China is known as the "state of etiquette", the so-called "state law, the family has the family rules; there are no rules, no squares." “
The word "rules" is also quite meaningful. To the left of the word "rule" is "fu", to the left of the word "moment" is "ya", and "fu" and "ya" are both pictographic "arrows". With "arrow" set aside, the meaning is very clear. Arrows naturally have a direction, a goal, a standard, and the direction must be correct, the goal must be accurate, in order to be "unswerving."
To the right of the word "rule" is "see", which together is a standing person with exaggerated eyes on his head, indicating that he is watching and supervising. To the right of the word "moment" is "giant", that is, a person holding a measuring tool in a measurement operation.
Chinese characters seek meaning by form, and the two words of rules are originally meant to be tools for "becoming" square circles, and by extension, it is meaningful to say that rules are all based on application and practice. This refers to laws, norms, and standards, that is, the boundaries and constraints of behavior that everyone must abide by.
Since childhood, our parents have taught us to understand the rules, such as the rules for adults to talk to children not to interject; when they see teachers at school, they must understand the rules and call "teachers are good" first; they must understand the rules of the mall after coming out to work; when they are parents, they must also teach their children to learn the rules...
Mr. Zhang Dainian once said, "A person who knows very little about the history and culture of his own nation lacks a sense of belonging spiritually; a nation that does not know how to inherit and carry forward its own traditions cannot stand on its own feet among the nations of the world." ”
No matter how the times change, there are some old rules handed down by the ancestors, and we cannot lose them.
1. For the Son of Man not to rise (late), the clothes are sorted out by himself, and the morning and dusk must be saved.
2. The Son of Man is not seated in the middle of the seat, and he is not in the middle of the way.
3. The Son of Man shall be told, and the opposite shall be faced.
4. Elders and things must be received with both hands.
5. After Xu Xing, he is long, and he is not rushed to be long.
6. The elderly shall not sit, but the elderly shall stand up.
7. Don't pace around in front of the elderly seat.
8. Do not stand in the middle of the door, and do not violate the threshold when passing through the door.
9. Do not sigh when eating, and do not reprimand children.
10. Eat at the same table without preparing a separate meal.
11. Don't be picky about the beauty and evil of food.
12. Sit, stand, and walk as if sitting is like a bell, standing like a pine, walking like the wind, and lying like a bow. Stand without a foot limp, sit without spreading your feet like a jig, sleep without lying down, and lie on your right like a bow.
13. The crown should not be beautiful, but neat.
14. When you see the elders, you will pay homage.
15. Ascend without shouting, without pointing, without greeting.
16. Do not smoke, chew food, or sing on the road.
17. Those who see the elderly on the bus must get off, and those who see the young must bow their heads.
18. He shall return home at night, and if he is unable to return because of anything, he shall first tell his family.
19. Cars and horses are crowded and rushing to the area, and no salute is greeted.
20. Don't stand on the road and talk for a long time.
21. If you do not take the middle of the road, you must first see clearly to the left and right, and you must not compete with the car.
22. When walking, walk steadily, open your chest and close your mouth, and look forward.
23. When women are old and weak, they should give way first.
24. When a person asks for directions on the way, he shall give instructions in detail, and if he asks for directions, he shall immediately thank him.
25. One person does not enter the ancient temple, and two people do not look at the deep well.
26. Dismount first at the bridge, and the transition is not a dispute.
27. On a boat or plane, do not probe or reach out of the window, and do not spit casually.
28. When raising and lowering the national flag and singing the national anthem or school anthem, stand solemnly and show respect.
29. When the teacher goes to and from class, he stands up and salutes.
30. Question the division commander and ask questions, and stand up.
31. When you meet the division commander on the road, you will pay tribute to the side of the road.
32. When listening to the lecture, sit upright or upright; do not bow down, bend over, and bend your feet.
33. When taking the exam, do not turn your head to ear, or look left and right.
34. Be at ease with his learning and be close to his teachers, and enjoy his friends and believe in his ways.
35. There is an order of seats, and the elders must be seated.
36. Do not cross the humerus or extend your feet after taking your seat.
37. The Lord first raised a glass to his guests, and the guests gave a message of thanks.
38. The host himself cooks, and the host must be thanked for the after-eating.
39. Raise up the spoon, and ask everyone to hold it up together.
40. After the host toasts, the guest must return the favor. When giving a toast, your own glass must be lower than the other person's. It is not allowed to pour water or wine with the backhand.
