Children are disobedient, do not eat well, cannot sleep on time, do not consciously pack up toys, do not love to communicate, love to lose their temper....... There are too many headaches on the road to parenting, making it easy for parents to lose control of their emotions, yell, and exhausted, but with little effect. So, how to better communicate with children? How can I better guide my child's behavior? How can we have a warm and loving parent-child relationship?
Senior kindergarten teacher Teacher T gave the answer in his book "Child, I Know What You Think": Only by understanding children can we give children high-quality companionship.
The author, Mr. T, is a kindergarten male teacher with more than 10 years of experience, and he gives illustrated parenting tips for 3~12-year-old children in the cultivation of good habits, character development, emotional intelligence, children's independence, communication and expression, etc., which is a very practical tutoring manual.
For example, when a child can't eat well, Teacher T supports him like this:
1. Make use of the selfie app on your smartphone. Add cute little ears or fangs to your child's photo, give your child some characteristics of a small animal, and add language such as "you have become a rabbit eating turnips" to encourage your child to eat happily.
2. Collect your meal with your ticket. Write the name of the dish of the day on a sticky note and say to your child, "This is a meal ticket, give it to me to receive today's food."
3. "This is the legendary magic ××××", if the child is not interested in a certain food, try saying to the child, "I got the legendary "magic carrot", and enthusiastically observe the carrot with fresh soil with the child.
4. Try the game. If your child eats slowly or doesn't want to eat, try playing a "tasting session" game together. Divide the prepared food into one-quarter or one-sixth of the usual size and put it on a plate, and imitate the clerk at the tasting counter and ask the child, "Please taste it casually, would you like to eat a piece?" If it is delicious, you can eat another piece. ”
For example, when you are troubled by parent-child communication, you can try these methods provided by teacher T:
1. Play games with photos on your phone.
If the child is playing in the puddle and refuses to go home, you can first ask the child, "Will there be small fish in the puddle?" Then, pretending to look for small fish with the child, he took a picture of the puddle with his mobile phone, and then said: "Let's go home and look at the photos, let's look for it together."
2. "I'll do it for you together" can greatly mobilize your child's autonomy.
When you want your child to do something, replace the common phrase "please do this" with "I will help you do it together", which will make your child more conscious of action. Because this statement naturally expresses the fact that "the child is the person responsible for things", let the child's cognition change from "forced to do" to "this is my duty".
3. Switch to gentle and specific expressions.
Often saying things like "you have to be obedient" to children often puts strong pressure on them, making them feel "terrible" easily, and children will be at a loss. Instead, use a gentle and specific way to say to your child, "What can you do?" ”
4. Clearly convey to your child the joy of "I'm so happy that you did this."
If you want your child to do something, it's best to express it with "I" rather than "you," because it's easier for them to act. For example, "How long are you going to play?" Hurry up and clean up" changed the phrase to, "Because I want to put the meal on the table, so if you can clean up the toys, I'll be happy". Let the child realize that doing so will make his favorite parents happy, and he will take the initiative.
Teacher T provides as many as 133 parenting tips in "Child, I Know What You Think", these parenting tips are like a tip, no matter what age the child is at now, as long as it is for specific problems, you can directly flip through to find the corresponding multiple reference methods.
Moreover, these experiences and knowledge have a common point, that is, "let the child automatically spontaneity", that is, stimulate the child's internal drive, and exert the child's autonomy. As a parent, when you want your child to do something in the future, use your brain to make your child spontaneously feel that doing these things is "too fun". Then it all fell into place.
#从今天起记录我的2023 #