Great fatherly love is both strong and soft, and both praise and demeaning. It was harshness when lazy, hugs when crying, encouragement when cowardice, street lights in the night.
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Blossoms send affection Father's love dusty thoughts
Qingming is a season of mourning, although there is a gentle spring breeze, but it can not always warm the sad mood of the world. Therefore, people will light paper money and incense candles to pay affectionate tribute to the deceased ancestors, so as to dispel this sadness and let the relatives who are far away in heaven enjoy happiness and well-being.
In the Qingming Dynasty under the epidemic situation in 2022, people at home who fight against the epidemic have lit up their hearts in cyberspace and recalled their relatives in heaven. Sitting quietly on the couch, looking at the images of people in all directions on the phone, listening to the sad voiceover. The figure of my father in my memory gushed in my mind, and the kind father and subtle care turned into a gentle mourning, which made me write this reminiscence article.
His father was born in 1946 on the auspicious occasion of the auspicious month, and the turbulent years caused him to lose his father at the age of five. I grew up struggling to be pulled by my grandmother and older siblings. When he became an adult, he caught up with the liberation of New China, and was born in the old era and grew up in the new society, which made his father's life full of twists and turns. Under the care of grandma and uncle, he entered the school, reluctantly read some books and read a little word, and dropped out of school at home to help uncle and grandma run housework together in time for the Cultural Revolution. In his father's heart, he regarded his grandfather's eldest son and uncle as his father, and he respected him all his life. His younger brother and sister below him are also always concerned and do their best to help. This kind of brother-sister feeling of the fathers is worth inheriting and carrying forward by our descendants, and the years of suffering have made them understand the preciousness and pricelessness of family affection.
My father studied barefoot doctors for a few days while in the production team, but he didn't succeed in the middle of the way. Later, he inherited the mantle of his grandfather and became interested in Taoist culture by immersing himself in learning the art of learning from his teachers. Under the guidance of the master, he learned some traditional folk yishu crafts to alleviate disasters and worries for the people of the eight villages in ten miles. Under the control of his grandmother and uncle, he married the kind mother of the same village. After starting a family, we divided our families and gave birth to four of our sisters. Around 1980, in order to live, the family moved to the Jingdian tank area, and the mother leveled the field together, and when life just had a little bit of color, the bitter grandmother died and left us, and the sad father regretted that he had not fulfilled his filial piety. Not good at words, he became more and more respectful of his uncle. As the eldest son, the eldest uncle also cared for his younger siblings, and after relocating to the tank farm, the family's original mountain and dry sand cultivation, because of the long distance, he and his cousin helped cultivate. Every year in the autumn harvest of the mountainous areas, father and mother set off in the middle of the night with a mule cart, taking their brothers and sisters who had just become adults, and traveling a long way to the mountains and rivers to harvest crops. I remember that when my father was building a house in the tank farm, my uncle came down from the mountains with his relatives and friends to help, and did not return until the house was completed.
From an early age, his father, who lacked fatherly love, was introverted and unsociable. Only two distant uncles in the village who were about his age and one of his uncles were in close contact. In most cases, a strong mother bears the burden of the family. When encountering difficult things and unfair things in life, my father always tolerated it. I remember that year, after the eldest brother separated his family, he had to move to another village ten kilometers away, and the village cadres looked at his father honestly and wanted to take back the eldest brother's field. The father was worried that his eldest son would lose the security of his life after he moved over, and according to reason, there was no result, so he borrowed his uncle's bicycle and rushed to the father's house in the county town overnight to seek help. Then things were taken care of properly. My father often said that it was a blessing to suffer a loss, and that a person's loss would be made up by heaven. Once, there was a relative's family doing a marriage, and the family could not even get the only dollar to send love money, and the mother went to borrow money from a relative in the same village, and was said by the daughter of this relative. Stinging his father's self-esteem, he began to raise sheep, wind and rain, and drove the sheep to his hometown in the mountains and the Area of Wutong Mountain in the summer to graze and live in the wild. One night in the summer of that year, his father drove his flock to the deserted Tiger Ditch, encountered a group of sheep thieves, looking for a target in the ditch, in order to protect the breeding animals he relied on, the father quickly gathered more than 50 sheep on the edge of a rock cliff, and hid them in fear. The sheep that had accompanied their father for many years also seemed to be human, and none of them made a cry. After more than an hour, watching the figure of the thief gone, my father came back to his senses. He persisted until the second brother graduated from college, his family's situation improved slightly, and his age did not allow him to graze before he was willing to let go.
Experienced the cold and warm father, with his craft to heal the cries of many people's children, to resolve countless families struggling in suffering, never asking for returns, if he covets money and goods, he may also become a rich household, but he always abides by the Buddhist and Taoist rules, purifies all sentient beings, and saves people from suffering. Later, he took refuge in Buddhism at the recommendation of a Buddhist disciple, and devoted himself to the Buddha, which was ridiculed by many people. But he had his own point of view, and every morning and evening in the once quiet village he could hear the compassionate voice of his chanting of the Buddha, and he protected the peace of one side in his way.
The father's love for his grandchildren showed the kindness and great love of human nature, and whenever someone who asked about the Buddha offered candy, he was reluctant to enjoy it himself. I remember that after his eldest grandson moved, he wrote him a note in pinyin when he was in the first grade, expressing his idea of eating canned fruit in front of the Buddha and bringing it to others. After receiving the note, my father took out the cans and candies that had been stored for a long time, and rode a bicycle to send them to the eldest grandson. That kind of affection between grandchildren is the eternal memory and happiness he left for my children and grandchildren. A year before he fell ill and died, a friend who remembered his kindness and help sent him several boxes of ham sausages and nutritional products to replenish his body. He and his mother saved it intact, called me many times to pick it up, and gave his little granddaughter who was in junior high school for breakfast...
His father was gone, and after experiencing the pain and suffering of illness, he was reborn with some relief to the Western paradise he longed for. Left us with endless thoughts, the previous clarity I could not experience the pain of life and death. After my father left, I had a personal experience, and I often thought about it, and my father's love was like a mountain that had been sealed.
The heart is fragrant, and the past is with the wind. Open the floodgates of affection and remember your great father. Sandalwood incense repeatedly comes to the nose, the sound of the Buddha trumpet goes with the smoke, there is no regret in this life, there is fatherly love, and in the blink of an eye, he is also a father...