41. With a spoon, those who are only on one side of themselves do not stand up and take the dish from the corner vessel.
42. Spoon do not take the soup from the top of the dish.
43. The vessel of public food shall not be stirred by oneself.
44. Drain the spoon and drain before re-entering the tableware.
45. The dishes in one's own bowl shall not be returned to the vessel.
46. Spoons take dishes that are no less than others.
47. Do not ring your tongue when you eat, and do not ring your throat in your throat. Can't spit on it, drink soup can't suck.
48. Ask someone if they want to add food, and you can't say "ask for food".
49. You can't play with your phone while eating, and if you cough, you will turn around and turn backwards.
50. Do not throw bones at dogs.
51. Leave no rice grains in the bowl.
52. Do not culling people's teeth.
53. The host does not start before the guest food is finished.
54. At the beginning of the table, the Lord was slow to speak and thanked him.
55. After the feast, the host enters the towel and enters the tea. When serving a rice bowl with a teacup, be sure to hold the side or bottom edge with both hands, and cannot hold the teacup or bowl edge from the upper finger with five fingers apart.
56. If you must speak at meals, avoid spitting into the apparatus and avoid saying obscure words.
57. Some children are pampered by the elderly and can sit next to the elderly, but the seats cannot be higher than the elders.
58. When eating fish, you cannot say "turn over": the fish should be turned upside down from the beginning, called "U-turn".
59. Do not knock on dishes with chopsticks, and chopsticks cannot be inserted in rice.
60. When eating, you should have both hands on the table, hold the bowl with your hands, and do not eat and bite chopsticks. Do not eat with a chopstick.
61. The person who meets for the first time asks for his surname, the noble surname, the name, the Name. Self-proclaimed surname yue surname so-and-so, said name known as cursive character so-and-so.
62. Those who have relatives shall be commensurate with each other in their own names. Ordinary people call themselves Mr. Yue or a certain brother, and call themselves Brother Yue. The elderly, called Mr. Old, call themselves Houxue, or self-names.
63. The father of the man is called Lingzun, and the mother is called Lingtang. To people call themselves their parents, to know the family strictly, to know the family kindness. See the father of a friend, called the old uncle, the mother called the aunt, called herself a late or nephew.
64. The ancestor of the people, the ancestor of Ling, and the grandmother of Mrs. Lingzu. To people call themselves the ancestors of the ancestors. Grandmother is known as the grandmother. See people's grandfathers and grandmothers, called too old uncles, too aunts. Just call yourself by your own name.
65. Call a brother of man, a brother of order, a brother of order. To people call themselves brothers, brothers and brothers. Called the sister of the people, known as the sister of the Ling Ling. She is called a sister to others, and is known as a sister of the family. See the brother of the man, called a few mr., or a few brothers, call themselves the little brother. Sisters who see people, collectively known as several sisters, call themselves little brothers. (The book is called a waiter)
66. To call one's wife, to be called Lady Lingzheng or Lady Zun, to be called one's own wife, to be humble or to be a lowly person. When he saw a man's wife, he called himself a sister-in-law and called himself his own name. (A woman can call herself a sister)
67. A woman is called a husband of a man, a certain gentleman of the ZunFu, and a husband to a man, a grandson. If you see someone's husband call mr. so as to avoid being called a good one, if necessary, just call yourself.
68. Call the son of man, linglang or gongzi, call the woman of man ling ai, or the princess of the woman. Call people zizi, little child, female little girl. See the son of man called shi brother, call himself brother, call herself a female shi jie, and do not call herself.
69. The grandson and granddaughter of the person shall be called the grandson of the emperor, and the grandson of the order shall be the grandson of the daughter. He is called a grandson, and a female grandson, a little grandson, a little granddaughter. See people's grandchildren and female grandchildren, called a few sons and a few misses.
