My name is Lin Xiaomei and I come from a small county town in Changde, Hunan Province. Every year the New Year is my most anxious day.
As soon as my mother called, the anticipation in her tone made me feel an invisible pressure in my heart. "Ah, we Xiaomei should go home, it's all La Ba, don't you hurry up and pack up?" It's a big reunion this year, and your parents are looking forward to your return.
I sighed silently in my heart. I knew that once I went back, it would be a long and tiring work that awaited me. Purchasing, washing, chopping, stir-frying, making dumplings, pinching lantern festival, making sugar fried chestnuts, fried peanuts, barbecue.
All I can think of Chinese New Year's Eve every part of the meal, every dish, will fall on me alone.
"Mom, I still have to work, let's talk about it for the New Year." I answered perfunctorily and did not say yes directly.
"Work? What's not more important than going home for the New Year? After all these years, when did it become like this? Mom's voice immediately became serious, "Did the Beijing man you were looking for teach you?" He won't let you go home? ”
"Mom, no, you think too much." I hastened to explain, but Mom had already hung up. I knew she must have been angry.
Completely different from my mother, my memories of the New Year are only endless busyness and fatigue. Mom and Dad were busy receiving guests, and my sisters and I became the main force in the kitchen.
Now I have settled down in Beijing and have my own work and life. I could have had a much easier life, but I couldn't escape the annual family pressure.
I know this is just the beginning. From today on, my mother will call me every day to urge me to come home. I had to think of a way to get rid of the shackles of the New Year.
This small wish should not be taken away by anyone.
I found a new job in Beijing through my cousin Wang Xiaofang.
My cousin works for a confinement company, and she felt that this job was a good fit for me. "You are so good at raising children and cooking, it is most suitable to come to our company as a confinement sister-in-law."
At first, I was a little hesitant. The lifestyle of Beijingers is so far from our hometown that I don't know if I can adapt.
But my cousin patiently took me to visit several of the families she had served. When young mothers who had just given birth saw me, they had a trusting look in their eyes.
"Auntie, you look very kind.
Before the New Year, my cousin told me that she was going back to her hometown for the Chinese New Year and asked me to help take care of a 7-month-old baby in Beijing.
I couldn't be happier. This means that I can stay in Beijing and don't have to go home for the New Year.
"Really?" I asked my cousin excitedly.
"Yes, if this family doesn't go back to their hometown for the New Year, you can help them take care of the children, cook, and overtime pay." The cousin said.
I immediately decided I wanted to stay. Finally, I don't have to face the endless New Year arrangements of my family!
I happily told my husband Zheng Jianjun the news. He was stunned for a moment and said, "How sad your mother should be if you don't go back."
I explained, "You know, I will only suffer when I go back, and I hope you can understand me." ”
My husband thought and said, "Okay, I'll go back and tell your mother for you." It is estimated that she will say that our husband and wife are not filial again.
Sure enough, knowing that I was not going home, my mother-in-law immediately called and said that I had no filial piety, and now she could only work hard for her husband.
I asked my husband to buy the things I needed for the New Year according to my list. He complained that the list was too long, and I said, "Then go to the kitchen and stir-fry yourself, and you will know how tired you are when you walk through it."
During the Chinese New Year, my husband sent me a message complaining that I was so busy at home that I was tired half to death. I secretly rejoiced in my heart that he finally realized my hard work over the years.
I learned the family's schedule and children's preferences with the baby's mother in advance. Early that morning, I came to their house to start my first Chinese New Year celebration in Beijing.
It was also the first time in my life that I was truly relaxed about welcoming the Spring Festival. A long-lost joy and satisfaction rose up in my heart.
This year's Spring Festival, I spent a relaxing day in Beijing.
When I got up early in the morning, I took my baby to the sun and bask on the balcony. The baby wears a thick little padded jacket, giggles, and his two little arms keep waving.
After changing the baby's diaper, I started preparing breakfast for the boss and hostess. They left late last night, and I specially prepared hot egg porridge and crispy fritters.
