Shu Chang, who has not appeared in film and television works for a long time, has recently been ridiculed for frequently overturning the car when he brings goods live.
As a child star debut, she has participated in many large-scale TV series at the age of 15 and is well-known, and should have been the top of film and television, but in recent years, she has always played supporting roles in some dramas.
Even participated in the variety show "The Birth of an Actor", which was unexpected.
Countless netizens felt sorry for her, and called out "too indisputable" in the message! ", but Shu Chang still insists on self-selection without wavering.
What kind of thinking can she bring us from her life story?
From household name to obscurity,
What happened to her?
When Shu Chang was 5 years old, because of a photo hanging in the photo studio, he was discovered by the director and entered the group to shoot a scene.
While other children enjoy their childhood, Shu Chang has starred in several TV series and movies in succession, supporting his family and becoming a well-known child star.
She has played important roles in many films and televisions such as "Golden Powder Family", "Live a Good Life", "Lian cheng tips", "The Secret History of Xiaozhuang" and so on, and easily won the Best TV Rookie Award.
In "Tianlong Babu", she is only 16 years old, and with her own intelligence and understanding, she played the role of Tianshan Tong yao into three points, which was unanimously praised.
In addition to dazzling film and television achievements, Shu Chang has also released music albums, hosted popular TV programs, and his acting career can be described as a full bloom.
With the continuous improvement of ratings, Shu Chang completely became red, and she ushered in the peak of her career at the age of 20.
After that, because the agency was unprofessional, her family participated in her career development, and the comfortable star path began to take a sharp turn, often in a state of no drama to shoot.
Venus once commented: "Shu Chang is not self-motivated, his acting skills are very good but not hot." Other female stars often take pictures of beautiful pictures and hair dynamics, and she draws all day and practices calligraphy. ”
Indeed, Shu Chang does not focus on his filming career, but often travels abroad to study, study for graduate school, read books, and paint.
When she wanted to return, she found that the entertainment industry at this time was already another world of newcomers.
Fortunately, Shu Chang has a good attitude towards this:
"An actor's popularity is not something he can decide and choose, I can still understand this matter correctly, and my job is to play every role well."
And she chose to live stream with goods, but also based on the consideration of life, can seriously complete the work at the same time, but also have accompanied more than twenty years of fans, she feels satisfied and happy.
Shu Chang said: "In the past, I would pursue perfection more, but now, I am more receptive to my imperfect self." Accept your own shortcomings, and at the same time love yourself more, and be true to yourself. ”
There is no fixed script in life, and taking any path is just a choice.
But everyone's choice actually has an inner radius - it is called a "safe island".
Safety island, affecting important choices in life
What is an inner safe island?
Psychologically, this means that the love, stability, and recognition we feel in our original families will build an island of safety in our hearts.
When the higher the sense of love and security, the more it can support us to bravely pursue the connection with the world;
Conversely, an unfortunate childhood can severely erode the scope of the island, allowing us to choose a relatively comfortable and safe direction.
There is nothing wrong with this, but it is difficult to break through in life.
Safety Island is like a yardstick, and subconsciously, we try not to break through it by what we do.
Looking at Shu Chang's career, she can find that every choice she makes in her life is to put herself in a relatively safe and thoughtful environment.
The reason for this is that you can look back at her original family.
Shu Chang, who became famous as a teenager, actually had a very unfortunate childhood.
In 1987, Shu Chang was born in an ordinary family in Jilin Province, and when he was 5 months old, his parents divorced.
Her mother, who had been strong all her life, took her alone from Dalian to beijing to live, and there was no contact between her family and family.
The mother and daughter live in the basement of eight square meters, and life is difficult.
When she went out to work, her mother often locked Shu Chang at home, she often felt afraid, and perhaps from this time on, her inner island of safety was squeezed and reduced by fear and uneasiness.
Later, Shu Chang was discovered and filmed, and saw that the mother and daughter were about to live a good life, but her mother fell ill and died when she was ten years old.
At this point, Shu Chang became a child without a father and a mother, and could only live in the house of his aunt and uncle.
All this made Shu Chang's heart extremely broken, and she, who was already insecure, instantly collapsed in half.
For children, the biggest disaster is "abandonment".
And the parents divorced, displaced, lonely little black house, the mother died, living in a relative's house, all told Shu Chang:
She was a child who had been completely abandoned by fate.
Therefore, Shu Chang has learned from a young age that every choice he makes must think of a way out for life.
During the college entrance examination, she very firmly gave up the Chinese opera that was originally scheduled to be admitted and chose to study in the English Department of the North Second Foreign Language.
When asked why, she said: "If you don't have food to eat after filming, you can still rely on professionalism to leave a way back for yourself." ”
Because of the insecurity in his heart, Shu Chang did not dare to put the bet of life on filming.
She knew that there was no one to rely on in the back, and she could only take care of herself as much as possible.
In addition, insecure people are also easy to please others and will not refuse, so her mantra is always: "Good." ”
A comfortable life is like a compass without a fixed point, because without a stable and strong heart, you can't draw a consummation.
In life, there are many people who are repeatedly struggling, is it to stay in their comfort zone? Or break through yourself, get out of the safe island, and explore the wider world?
In fact, there is no standard answer to this question.
Because whatever you do, it's just a choice based on the scope of the inner safe island.
If you can feel satisfied and stable in a safe island, then choose to follow your heart;
If you feel that the scope of your safe island can continue to expand outwards, and you have enough strength to support it, you can try to take a step forward and break through upwards.
Step out of the "painting the ground as a prison" and start again
Dear, no one's growth can be smooth, the original family and past experience will certainly affect us, but we can also rebuild the inner safe island and get out of the dilemma of "painting the ground as a prison" in life.
First, find a safe and comfortable space, be quiet, listen to yourself, and rebuild inner stability and balance.
Try to adjust your breathing, do some soothing stretching, relax your body, let the thoughts in your heart, whether good or bad, let it come and go freely, and let the heart settle down a little bit.
Every life is conceived from a stable and calm environment, as does healing and change.
You can choose a fixed scene, repeat and intensify this stabilizing behavior, and imagine this scene as your own secret safe space.
Through continuous practice, let yourself become more and more calm and stable.
Second, try to focus on your own autonomy and attention, and build a positive and powerful self-image.
When people are confused, it is very easy to fall into the rumination of past trauma and the fear of the future.
Forget about unhappy experiences for a while, draw your attention back to the present moment, and pay close attention to the abilities, strengths, and potentials you have.
By thinking back to the things you did well in your past life, and changing your self-image perception, you will find:
It turns out that you are not so helpless and vulnerable, even very strong.
Keep strengthening this sense of strength within you until you feel like you've become purely passionate, fearless, as if you've never been hurt in the first place.
Only when you are so strong and confident can you have the strength to explore more new possibilities.
Finally, learn to accept yourself, accept others (parents, partners), reconcile with the past, and expand the scope of your psychological safety.
Accepting yourself is not about completely formatting the past and removing it from memory. It's about trying not to fight the pain of the past, to admit that it once existed, and to let it stay there naturally.
Instead of dwelling on the pain of the past, you can pull out and look down on how small a place you were trapped in.
At this time, our inner island of safety is also unconsciously expanding its scope, and we can continue to accumulate strength to touch the wider sky.
One day, we will be able to shake hands with ourselves and the world with a calm mind.
At that time, we will find that the so-called happiness and perfection is not a certain end, but a road, a road of continuous exploration and self-transcendence.
Planning | Six notes
Edit | Fish sweet