70. To refer to a person or to refer to one's deceased superior, a preceding word shall be added. For example, if you call the deceased parents of a person, you will be called the wife of the Ling Ancestor, and you will be called the deceased parents of the self, and you will be called strict and kind. It is not necessary to add another word to call a deceased person, only to cloud "former brother", to call the deceased next generation, but to add a dead word, or cloud "before so-and-so" can also be.
71. Call the aunt and aunt of the people, and call the aunt of the uncle of the person, and the aunt of the uncle of the order. To people called self-uncle aunt, known as the family aunt aunt. The aunt and aunt who see people are called old gentlemen and old ladies, and those who are generous can be called old uncles and old aunts.
72. Call one's uncle and aunt a man, and call him a mother and uncle and an uncle. He is known as his uncle and aunt, and he is known as his aunt and uncle. See the uncle and aunt of the people, the title is imitation of the former.
73. The father-in-law and mother-in-law of the people are called the fathers-in-law and mothers-in-law of the people. To people called in-laws parents-in-law, known as the mother-in-law of the family. See the parents-in-law of the people, the title imitates the former.
74. To call a nephew within a person, to be called a nephew within an order. Called the nephew of a man, known as the nephew of Ling. He is called a son-in-law of a man, and he is known as a son-in-law. To people called from the inner nephew, nephew, son-in-law, yue inner nephew, yue she nephew, yue son-in-law.
75. Call one's relatives and friends, and call one's relatives and friends. Calling oneself a relative or a friend, or giving up one's relatives and friends.
76. The master of the people, the master of the order, the master of the birth, the master of the order. He is called a self-teacher to others, and he is known as a master of our karma. He is called a self-born disciple. He calls himself a master, a master or a master. It is called self-acceptance, or protégé.
77. The chief of the people, known as the chief of the people, known as the chief of the nobles (the departments, departments, bureaus, etc.). Called a subordinate of a person, known as your subordinate or your subordinate. It is also possible to call oneself a subordinate, to call oneself a subordinate, to call one's colleague or our subordinate, and to call one of one's own surname and a certain position.
78. Call himself the master of man, call him noble, call him a servant, and honor him. To people called the autonomous person, known as the upper part of us; called self-servant, known as small price.
79. Gently slam the door outside the first place, and the owner will let the party in.
80. When there are other guests entering, the host must be polite for the introduction, and the same is true when resigning.
81. When entering the house and seeing another guest, do not sit for a long time; if there is a problem, ask the master to come to him and say it.
82. When you see another visitor coming during a conversation, you resign.
83. Sit upright, do not listen, do not laugh.
84. Do not bring all animals to church.
85. Letters and documents in the master's room shall not be taken.
86. The answer to the conversation must be taken care of.
87. The church will be heard, and the voice will be heard.
88. The door is opened and the door is closed; those who are latecomers are closed and not allowed to do so.
89. The master owes an extension, or looks at a clock, he must resign.
90. No visitors during meals and sleep.
91. The Chief of the Jin Dynasty shall bow and salute before taking his seat; and so shall he retire.
92. When shaking hands with the Chief, the Chief, and the woman, they should first stretch out their hands and then shake them respectfully.
93. Visiting Catholics must first ask them how many hours they work, and should not sit still and gossip for a long time.
94. Visitors do not encounter, or leave a film, or write on a message board.
95. Greetings from the first, greetings from familiar guests, and addressed by the surname of the guest.
96. And the door first, for the guest to open the door.
97. Every door must be given to the guest first.
98. Entry must be a guest seat.
99. The tea fruit grows first, then the youngest, and the gentleman ripens later.
100. If there are other guests in the room, they should be introduced, first of all, the young is the long, the inferior is the respectable, the near is far, and the same lun is the front and the back.
101. The master shall get down from his seat and raise a cup of tea.
102. Guests must send tributes, and distant guests must be sent outside the village or at the intersection.
103. When visitors from afar come, they must prepare a food and drinking room, a toilet guide, and a bath guide.
104. When a visitor from afar goes, he will be sent to the station, and he will look forward to the car driving far away and returning.