The owner's family was going to buy New Year's goods today, so they went out early. I'm home alone with my baby, and I can tidy up the house at a leisurely pace and watch TV series with my baby in my arms.
At noon, they bought goods for many years and came back, busy with storage, so that I didn't have to worry about lunch, and ordered takeout myself.
I was dangling around the bedroom with my well-fed baby, and he fell asleep sweetly. I also took a nap and had a good dream.
The owner and the hostess took the children together in the evening, so that I could wash early and rest. I haven't had this kind of easy days without burdens for a long time.
I called my hometown to say hello. My husband said he and my parents were doing well and I didn't have to worry.
Hanging up, I sat alone on the balcony looking at the city in the night. The New Year in Beijing is different from my hometown, but I found a new way to celebrate.
This experience of celebrating the Chinese New Year in Beijing has given me a new outlook on my future life.
I thought that as long as I didn't go home, I would be able to stay away from the troubles of the New Year. Now I understand that my relationship with my family should not be an either/or choice.
I will go home and be reunited with them at the appropriate time. But I will also stick to my own lifestyle and maintain my family and life.
This time, I let my family experience my hard work on weekdays. I also felt their care and support for me.
Every Spring Festival in the future, I will make the most suitable arrangements for myself and my family according to the situation at that time.
Even when I don't go back to my hometown, I video greet each other. I will go back with their favorite New Year goods to greet the New Year.
In Beijing, I will continue to take care of the baby who needs me and live a simple and fulfilling life. This has become a little habit of mine.
Sometimes we can't change the environment, but we can choose our own mindset. For me, the Spring Festival is no longer a burden, but a burden to put down and welcome new hopes.
There is still a long way to go in life, and I believe that through constant communication, my family will eventually understand my choice. And I will cherish my family's love for me.
Whenever the spring breeze blows, we can still gather together to celebrate the Chinese New Year. It's just that the form will be different.
I believe that as long as we understand and support each other, the bond of family will become stronger. No matter where the Spring Festival is, the warmth of home will always exist in the heart.
One day after the New Year, I received a call from my mother.
"Hey, Xiaomei? Happy New Year! Mom's voice sounded happy.
"Mom, Happy New Year!" I also greet with pleasure.
"Son, how are you doing in Beijing?" Mom asked with concern.
"Very good, don't worry."
"That's good, that's good. Your dad was always worried that you were out there alone. ”
"You don't have to worry about me, I'm having a good time." I comforted.
"Well, I can see it, listening to your voice is quite energetic. We're also worried about whether you'll be lonely if you celebrate the New Year alone.
"I have a baby here to take care of, and the New Year is quite lively. You're just going on a trip. I said with a smile.
"It's okay you can come back every year, or go out occasionally for a different environment. As long as you're happy. Mom said open-mindedly.
I was pleasantly surprised to find that my mother's attitude had become so open-minded. I am very pleased with this realization.
"By the way, Jianjun came back and mentioned to us, saying that you usually work hard, and we didn't understand it very well before. He told us not to force you anymore.
"What he said was, I appreciate it." I say it sincerely.
"Who made you the eldest daughter of our family." But you've also worked so hard for so many years, it's time to take care of yourself.
Now knowing that you're doing well outside, we're relieved.
"Thank you, Mom." I listened to it and my heart warmed.
"Our family is worried about you. Your happiness is our greatest satisfaction. Although I didn't come back this year, I have always been together in my heart.
"I know, Mom."
"Well, you still have a job, so let's not talk about it. Remember to take care of yourself and go home more often when you have time. ”
"Definitely. You and Dad also take care of your health. ”
"Okay, bye!"
"Bye bye!"
I hung up the phone and my heart was full of emotion. The conversation was like a spring rain that washed away the gap between me and my mother.
I understand that life will not always go well, but with understanding and support among family members, all difficulties will eventually pass.
This spring rain provoked my thinking. I will continue to work hard to find a balance in my life that satisfies both my family and myself.
