Recently, the news that ByteDance founder Zhang Yiming has become the second richest man in China has rushed to the hot search.
In the face of a good person, we are always curious about what his parents are like.
In addition to envying other people's children, parents can also do this - Shanbo education
Zhang Yiming's father initially worked at the Municipal Science Institute, his mother was a medical worker, and later his father opened an electronic product processing factory.
When I was a child, the most common topic my parents talked about was what products and technological inventions the friends of both sides made abroad.
Probably influenced by his parents, Zhang Yiming was very interested in technology when he was a child.
So his parents told him interesting stories about the inventions of scientists and took him to Xinhua Bookstore to buy books on science and technology.
Some people say that a child's education begins at birth.
Deeply.
From the moment the child opens his eyes to see the world, he begins a lifetime of learning.
Parents are the closest to their children, and every word and deed has an impact.
In the education of parents, there is a hidden future for their children.
01. Instead of envying other people's children, it is better to learn from other people's parents
In 2017, Wu Yishu, a 16-year-old girl who can recite 2,000 ancient poems, won the grand final stage in the second season of the "Chinese Poetry Conference" and won a big victory.
In 2019, she ranked 77th among Shanghai candidates with a score of 613 points (660 points in the Shanghai college entrance examination) and was successfully admitted to Tsinghua University.
People who have met her have commented on her like this: calm and composed, superior strength, temperament like Lan.
Undoubtedly, Wu Yishu is the envy of other people's children.
However, did you know that Wu Yishu in elementary school was not like what we see now? According to the teacher, at that time, she was not good at writing homework, perfunctory, stubborn personality, and the grades were at the bottom.
After my parents knew, I was also anxious and headache for a while.
Considering his daughter's future, Wu Yishu's father made a seemingly simple but difficult move, that is, he insisted on turning off his mobile phone at 4:30 p.m. every day and stopped playing his favorite chess. Instead, it starts from the child's interest, and accompanies the child to read and learn together every day.
Day after day, year after year, he found a learning method suitable for his children, and with hard work and careful companionship, he achieved today's Wu Yishu.
Behind every outstanding child, there is the hard work of parents.
Just imagine, if in the face of his daughter's bottom score, The martial father chose to let it go, or criticize and accuse, would there be today's national talented women who are concerned by the whole people and have outstanding temperament?
We always envy other people's children, but we have never thought that children are flowers watered by their parents, and behind the excellence of other people's children is the hard work of their parents.
The next time, when we see excellent children again, in addition to envy, what we should do is to learn from other parents.
Learn other people's ways and methods, learn people's intentions. After all, education also requires methodology.
Instead of envying other people's children, it is better to change yourself, change your own way of education, change your way of companionship, make yourself a better parent, and you will harvest better children.
02. Instead of focusing on your child's shortcomings, it is better to take the initiative to explore their strengths
In the second season of The Reader, there is a passage like this:
Everyone has their own talents, and if we had to measure the ability of a fish by whether it would climb a tree or not, it would be desperate.
Hui Ruoqi, former captain of the Chinese women's volleyball team, world champion and Olympic champion. The volleyball skills are superb and the people are beautiful.
But, you know what? It is such a tough, powerful, and dare to fight girl, who has also been confused and distressed.
Hui Ruoqi once told the story of her childhood in "Starry Sky Speech".
Hui Ruoqi's father is 1.97 meters tall and her mother is 1.70 meters tall. So, from birth, she was taller than a child her age.
But instead of bringing her joy, the tall man made her miserable for a long time.
When I was a child, because of my tall stature, I was often teased by my classmates.
Whenever she transferred to a new school, she had to explain to others very hard for half a day: I am not a repeat student, I am just taller.
Later, I accidentally entered the volleyball team. She seemed to have found the organization at once, and she found that the girls around her were all tall, and her height was no longer a matter of ridicule by others, but had become an advantage that could be proud of. She finally found confidence and a sense of belonging.
It can be seen that even excellent and gifted people like Hui Ruoqi will feel frustrated in an environment that is not suitable for themselves.
Every child is gifted and cannot be measured by the same standard.
There are whales, sea lions, octopuses, dolphins in the sea, if your child is a whale, let him be a whale, if he is a sea lion, let him be a sea lion, do not easily change the appearance of the child.
Maybe your child is not as good as others to dance, will she especially like to draw?
Maybe your child is more naughty, will his interpersonal skills be stronger?
Don't always compare the shortcomings of children with the advantages of others, but take the initiative to tap their advantages, find the shining points of children, and focus on cultivation.
Change your thinking and you will find better children.
03. Instead of worrying about the chicken baby, it is better to listen to the child's heart
The Internet buzzword "chicken baby" may be unfamiliar to unmarried people, but it may be familiar to parents.
It refers to the "chicken blood" for children who do not stop, so that children can get good grades and have good talents, and constantly arrange learning and activities.
Some time ago, a "6-year-old middle-class girl's schedule in Hangzhou" caused heated discussion among netizens, only to see that this schedule was full of 10 interest classes, skating, models, anchors, painting, dance and so on.
The girl's time was strictly arranged by her mother, and her mother did not stop for a moment.
While the girls were studying in the interest class, the mother was outside the classroom laying out the next day's study plan.
However, in the tree hole session, when the host asked the girl: Do you usually like your mother at home? The girl said: I don't like it, because if my mother is not at home, I can still play for a while.
When asked: Is your mother usually very fierce to you? The girl said: Yes. I sang, danced, hosted, modeled, I didn't like it, I liked to draw, but my mother thought I couldn't draw well.
When asked: What kind of person do you think Mom and Dad are? The girl said bluntly: Bad people.
When asked: Why do you always say "fake mom"? The girl said: Because my "real mother" is lost.
The first time I heard these words from my daughter, the mother in front of the screen couldn't help but cry, and her voice trembled and said: Maybe the sense of oppression I usually give her is too strong, it is true that I reported her a little more lessons, after watching this video, I was wondering if I should give her a little less...
Some netizens said: What you hear the most from childhood to adulthood is that you must be sensible, have to be prominent, and get ahead. But rarely hear, you have to be happy.
As a parent, you don't want your children to lose at the starting line, which is a common sentiment.
However, such a rough and anxious child's heart is stuffed, but the child is not happy, is that what we want?
If a child's childhood is only once, would it be better if we changed our approach and chose only a few interest classes that the child liked or was good at?
04
Changing one's own small practice may make the child happier.
Mr. Tao Xingzhi, a famous educator, once said:
True education is an activity that touches the depths of the soul only when it emanates from the heart.
When we love our children from the bottom of our hearts, we can certainly feel them in the depths of our children's hearts.
When we envy other people's children, first think about how other people's parents do.
When we see the shortcomings of our own children, we should not forget that each child has their own talent.
When we want our children to win at the starting line, we must also remember that happy childhood is only once.
Education begins with parents, parents change, children will naturally change.
Parents become better, and children naturally become better.
The best education parents can have for their children is to constantly become better selves.
Author ┃ Small connoisseur of newspaper sellers
Edit┃丄學号
Source ┃ Shanbo Education - Focus on parenting education