105. Etiquette is not reciprocal, coming and going, coming and going, coming and not coming, and it is not polite.
106. The giver does not know what he wants, nor does he ask what he wants.
107. Gifts must be humble and respectful.
108. Gifts must be wrapped on the outside, except for weddings and funerals.
109. Ordinary gifts, seated with other guests, must avoid watching and listening, and do not avoid coming from afar and meeting for the first time.
110. After receiving the gift, a little humility is given, and then a thank you is given, and you must pray for a few days.
111. The elders give it, and they dare not resign.
112. Clocks and watches should not be sent. There is a meaning of sending the end, which is not auspicious.
113. It is not advisable to send candles, which are sacrificial items.
114. Attend the auspicious ceremony, do not talk about mourning, do not look at each other, do not cry.
115. Funerals do not participate in auspicious ceremonies, but only gifts.
116. Funeral dress does not enter the public gate, and does not observe auspicious ceremonies.
117. The wedding is in front of the guests, and the resignation is not humorous.
118. Don't smile at the end of the day.
119. There are funerals, not lane songs.
120. Food is eaten in the bereaved, and wine is not ochre.
121. Whoever wears a burial badge shall be removed at the end of the ceremony and shall not be worn with him.
122. When he will go far, he will resign from his relatives and friends, and he will worship his ancestors and resign from his relatives.
123. When you go to your destination, you must first visit the person concerned.
124. When you return, you must pay homage to your relatives and friends, or give away a little earth.
125. Relatives and friends who have traveled far away shall send them off, either as gifts or feasts beforehand.
126. Visitors from afar must pray or set up a feast to receive the wind.
127. When a traveler returns to worship, he must return to worship or set up a feast to wash the dust.
128. The send-off and farewell of the recipients shall be thanked by letter one by one when they reach their place of residence.
129. A person who has received the wind or washed the dust must return to the table.
130. Entry is forbidden, entry is customary, and entry is forbidden.
131. If you do not enter the country, you must get off the horse when you enter the village.
132. Others are talking, not interjecting in the middle.
133. Two people talk to each other and do not walk through the middle.
134. Disturb the audiovisuality of others by making noises without making noise.
135. Do not sit cross-legged, do not cross your legs, do not tip your feet.
136. Do not talk from one side to the other.
137. Sit behind the stool.
138. The hood shall not be imposed on the hood of another.
139. Do not spit water on people.
140. Do not yawn, stretch, sneeze.
141. No crossed legs, no squinting eyes.
142. No sleeves or legs.
143. Do not shake your legs.
144. When handing scissors to a person, do not allow the tip of the knife to be pointed at the person.
145. There is no shortness of the Tao, and no length of self-talk.
146. Do not speak to outsiders about family matters.
147. The mouth is the door to misfortune, and the words must be said after some consideration.
148. When you see the frustrated, you do not speak triumphantly; when you see the elderly, you do not speak of decay.
149. It is unspeakably deep to be shallow, and there is no evil sound in friendship.
150. Do not insult people, do not joke about people.
151. Meetings with persons with disabilities must be respectful.
152. Pick the peddler's coolie on your shoulders, and don't ask for a bargain.
153. Forgiveness shall be forgotten, and forgiveness shall be repaid; forgiveness shall be sought from man, and forgiveness shall be made to me.
154. The good should be close to him and must be respected for a long time; the wicked should be respected and far away.
155. Be calm when things are happening, and don't be reckless about what you can't do.
156. The melon field does not take care of the performance, and the plum does not complete the crown.
157 Whoever speaks out, faith comes first, deceit and delusion, and xi can be done.
158 Do not do unto others what you do not want.
159. Whoever asks for advice from others must make a door and ask.
160. Do not be selfish in what you have, and do not be contemptuous of what one can do.
Some people crudely regard these old rules as "stereotypes and bad habits". As the previous generation grew older, fewer and fewer young people today knew the "rules."
In fact, the old rule can be summed up in one word: etiquette. It is full of empathetic thinking of "pushing oneself and others" and the humanistic care of "correcting oneself and transforming oneself".
Take its essence, remove its dross. The old rules that have been handed down from generation to generation are both man-made and even more human. It doesn't just stay in books, nor is it only seen in museums. Real life is the biggest inheritance position of traditional culture.
Source: Global Archives