There is still a long way to go, but I know that I have family who have always supported and encouraged me. This year's trip to Beijing has taken my relationship with my family to a higher level.
I looked out the window, and the sky became brighter, like my inner world, washed by this spring rain. I took a deep breath and marched firmly into the new year.
Hung up my mom's phone and I felt like everything was different. The understanding and support of my family gave me the strength to keep going.
The pre-New Year anxiety disappeared and I started planning for the new year. I decided to continue working in Beijing for a while, and I really enjoyed the job.
My cousin said that she could introduce me to more markets and make me a professional childcare sister-in-law. I also want to further my education in this field, which will not only allow me to grow, but also help more dual-career moms.
I started taking orders proactively and soon had a second client. They are a white-collar couple living in Chaoyang District, and their 3-month-old baby has just been born and needs professional supervision.
This time I was more skilled and quickly established a routine for my baby, who slept and ate well. The baby will smile happily when he sees me and clap his hands to call me sister.
The couple was also very happy with me. When my children are sick, I accompany them to the hospital. When I work overtime, I take extra care of the children.
Once, the family wanted to take their children on vacation, so they took me with them. Our family was out and about and my baby and I became closer.
I send money home every month and video with my family to tell them I'm doing well. I wanted to give my parents a stable old age, and this idea made me extremely clear.
Life in Beijing is fast-paced, but I'm not alone. The children of the client's family are like my brothers and sisters, and I nurture them with love.
From spring to autumn, I have been in Beijing for more than a year.
On this day, my husband called to say that something had happened at home and wanted me to go back to help. I gladly accepted.
I decided to go home and live for a while. My parents are also old, and I want to spend more time with them.
When I got home, I got my childhood feeling back. I took good care of my parents, went for walks in the park with them, and cooked delicious meals.
I also feel their love for me.
I accompanied my parents to check their health and gave them a physical examination. Over the past few months, their physical condition has improved a lot.
This time home, I connected with my family, and also let my parents see my mature and independent side. I am not the youngest daughter they need to care for, but a daughter who can support the family.
I began to think about whether I should stay in my hometown and bring my parents to live in Beijing. I want to give them a warm old age.
After staying at home for half a year, I decided to return to Beijing for the time being. I told my family that I would definitely come back for a reunion this year.
I have found balance in my life and my family will always be there for me.
Time flies, and in the blink of an eye, it's the end of the year. A year has passed, and I also have a small sense of accomplishment in Beijing.
My cousin recently introduced clients to me. My reputation is also growing in the circle of confinement. Many pregnant women or women have come to me with the hope that I can teach them how to care for their baby.
I myself see endless possibilities in this industry. If the children are older, I can do tutoring and teach them lessons.
I'm thinking about whether to set up a studio. The target can be either a mother or a child. I can invite other excellent confinement sisters-in-law to join us to spread professional parenting knowledge and help more families.
The idea excites me. I saw a bigger purpose and mission in life. It turns out that I can get rid of the shackles of my family and create the value of life through my own efforts.
I told my husband about this idea. He was very supportive of me and said that I should use my strengths so that more people can benefit from it.
I decided to start my business officially after the Spring Festival. In order to raise funds, I have recently taken on a lot of clients. Everyone said that I was one of the best confinement sisters-in-law in Beijing, and I gradually gained confidence.
The Spring Festival was coming, and my mother began to urge me to go home for the New Year. I smiled and told her that I must go back this year and had already bought my tickets.
My mother was very happy, said that she would cook my favorite dish, and asked me to think in advance if there were any wontons I wanted to eat on the way home, and she would prepare them and deliver them to the station in advance.
After hanging up the phone, I felt that the weight of home was finally no longer a shackle, but a warm aura. It gives me the strength to pursue my dreams and a safe haven.
The family finally understood and supported each other through this year. In the new year, I am moving forward with hope.
I believe the days ahead will be better because I have found the courage to be myself and the wisdom to balance life.