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What kind of relationship can last for a long time and reach the end?
After listening to too many standard answers that are consistent and in tune with each other, it was only after some experience that I gradually woke up:
Where in this world are there so many natural couples, some are just two people who are willing to accommodate each other and two hearts that are willing to slowly grind.
Because they want a lasting relationship, both parties are happy to take steps toward the same goal.
You can walk slower, just walk steadily, longer.
I couldn't help but think of Ai Wei and Lisa in the variety show "Goodbye Lover".
Lisa speaks softly and slowly, giving people a gentle feeling like water, but she is very negative in the face of her illness, always does not listen to advice, and stays up late to play mahjong with friends;
In contrast, Ai Wei is much tougher, and after repeatedly persuading Lisa to no avail, he chose to leave briefly because he felt that the other party chose mahjong instead of him.
When I watched the show at that time, I always couldn't help but think while watching:
How did the two people with such a big personality gap go through the wind and rain, overcome the pain, and finally choose to hold each other's hands after experiencing life and death.
Later, after witnessing the amazing changes that occurred in each of the two people, it seemed that he slowly figured out the answer.
Ai Wei, who was used to being hot in the past, slowly learned self-reflection and restraint;
Lisa, who has been suffering from illness, is no longer so passive and has begun to learn to embrace life and beauty. The reason for working hard is nothing more than wanting to live longer and spend a longer time with the people around me.
Gentle people learn to be firm, and fire-like people learn to be peaceful.
They are all making changes for each other, one is a little more accommodating, the other is a little more considerate.
Therefore, love has not faded with time, but has become more turbulent and shining in countless run-ins.
They also let me see the most beautiful look of love:
No one is perfect, but I'm willing to make changes and concessions for you, tinker all the way, and then walk hand in hand to the end of life.
When I was at a party with a friend before, my friend asked me: "You have been with your partner for two or three years, have you ever had a red face and quarreled?" "
I smiled and said, "Of course, noisy, and many times I will have the idea that it is too inappropriate or forget it. "
Speaking of the reasons for quarrels, most of them are because of some trivial things in life.
For example, he always forgets that dark clothes and light clothes should be washed separately.
For example, because of his love of sleeping in, he delayed a lot of pre-arranged trips for two people in vain.
One morning, I saw that the toilet ring with the bathroom was not covered and quarreled with him again, but his attitude always seemed to be so unimpressive, and he began to rummage through old accounts and accuse each other as he talked too much.
Hearing this, the friend couldn't help but pout, with an incredulous expression: "It's all like this, I don't understand how you guys persisted?" "
The result of the dispute that day was naturally unhappy, and since the next day was the weekend, I decided to go back to my parents' house to give both of us a breathing space.
When I returned to my long-lost room, the first thing I saw was the old doll on the table. I threw the doll away because its parts were broken, but now I don't know who picked it up and patched it up and put it here again.
Just as I was about to ask what was going on, my mother walked in and answered my question first.
You young people just don't have patience, you throw things away with a little problem, you see I asked your dad to repair it, this can't be used." "
After a while, he hurried out again to work on dinner.
After listening to his mother's words, he lay on the bed and fell into deep thought.
Things that are broken can be repaired, what about us?
In fact, if you think about it, it is true that there was an argument between me and him, but there were also many warm moments.
When I wanted to watch a horror movie and didn't dare to watch it alone, he would silently put down the game he was playing and come over to watch it with me.
He likes to turn a few pages of books before going to bed, because he is afraid that the sound will make him go to bed early and get up early, and he will return to the bedroom lightly after reading it in the study.
People always seem to magnify the inappropriateness of the two because of quarrels, but forget that all suitability is a long-term run-in and mutual change under the immersion of love.
Compared with the natural perfect match with a small probability, this kind of mutual run-in is really more exciting.
What exactly is suitable?
I remembered a passage I once read, and it may be called the best annotation.
The so-called fit is that two people together are like tomatoes and potatoes, and the perfect match is not potatoes and tomatoes, but potatoes become fries, tomatoes become tomato sauce, and so on.
Their respective postures and attributes are constantly changing, but the result is just right, and then in the day-to-day run-in, it advances to the most indestructible and long-lasting love.
Of course, the run-in mentioned here is by no means a unilateral compromise or sacrifice, but two people can reflect on themselves in the quarrel, actively seek balance in the contradiction, and grow in the endless trivialities.
We walked through the initial period of intense love together, sincerely hoping that when the filter of beauty fades, when true love begins to emerge, each other still wants to firmly go to the end.
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