He Suohuan, a writer of sexual affective psychology, writes love stories, interesting strangers, and material knowledge.
In fact, there is a "switch" in the relationship between people.
This switch can be understood as the "sense of proportion" in social interaction.
When you open it, chat with each other; When closed, two people should keep their distance and not disturb each other excessively.
When the switch is broken, it will have some impact on your relationship.
In socializing, some people can make deep friends; They are reliable, exquisite, and knowledgeable.
There are also some people who must not make deep friends, because they will not only consume your time and energy, but also drain your luck and money.
People who cannot have deep friendship generally have these characteristics.
-01
People who are deliberately close to you
Have you ever met such a person?
He seems to "play with anyone" and can be called brother and brother to anyone.
They are like "sea kings" in love, casting wide nets and fishing for big fish.
However, with such a person, you can feel his greasyness, his hypocrisy, his pretense and playfulness.
It got me thinking of an experience.
I remember it was my first job right out of college.
Meet a "Big Brother" colleague.
This big brother is very polite, and when he first came into contact, he felt that others were so good.
Take the initiative to teach you work, take the initiative to teach you some experience.
But then I found out that I was younger.
Before he quit, he borrowed 1,000 yuan from a few of our new colleagues, each of whom borrowed 1,000 yuan.
Privately, send messages one by one.
Little life experience, the first job, coupled with the feeling created by this "big brother", really treats you as a little brother.
The offer to borrow 1,000 yuan seemed acceptable to us who had just paid our salaries at that time.
After all, subconsciously think that he is a reliable person and will definitely return it.
Who knows, he resigned after borrowing money and blacklisted us all.
In fact, those who "deliberately approach you and treat you well" either ask for you or plot against you.
What kind of person is unreliable?
That is: people who have a good relationship with everyone, call everyone brothers and brothers, and hook up.
-02
The friendship is not deep, and there is a lot of trouble
In social interaction, it is common to meet such people:
I am not familiar with them, the relationship is not very good, at most it is "nodding friends".
However, they especially like to be "nosy".
Like what:
You sent a circle of friends, posted a dinner with friends, and he gave you a sour comment;
You do something, and he wants to point fingers at you;
Some of the results you get, he questions authenticity.
They always "brush presence" in front of you.
The friendship is not deep, but these people have a lot of trouble.
Psychology refers to such people as "gossip social friends."
They may not have a good relationship with you, but they are used to pointing fingers at you behind your back or in front of others.
In your face, say that others are bad;
In front of others, and say that you are not good.
If you encounter trouble, I will definitely think of you and trouble you for the first time;
What are the benefits, I can't wait to enjoy it secretly and not share it with anyone.
-03
Always jealous of you and hindering you
In fact, every friend around you will be jealous of you.
It's just that true friends, even if they are jealous of you, they will not show anything and do anything to hurt you.
Instead, they will be infected in your efforts, positive and hardworking, and then love their work and life and strive to get better.
What will unreliable people do?
They are always jealous of you and find ways to go against you and hinder your next success.
For example:
You feel fat and want to lose weight.
People who are jealous of you will hinder you from losing weight and pull you shopping and eating every day.
You have a job that is about to be turned in, and he will not only disturb your time, but even deliberately delete your archive, leaving you completely unable to complete it.
A post came to mind:
A boy drives a new car back to his hometown in the countryside, only to be jealous of his red-eyed neighbors.
Then at night, a neighbor sneaked up on his car.
But this neighbor did not expect that his car, with a real-time dashcam, recorded all this.
Be sure to stay away from the person who is "narrow-minded and always jealous of you."
They are never willing to bless you from the bottom of their hearts and be happy for you; Instead, they hide behind you and want to step on you when you fall.
-04
Not grateful and selfish
I shared a case earlier.
The boy's father died during childhood and his mother remarried.
Then this boy has lived with his aunt since he was 6 years old.
The living expenses, the tuition fees for studying, including the expenses of going to university, were all borne by the family of my aunt and uncle.
Finally, the boy graduated from college, went to work in a good company, and saved some money in just a few years.
As a result, his aunt was ill and hospitalized, and the operation was almost 100,000 yuan, and the boy only took out 20,000 yuan.
In fact, this boy has 200,000 in savings.
You say, is this ungrateful?
Whether a person is reliable or not does not mean how much money he has and how much he has ability; It is to see whether he values feelings and whether he knows Entu.
If there are people around you who "do not understand gratitude" and only think about their own selfishness in everything, you must stay away from him.
In this kind of person, no matter how much you give or what you have helped him, he will not remember your good.
Conversely, the longer you spend with them, the easier it is for you to lose.
Today's Topic:
Are there any of these types of people around you?
What kind of person do you think can't be deeply acquainted?
(Article with picture source network)