On Monday afternoon, at an apartment on Chicago's Gold Coast, police officers hurriedly knocked outside the door.
A man with a gun stood in the apartment, he had just killed his ex-wife, and now the body was near the door, just a door away from the police outside.
She was no longer breathing, blood was flowing from the back of her head, and the blood had dried up.
Hearing the police knock at the door, the man immediately raised his gun and pointed it at his head.
The police heard only one gunshot outside the door, followed by the man's groans of pain.
They did not dare to delay any longer, and immediately broke through the door, and the first thing that came into sight was the corpse of the woman, who had been shot in the back of the head.
The police found the man who committed suicide after the murder in the bedroom, at this time he was still breathing, but the head injury was serious, and the police immediately took him to the hospital.
He was pronounced dead in hospital.
A number of foreign media reported on the suicide case after the murder, and many people have automatically substituted for "emotional disputes" when they see their ex-husbands and ex-wives, but the facts are much more tragic.
This woman, who died tragically under her ex-husband's gun, is the epitome of countless women who have been imprisoned by South Asian society and culture.
She grew up in an environment that required girls to strictly suppress themselves;
Dressed "indecently" and will be scolded as a prostitute;
The family of origin could not give her emotional support, only discipline and PUA;
She is caught up in an emotionally abusive relationship and no one will let her divorce;
Because the South Asian community feels that "divorced women are losers";
She was bitterly divorced and became a "scum" in the eyes of relatives and friends;
Her family forbade her to return home, and if she returned, they committed suicide;
She recorded her divorce journey, the video was fired but was "educated" by her family in public, and she should not show her face;
She rejected and stayed away from all the negative factors, moved to another city to bravely pursue her dreams, and completely cut off her original family, terrible ex-husband, and oppressive environment, and lived herself.
But all her efforts were easily destroyed by her ex-husband, and her life stopped at the age of 29, at the moment when she thought she could finally start living her life again.
Her name is Sania Khan, a Pakistani-American professional photographer who grew up with her family in Tennessee and grew up in a more conservative South Asian community.
Her original family and relatives are subtly making her a "traditional good girl", not following the rules, dressing inconspicuously, keeping to herself, marrying and having children when she grows up, just like this for a lifetime.
No matter what happens behind the door, you must maintain the appearance of a family, even if the husband and wife have not been in harmony for a long time.
Her father ignored her, her mother was harsh on her, and even though she was almost 30 years old, she was still afraid of her mother from the bottom of her heart.
This makes her only a "two-faced person" even if she yearns for freedom, a well-behaved girl in front of her parents, and can only be herself outside.
She was very fond of photography, and in college she majored in psychology and women's studies while starting her own photography career.
After graduation, she worked as a flight attendant because she also loved to travel, and she was able to save money to support herself to "become a travel photographer", killing two birds with one stone.
She developed her photography career well and eventually worked as a full-time photographer to fulfill her dreams.
Every photo she takes captures sweetness and happiness, as she often photographs weddings, couples, and couples.
I can really feel the love flowing between the subjects from her photos.
Her own relationship did not go well, perhaps because of the long-indoctrinated concepts of "find a man to take care of you" and "the most important thing for a woman in this life is to find the right man", she and 36-year-old Raheel Ahmed met and fell in love.
But she stepped into the trap, and for 6 years, she thought she had found someone she could trust for life. The concept of "women want to start a family" makes her ignore the red flags that this man shows from the beginning of the relationship, such as subtly suppressing and PUA her.
The ex-husband suffers from bipolar disorder but does not go to treatment, he alienates her from his family and isolates her from a familiar environment.
They were still married, and after marriage, perhaps her husband felt that she had nowhere to go, and gradually revealed her true face unscrupulously, breaking her bottom line little by little, from mental abuse to physical violence, Sarnia's body was full of scars.
According to Sarnia's friend, "He once tried to commit suicide, trying to jump out of their 20th-story apartment window and take Sarnia with him." ”
In less than a year, Sarnia couldn't stand it and wanted a divorce.
But divorce, in the eyes of the entire South Asian community, is a shameful and undignified thing, especially for women.
Sarnia's mother had been warned by an aunt that if she divorced Sarnia's father, she would be excluded and isolated by everyone in the community, all her relatives and friends.
