Today, the younger generation is too busy in the workplace to take care of their young children, often leaving them in the care of elderly parents. However, this move also means that the diversity of old age is sacrificed.
But have we ever thought about the question:
Do parents have a moral duty to care for their grandchildren?
Is it morally reasonable and legally feasible for parents to ask for "grandchild fees" for bringing grandchildren?
In fact, in the mainland, there are many cases of claiming "grandchildren's fees" for assisting children with children, but the court's judgments are varied.
Recently, an elderly man in Guang'an, Sichuan Province, took his children to court for not paying "grandchildren's fees", which attracted widespread attention. So, what's really going on?
The unsuccessful claim for the "grandchild fee" took the child to court
Ms. Hu and her husband, Mr. Zhu, welcomed a lovely baby in 2016. Because the couple worked in Chengdu, they were unable to take care of their children full-time, and it was not convenient to bring their young children to Chengdu.
After full consideration, they decided to foster the child in their hometown and put it in the care of their grandmother. So, from the end of 2016 to July 2023, the couple worked hard in Chengdu to earn money, while the children were cared for by their grandmother.
Ms. Hu did not ignore her grandmother's hard work in taking care of the child, so before handing over the child to her grandmother, she reached an agreement with her grandmother to pay 1,000 yuan per month for living expenses and 2,000 yuan for a "baby salary", a total of 3,000 yuan per month, and signed a written agreement.
However, in the subsequent care process, the grandmother failed to receive the due "baby fee" as scheduled, but the cost was not small. Ms. Hu's husband did not know much about the agreement.
In July this year, Ms. Hu paid her grandmother only 50,000 yuan. In view of her grandmother's repeated requests for "grandchildren's fees" but no response, she took the couple to court. So, how will the court handle this case?
The court held that Ms. Hu and his wife had failed to fulfill their maintenance obligations for many years and had been relying on their grandmother to perform their duties on their behalf, so they were required to pay the reasonable expenses of their grandmother in caring for their grandson.
Although the grandmother initially asked for 192,000 yuan, the court did not accept it all, and based on the actual situation, rejected some of the excessive demands.
In the end, the court ordered Ms. Hu and her wife to pay 82,500 yuan in child support.
Many netizens have different views on this:
The old man took his children to court for "bringing grandchildren", which may mean the end of family affection.
It is worth noting that this is not the first case in which a child has been sued for "bringing a grandchild".
In Tai'an, Shandong, a similar case occurred, but the court's decision at the time was very different.
When a couple divorced, the child's grandmother sued the daughter-in-law for 100,000 yuan in maintenance on the grounds that she had helped the couple take care of the children during the eight-year marriage.
Unlike the aforementioned case, the court ruled against Grandma on the grounds that she "loves children and protects children" and did not support it.
Although the two cases had different outcomes and circumstances, they together sparked a discussion about whether parents should be financially compensated for their children's work.
This series of events has sparked widespread Internet discussions:
Some people think that it is unreasonable for the elderly to help young people take care of their children and ask for fees, after all, it is their own grandchildren, and it is natural to help;
Others argue that the subsidy is justified because the elderly do not have a legal obligation to care for their grandchildren.
So, from a legal point of view, is it legal for the elderly to ask for payment of "grandchildren"?
What mainland law says:
In these discussions, those who oppose the elderly's request for grandchildren's expenses are actually from the standpoint of family affection and blood relations, while those who support the elderly's claim for expenses are from the perspective of the interests and values of independent individuals.
While both views are valid, each of us should be soberly aware that blood and kinship cannot override personal values, and to do so is to morally kidnap others.
According to Article 1074 of the Civil Code of the People's Republic of China:
Grandparents who can afford it have a legal obligation to support their minor grandchildren who are deceased or unable to support.
That is, grandmothers are obliged to raise and care for minor grandchildren only if the parents are deceased or unable to raise the child.
However, since ancient times, China has valued blood relations and hoped that their children can live a happy life, so many parents see their children struggling between work and family and voluntarily assume the responsibility of caring for their children.
However, over time, it seems that parents helping to take care of their children has become a matter of course. It should be noted that taking care of young children requires not only financial support, but also care for the child's daily life, school transportation, etc., so it takes a lot of energy.
At present, if you hire a nursery from a domestic service company to take care of the child, it is necessary to pay the salary on time, and the market price fluctuates between 4,000 and 10,000 yuan depending on the region.
Therefore, Ms. Hu only pays the child's grandmother 10,000 yuan a year is obviously too little. It is conceivable that during these five or six years, the old man himself had to pay quite a lot.
Therefore, it is actually reasonable for the elderly to ask their children to pay "grandchildren's expenses". We cannot sacrifice the personal value of the elderly because of family affection. If they want, they can live the old age they want, rather than helping to take care of grandchildren for free after raising them.
