixed feelings in my heart. Resentment, sympathy, a thousand flavors welled up in my heart. I knew he didn't have much time left, so I said, "Okay, I promise you, I'll donate blood." You send me the address of the hospital. "
Hanging up, I pondered why I had agreed to him. I'm not a saint, so why should I be so kind as to save his life? But I know that I can't be ruthless and let him die. After all, 20 years ago, I really loved him.
In this way, with the support of Mr. Wang, I came to Zhang Qiang's surgery hospital and took blood to donate a standard amount. The doctor said that my blood could significantly prolong his life and help him survive the surgery. I didn't go to see him one last time and left the hospital quietly.
It dawned on me. It turned out that the last time I came into contact with other people's blood was when I donated blood to Zhang Qiang! Thinking of this, I was extremely angry. Well, now he not only ruined my youth, but now he is still making me sick in my old age! I am such a bad person, he saved his life, and he is good to kill people!
In this way, I began a long time with my "old friend" of hepatitis C. For the sake of my family and friends, I chose to go public about my condition once my condition stabilized. Everyone expressed their willingness to accept me as they really are. My wife was even more affectionate and spent 6 years with me until he died.
I whimpered and woke up from my nightmare. It turned out that it was all a dream, and I am still alive and well, and I am honestly supporting the elderly with my wife. It was getting late, and I rubbed my temples and comforted myself that it was just a ridiculous dream.
However, this dream was so real that I couldn't calm down for a long time. Especially the name Zhang Qiang, it tore at my nerves. I tossed and turned and couldn't sleep, my mind full of what he was like when he was younger.
"What's wrong baby, insomnia?" My wife asked me with concern.
I sighed softly and told him about my dreams. After listening quietly, my wife said after a moment of silence: "After so many years, why mention him again." You've done well and I'll always be with you. ”
I was moved to hug my wife and find the long-lost stability in his arms. That's right, when it comes to the past, I don't have any grief because I live in the present and have the best life.
"Oops, why did you suddenly remember to talk about Zhang Qiang, a scumbag?" Xiao Fen asked in surprise.
I'm going to tell you about last night's dream. She laughed after hearing this: "After so many years, he is still torturing you in your dreams, what a pitiful!"
I was also amused by her: "Yes, I am living so happily now, how can I suffer because of him again?"
"That's right!" Xiao Fen raised the teacup, "Come, let it pass, cheers!"
"Cheers!"
In this way, in the company of my family and netizens, I happily spent one golden year after another. Occasionally, when I think of Zhang Qiang, I only feel a little regretful, and there is no pain or embarrassment.
Although I have long lost contact, I still have mixed feelings in my heart when I learn of his death at this moment. I began to recall the moments I had with him, and I couldn't help but cry. Those green years were frozen forever with his passing, and became a notch in my heart that will not disappear.
"Baby, don't be sad, it's all over. Feeling my grief, my wife soothed me.
I quietly wiped away my tears: "I'm fine, I just didn't expect him to be gone so early." After all, the first good memories of life are now eternal. ”
My wife nodded and clapped my hand.
Yes, everything has become eternal. Those years have passed into memories that will never fade in my mind. They made me laugh bitterly, cry and laugh and forget, and they were etched in the depths of my soul. All these flavors have made me who I am today.
I can't help but wonder, will he also look back at us in heaven? What kind of existence did those youthful years, those love and hatred be to him?
After all, there is no way to know. I could only say to him softly in my heart:
Goodbye, my lost youth.