People are often difficult to withstand this huge group pressure, especially women who have been disciplined all their lives.
But Sarnia didn't want to give in.
On the contrary, she wants to take this opportunity to completely and unreservedly tear off the shackles that suffocate her, and make a final cut with her original family and toxic ex-husband.
At the age of 28, Sarnia married, divorced, and moved from a conservative town to the big city of Chicago.
This year, she almost died.
It was also the year that she was reborn.
She can finally put all her energy into herself and her dreams, and no longer have to worry about her family cursing prostitutes when they see her clothes;
Stop worrying that they'll force themselves into a toxic marriage just because of "other people's opinions";
No need to worry about having a toxic husband who makes her feel humble and worthless all the time...
She's finally happy!
After her divorce in May this year, she sent a video to express her happy mood, which read: "This new chapter in my life is called: To play me!" ”
After that, she began to update her post-divorce situation and the change of mentality along the way.
There is the joy, relief and freedom of regaining a new life, and there is also the pain of stripping away the original environment and marriage.
These pains were gradually smoothed out by time, leaving her with only happiness.
Her videos have also gained the support of many netizens, because many women have similar experiences with her, and her account has gradually become popular, and each video has almost hundreds of thousands of views.
This, in turn, annoyed conservative South Asian families.
Instead of rejoicing in her success, they saw it as a shame because she was too "out of the ordinary."
Her family took her to a coffee shop and constantly "educated" her not to "show her family ugliness".
In the values of South Asian families, women should be silent, cautious in words and deeds, and should not say too much, let alone disclose their divorce experiences, or even "criticize" marriage.
Obviously, this only allows women to continue to be trapped in a masochistic environment, suffering in silence.
Sarnia was fed up with all this suffocating, an environment that disciplined women all the time, and made her almost breathless.
But more than twenty years of brainwashing indoctrination could not be erased all the time, and Sarnia left decisively, but sometimes she still couldn't help but wonder if she had failed too much, almost to the point of rebellion.
But fortunately, she understands that her choice is the right one, the best choice for herself.
She also knew how great everything she did was.
"Sometimes when I feel uncomfortable, I think that if I knew that I would become such a powerful woman in the future, how proud I would be when I was a child."
I pursued my dream, became a photographer, and became the most confident version of myself, putting myself first, not a man. ”
Even people who don't know her, read her post after the divorce, and can't help but be excited for her, because every step can be seen, her state is getting better and better, and everything is developing in a good direction.
And it's clear that she'll be better off in the future, after all, she's only 29 years old, and a great future awaits her.
Until the ex-husband stood outside her door with a gun and ended it all with a gunshot.
A few days ago, my ex-husband, who lives in Georgia, suddenly appeared in Chicago and went straight to the apartment to find Sarnia, who he said was here to "save the marriage" but came with a gun.
The man ruined Sarnia's life and then ruined her future.
She struggled for so long, suffered, transformed, awakened, so hard to live as a "human" posture, unconstrained, free to live, but just because of this gunshot suddenly stopped.
The end came too simplistically, and it hardly really came to be true.
Many netizens who followed Sarnia could not accept this matter, and they rushed to Saniya's social platform to leave a message and watched the videos recorded after her divorce again.
In one of the videos, she imagines her own happy life in other parallel universes.
"If the multiverse really existed, I wish there would be a universe where my parents weren't separated.
We'll also go on family road trips together and listen to old Bollywood songs together.
We would go to ice cream together when Dad was off work.
My siblings and I would jump on the trampoline of a neighbor's house during the summer holidays.
Our parents don't argue in front of us.
When they bathe us, they will bring love, gentle words, and warm hugs.
Our dad would treat mom with love and respect, the love and respect she always deserved. ”
Her lifelong struggles have come from her original family, but she still pins all the good hopes on her family.
If there really is a parallel universe, hopefully she has gotten there.
As for the present world that makes her miserable, the root of the suffering comes from the entire feudal environment, which has cultivated a man with toxic masculinity like Sarnia's ex-husband, cultivated an extremely conservative community that cares about the eyes of others, and cultivated women who are imprisoned and bound and cannot escape.
And such a consequence is one tragedy after another.
If such communities do not change their minds and attitudes toward women and men, the tragedy will repeat itself again and again.