Parents always put their children first in life, but children often put their parents last.
Chinese-style parents, even if they give everything for their children, can hardly exchange a word of thanks.
I once saw a message for help and said:
"The old man helps take care of the children at home, and he actually asks for 30,000 yuan a year, should I give this money?"
However, the most popular comments were:
"If she doesn't help take care of the children, then don't expect me to take care of her when she is old!"
This quote is widely recognized, but thought-provoking:
When did childcare and retirement become a "trade"?
Do parents have to give everything for their children in order to be entitled to their children's care and attention?
There is a saying that very aptly describes Chinese parents:
"She has no life without herself, shielding her children from the wind and rain when she is young, and making cows and horses for her children's children when she is old, and even having to be careful."
This old man, when helping his children take care of their children, his only pastime is watching TV, but because he is worried about affecting his grandson's studies, he can only watch "silent TV" and cook on time, almost becoming a full-time nanny.
There is also an elderly lady who toils her grandson at her son's house, not only shouldering household chores, but also going to the market to buy ingredients and cook meals. Even if she is unwell, she only takes a short break, for fear of becoming a burden to the children and affecting their normal life.
There are also elderly people who, because their children expect them to come to take care of their children, have to leave their homeland for many years, away from relatives and friends, and embark on a journey to a strange big city. For example, like Grandma Yang, who came all the way to Beijing from her hometown in Henan to take care of her grandchildren, she left her hometown and friends for decades, did not have her own social circle in Beijing, and could not adapt to the fast-paced life of the metropolis. For her, "going back to her hometown" has become her most longed for.
Parents strive to provide everything they can, some even sacrificing everything, while we study. They also try to take care of themselves after we work, and do not want to increase our burden. When we get married and start a family, many of us even put aside our life savings to help us buy a home and a car. And after we had children, they continued to give...
We, as juniors, should see what our parents have done for us and be aware that they are getting older.
There are actually many different options when it comes to caring for children, but no matter how we choose, we cannot shirk our responsibilities as parents, nor can we use blood and affection to put moral pressure on our parents.
"Have pity on the parents of the world", they have given their lives for us, and we should also be grateful, in the quiet moments of time, while they are still alive, to encourage them to pursue their life goals.
Whether it's exploring the world, developing their hobbies, or spending their old age in their youthful hometown...
As long as they can live happily, happily and healthily in their old age, this can also be regarded as a blessing for our children!
On that cold winter day, Grandma Yang came to Beijing, and in order to help her children take care of her grandson, she resolutely left her hometown, relatives and friends for decades. This decision, which seems to be voluntary, actually carries her deep responsibility and sacrifice.
The metropolis life in Beijing is a completely strange world for Grandma Yang. High-rise buildings, busy streets, unfamiliar dialects, everything made her feel a little overwhelmed. However, for the sake of her children and grandchildren, she must adapt to this new life.
Every morning, Grandma Yang gets up early to take care of her grandson's living life. She makes breakfast for the child, helps him get dressed, and takes him to school. Although her steps are no longer so light, she always tries to stay energetic because she knows that it is her responsibility.
During the day, Grandma Yang will do housework to keep the home clean and warm. She carefully washes clothes, sweeps the floor, cooks and makes sure everything is in order. She doesn't want her children to be bothered by her, she wants to make their lives as normal as possible.
Although Grandma Yang's physical condition is not good, she is always reluctant to show it. Occasionally sick, she simply took a break, for fear that she would drag down the children. She is so strong, she bears it silently.
However, Grandma Yang also has deep loneliness and longing. She left her hometown, her family and friends, and came to a strange city. She doesn't have her own social circle, and she has no one to talk to. In Beijing, she is only accompanied by her children and grandchildren, and although their love makes her feel warm, she also often misses life in her hometown.
In this strange city, Grandma Yang gradually adapted to the life of the big city and gradually met some new friends. She participated in community activities and met some elderly people who had similar experiences to her. They became each other's spiritual support and shared the bits and pieces of life together.
Grandma Yang's arrival has brought great convenience to her children's lives, but her efforts are also immeasurable. She was so resilient, so obscure, and for the sake of her children and grandchildren, she was willing to drop everything and leave home to come to a strange city.
Her story tells us that parental love is great and selfless. When they are old, we should return them with the same love and care, so that their later life will be full of happiness and warmth. Whether it is exploring new life experiences or slowly growing old in their hometown, as long as they are happy and happy, it is the greatest happiness of our children. This is a heartwarming story and a touching portrayal of filial piety to parents.
#Headline Creation Challenge## See each other in the headlines ##挑战30天在头条写日记#