Statement|Liu Huizong
Editor|Lao Yu
When people are old, pension is always an unavoidable topic, and it is also a big problem to choose which way to provide for the elderly.
In the past, when I thought about the problem of providing for the elderly, it was difficult not only for me, but also for my children.
Later, I also wanted to open it and chose a way to care for the elderly that was most suitable for me, and my children were very grateful to me.
Hello everyone, my name is Liu Huizong and I am 71 years old.
I was born in the countryside, I lived in the countryside, and I have never left my hometown much in my life.
I have a son and a daughter, and my daughter married into the same township, which is ten miles away from me.
After graduating from university, my son stayed in the city and has now settled in the city.
In the past, my wife and I were both in the village, and we were only in our 60s at that time, and I was young and able to work, so I rarely thought about the future of retirement.
But since my wife passed away in 5 years, the topic of pension has often appeared in my mind.
I began to think, I'm just a farmer who does manual work, if I can't work anymore, and I don't have a pension in the future, what will I do in the future?
At first I struggled, but then I suddenly became enlightened again.
Because I think, don't I have a son and a daughter?
I don't think the same way as the rest of the village.
They all said that when their children grow up, they will have their own homes and lives, and parents should take care of themselves.
But I don't agree, I think it's a matter of course for me to raise my children to be young and my children to raise me to be old.
When I want to take care of my children in the future, they will have to provide for me.
A few years ago, it was less than 70, and I didn't think it was time yet, so I thought I could still work, so I should pay a little more.
But as soon as I reached 70, I couldn't hold back my inner thoughts, I thought that I had worked hard all my life, all for my children, and it was time for them to support me in my old age.
I called all my children home and told them very seriously: Dad is old, 70 years old this year, and it will be five or six years at most.
So this last bit of time, I want to live a good life, you two will give me a pension.
Speaking of which, my children are muttering, and they don't seem to know how to provide for me.
I watched as both of them were silent, so I made a decision for them.
I said: Don't be entangled, the brother and sister will work together, I will go to my son's house for a year, and then go to my daughter's house for another year.
My children have no problem with my proposal.
I packed my things first and went straight to my son's house.
At first, I planned to live at my son's house for a year, but after only two months, I couldn't help but pack up my things and leave.
Because I found that living at my son's house was really unhappy, because I didn't understand a reason at first.
That is, it is natural for my son to provide for me, but my daughter-in-law has no such obligation.
During my time at my son's house, it was okay at first.
Later, I found out that my daughter-in-law didn't talk to me, didn't sit at the same table with me during meals, and always went back to the room with food.
Later, the daughter-in-law simply didn't go home, and it was the same for several days.
And the first thing I do every time I come back is to quarrel, ostensibly quarreling with my son, but in fact, it means that Sang scolded Huai and scolded me.
After living for two months, I really can't stand this atmosphere, not to mention coming to retire, it's difficult to have a few more quiet days.
So I packed my things, said goodbye to my son and daughter-in-law, and took the car back to the countryside.
Before I went back, I thought that it was normal for my daughter-in-law not to see me, and that people in the city were cultured people, and they didn't have much contact with me.
I can always go to my daughter's house, they are all people in the same place, and their living Xi are the same, so it is definitely appropriate for me to go to their house.
However, I left within three days of being at my daughter's house.
Because in the days when I was at my son-in-law's house, my father-in-law and mother-in-law came from time to time.
My son-in-law and other uncles also came to visit the house often, and I was really embarrassed to stay there and feel the strange eyes of others, so I quickly packed up my things and left.
Back in the village, I stayed alone for a month.
But later, I still felt unconvinced, and I didn't think that my children could refuse to support me for this reason.
Later, I thought, just take a step back, my request to my children is that these two people will each give me 1,000 yuan a month, and I will have 2,000 yuan in total, so that I can support myself.
Also, every weekend, my siblings take turns visiting me at home, so that I am not alone and I can talk to them about something.
I don't think it's difficult, I don't ask for a lot of money, and I don't need them to be with me every day.
But even so, the son and daughter still complained bitterly, saying that this was inappropriate and unreasonable, and they couldn't do it.
At first, I was very angry when I heard my children's answers, and I said to them angrily: They are all white-eyed wolves, I raised you so much for nothing, and now that I am old, I can't make such a request?
My son and daughter saw that I was angry and didn't dare to talk more, and finally agreed to my request.
A few months ago, the brother and sister were quite punctual, and the two of them paid 1,000 yuan a month on time.
In addition, my siblings take turns to visit me at home every weekend, cook for me, and talk to me.
But after half a year, the brother and sister slacked off.
Every time it was my son's turn to come home to see me, my son always procrastinated, and many times he didn't come home at all.
My daughter too, said that she would give 1,000 yuan a month, sometimes she didn't give it, and sometimes she only gave a few hundred yuan.
I complained to them that they were slacking off and starting to be irresponsible again.
The son said helplessly: "Dad, otherwise I will send you to a nursing home, where there is food and drink, and someone will take care of you." ”
I didn't agree with my son's request, and said to him: If I have no children and no daughters, it's okay, I still have two children and go to a nursing home, which is really a joke.
The son had to cry: Dad, I am more than 100 kilometers away, and I go home twice a month, sometimes it is not very convenient, I have a lot of things.
I don't agree, I think my son just doesn't have a heart, so he doesn't accept it.
Similarly, when I got to my daughter's side, my daughter also cried: Dad, I can't make money, our family's current money is earned by Ah Feng alone, the child wants to study, and I can't go to work, so I give you 1,000 a month, I really can't do it.
I can understand what my daughter said, because in their family, only the son-in-law is making money, and the son-in-law's salary is not high.
For a while, I didn't think all three of us were happy.
I don't think my children are very filial, and they don't really care about me as a father.
My children often think that I am embarrassing them, one saying that they have no time, and the other saying that they have no money.
For a while, I even felt a little embarrassed that even if my son and daughter came back to see me, they didn't have anything to say to me, so they packed up their things and left.
After thinking about it, I felt that this was not the way to go.
Later, I thought that my daughter was at home with the children, and she was close to me, so she often had time to visit me.
It's just that I can't go to work, I don't have money, and I'm financially difficult.
My son is far away, and it is really difficult for him to let him go home often, but he has a high income and does not have to worry about financial problems.
So, I also figured it out, the brother and sister simply have time to contribute time, and money to pay.
I told both of you that you don't have to worry about it.
My son gives me 2,000 yuan a month, I don't have to go back twice a month, I can go home if I want to, and it doesn't matter if I don't want to go back.
My daughter doesn't have to give me 1,000 yuan a month.
Not only did I not have to give it, but I also took out 1,200 yuan from the 2,000 yuan my son gave me every month to my daughter, and I kept the remaining 800 yuan for myself as pocket money, and I only needed her to come home to see me once a week.
As soon as this method came out, the children were very happy.
The son said: That's really good, I used to go home twice a month, not only tired, but also consumed gas, now the time is saved, the gas money is saved, and the extra money can be given to me.
As for her daughter, she was even happier, she said: Not only do I not have to pay 1,000 yuan, but I can also pay 1,200 yuan, and I will go to work.
Now, my sons and daughters are very conscientious, my son transfers money on time and calls me often, and my daughter comes back to the village every week with things to see me, and the family is comfortable.
Now that I think about it, people sometimes have to change their thinking and can't have a tendon, but now this way of providing for the elderly is the most suitable for me, and my children are also very grateful to me.
I don't know what everyone thinks?