Touch this cold memory
The palms of my hands were covered with frost
Last night, I received Brother Wen Taoren's posthumous work "Golden Moonlight", which was sent by Mr. Muying.
There is a full moon in the sky and a cold smoke on the ground. It is the sixteenth day of the new year, the spring has passed, the rain is coming, and it is a new year, and everything is about to grow.
Old Wen's voice and smile are like in front of the eyes, once, in the Baihuazhou No. 1 Courtyard, Muying hosted the Xiaonanhu Night Market, the cultural flavor is very strong, Old Wen wrote in front of the courtyard, wrote bookmarks, and also sold and gave - as if it was yesterday, but the old Wen passed away for many years, and the Xiaonanhu Night Market also sold out.
Taking the book from the courier, I unconsciously open a page and flip through it (this is the habit of flipping through books, casually turning a page and reading a few sentences. Just turned to a page, the first sentence I read was: "Later, my mother said: "On the fifth day of the first year, your uncle burned for three years... On the fifth day of the first year, everyone was busy greeting the god of wealth, and the younger brother drove a van and dragged the family to participate in the third anniversary of the uncle's festival. ”
Brother Wen Taoren passed away on the fifth day of the Chinese New Year in 2021, and it turned out that Brother Wen's uncle died on the fifth day of the Chinese New Year in 2015, in the dark, as if everything had been arranged.
For Brother Wen's mother, fate was really cruel. This article "Years and Years, Middle-Aged Years" should be written in 2018. She lost her beloved brother on the fifth day of the Chinese New Year in 2015, and three years later in 2018, on the same day, she lost her beloved son.
The white-haired man sends the white-haired man, the white-haired person sends the black-haired person, and the old mother's sorrow cannot be expressed.
Reading "Golden Moonlight" last night, I learned that when Brother Wen was young, his family was also very poor, and his parents were honest farmers, who could not read a few big characters, and who had been stuck to the ground all his life to pull time, and was blessed by the geographical environment and climate, and had an apple orchard. I learned that my hometown is like his, on the magical latitude of 37 degrees north latitude, except that I am in the Great West and he is in the Great East. But we have a lot of similar habits, living in Da Kang, drinking a kind of pulp porridge, he put cattle when he was a child, and I put donkeys. We all grow wheat, corn, all rely on the sky (waiting for the rain and rain to water the ground) to eat, the only difference is that he planted apples early there, and we did not have market awareness until recent years, began to introduce large noodles, and now the apples planted in my hometown are introduced from Brother Wen's hometown of Yantai.
Yu Laowen, we also have a similar college entrance examination experience, the college entrance examination has not yet started, your parents built a tile house for you early, did a minimum living guarantee, and the test result is your own fate arrangement. For a person born in the countryside, it is very good to be able to take the college entrance examination, which is very good and good, and there are at least a fork in the road in front of you, which is for you to choose to work hard.
Here I also read Brother Wen's guilt about his brother, who dropped out of junior high school to farm and grow apples. Later, with the help of Brother Wen, apples were sold online, and most of our colleagues at the newspaper at that time bought them. He tried to help his brother push apples in the circle of friends, which was also a compensation for his debt to his relatives. In fact, many times, the smile on the face of our parents is the success we really strive for. For Brother Wen, the duration of his mother's smile was a little too short.
Hometown comes and goes, it is difficult for us to know the weight of time, it is even more difficult to feel the power of time, now many of us understand the so-called nostalgia, is nothing more than a nostalgia for the past life in the hometown, and who can really appreciate the worries of the rural people, like the fourth sister of Wen Taoren's brother, if he is still alive, he has been lying on the kang for sixteen years, how these sixteen years have survived, and how to survive... A man fell, he fell, and the miracle of standing up still did not happen.
Yu Lao Wen, gentle personality and generous chest, so that a lot of friends, Old Cui, Mu Ying, and a group of newspaper colleagues, in the pen of Old Wen, in his storytelling, these true stories, are under the arrangement of fate, everyone is playing a real script. In this script, there are laughter, struggles, inspiration, sadness, sighs, and helplessness, but more of an indifference.
Today, I opened this "Golden Moonlight" and touched this memory that seemed to have faded, once upon a time, there was also the pride of "no time to die, temporarily not to die, and choose a day to die", but now, touching this cold memory, the palm of the hand is full of frost.
Perhaps, people to middle age, as a journalist Wen brother, and we are born in this group of journalists, due to professional characteristics, has a more sensitive vision and unique life experience, can feel some common sense in a little ordinary small things, tossing between the hometown and the sickbed, the old Wen began to insist on writing twenty-four solar terms, this series is written, become friends' expectations and thoughts, just began to write, Wuhan has not yet a new crown, the hometown mountain flowers have not yet bloomed - today, the new crown is not over, The mountain flowers in the hometown have not yet bloomed.
Less than a month after writing the twenty-four solar terms of Gengzi, Brother Wen passed away. The last sentence in the article left by Brother Wen in this world is:
In the face of impermanent life, we need such a kind of insightful wisdom.
Of course, impermanence is not a bad thing, and all the possibilities of change are also contained in it. For example, after the great cold, it is spring again. ”
2022.2.18
