Friends who are willing to help you often embarrass you

01

The Book of Rites reads: "Whoever learns the way, the strict teacher is embarrassed." ”

In society, it is easy to make fox friends and dog friends, but it is difficult to meet good teachers and friends.

Moreover, many people like to be shunshui people, do not like to send charcoal in the snow, no matter what happens, they hope to be "hello, I am good, everyone is good" ending.

Truly intelligent people know how to "do the opposite", can think backwards, and see the essence through phenomena.

Therefore, friends who sincerely help you will often embarrass you, let you taste the sweetness after suffering, and see human nature clearly in the midst of life's downfall.

02

People who always go along with your wishes are mostly hypocrites.

As the saying goes: "Exposing people does not expose shortcomings, and hitting people does not hit their faces." ”

When interpersonal communication, we have the best face, afraid of confronting others and refuting the face of others; we are also worried that others will not be accustomed to ourselves and do things that make us unable to step down.

Whether someone else is doing it right or wrong, give him a thumbs up and leave a few flattering words, there is always nothing wrong with it.

I once saw a joke: a rich man invited relatives and friends to come to his house for dinner. At the time of eating, the rich man let go of a fart, and the smell gradually dissipated.

A friend said, "Rich man Grandpa, you fart, it's so fragrant." ”

The people next to them also echoed, and they all smelled the aroma.

The rich man was suddenly very sad, because he heard an old Chinese medicine doctor say that if the fart is fragrant, it is the foci of the disease, and it will be bitter in the future.

The friend had a clever move: "Ah, just now, the smell has changed, a little smelly." ”

The person next to him saw the wind making the rudder and said, "Stinky, stinky, stinkier than shit." ”

Flattery can be seen anytime, anywhere, but beware.

The people who always praise you are actually the people who come to harm you. After careful analysis, you will understand: they have asked for you and want to win you over; they are your subordinates, and they are afraid of you; they want to paralyze you and pull you into the water; they like you, they love You, they love You, and they laugh at you while fooling you.

Even if your parents, if they have always loved you and demanded "everything they want", then they will eventually harm you, making you a giant baby in society and losing the ability to make a living.

A great man once said, "Cheating on friendship is painful trauma, and hypocritical sympathy is a sharp poison arrow." ”

If you are too comfortable, you must wake up in time to see what he is coveting, and then alienate him, do not be crushed by sugar-coated shells in his life.

03

The person who is difficult for you is the noble person on the road of life.

When you meet someone who is difficult for you, your first reaction is that he is your nemesis and has no good heart.

In fact, you should learn to "classify", some people are embarrassed by looking down on you; some people directly point out your shortcomings because they want to help you; some people expect your prodigal son to turn back and poke your weak ribs fiercely; some people spur you to grow and whip you with a whip...

During the Qin Dynasty, there was a man named Zhang Liang, whose grandfather and father were both prime ministers of Korea during the Warring States period. Therefore, he was bent on overthrowing Qin Shi Huang and restoring Korea.

When Qin Shi Huang inspected the people's sentiments, Zhang Liang ambushed in a place called Bolangsha and attacked Qin Shi Huang, but he did not succeed and became a fleeing person. In order to save his life, Zhang Liang hid his name and lived a long and lingering life in the countryside.

One day, Zhang Liang passed by the bridge and met an old man. The old man deliberately threw his shoes under the bridge and said, "Eh, young man, help me pick up my shoes." ”

Zhang Liang held his breath and picked up his shoes.

The old man said, "Help me put on my shoes." ”

Just as the old man turned to leave, he said, "At dawn in five days, please wait for me on the bridge." ”

Later, the old man taught Zhang Liang the "Taigong Transformation Method". After Zhang Liang's studies, he helped Liu Bang defeat Qin II, defeat Xiang Yu, and became the founding hero of the Western Han Dynasty.

There is a saying in the "Art of War of taigong": "The bird will strike, and the low flying wings; the beast will fight, and the ear will be ambushed; the saint will move, and there will be foolishness." ”

Birds that can spread their wings and fly high are at first to converge their wings, before the beast wants to run, it will bow its head and charge, and the shrewd person is stupid before it wants to act.

That is to say, if a person wants to become a great instrument, he must have experiences such as humility, convergence, accumulation of strength, and enduring humiliation and burden. How much suffering you have suffered, how big a career you can make.

Understand that people who are willing to help you see through the development trend of life, so they force you to suffer, and they will even hurt you.

Usually, the person who helps you will make these moves: force you to learn; teach you the truth of being a person; change the direction of your life; speak against your ears; stimulate your fighting spirit...

The Qing Dynasty poet Shen Jinsi said: "If the grass and trees do not undergo frost and snow, the business will not be solid; if our people do not suffer from sorrow, virtue and wisdom will not succeed." ”

When you regard suffering as wealth, you will find that the most wonderful life is the blossoming flowers in the barren land, and the vigorous weed in the swamp.

04

I have seen such a sentence: "Good heart is treated as a donkey's liver and lungs." ”

Many people, mixed in society, can't tell the difference between "which is right and wrong", thinking that the people who eat and drink together and brag hard are friends, and when they encounter things later, please eat a meal to solve it.

Until one day, you are very depressed, former friends, pull them to dinner, do not come, you suddenly woke up - hypocritical socialization, do not stop.

From now on, we must keep in mind a rule of dating - only by accepting "embarrassment" can we grow.

Life will never be smooth sailing, there is no 100% fairness and justice in the world, if a person has been addicted to the greenhouse, then he will walk out of the greenhouse, he will be burned by the sun, blown down by the cold wind, and troubled by human feelings.

Only those who grow up in adversity can really have a smooth sailing. Those who are embarrassed by you are actually creating adversity, so that when you are young, you will suffer more and endure more wind and rain.

Emerson said, "Adversity has a scientific value." A good scholar will not give up this opportunity to learn. ”

May you and I walk with those who are embarrassed by ourselves, away from false praise and false help.

Author: Cloth coarse food.

Follow my words and go into your heart.

The illustrations in this article come from the Internet.