This original article originated from the public account "DT Finance" (ID: DTcaijing), author: Tim, Amy, Gao Gaoxin, editor: Tang Yeqin, data: Dong Daoli, A Wen, design: Zheng Shuya, Qi Tonghun, the title image from: Visual China
In mid-February, when the slot value of the straight male social platform is the highest in the year, various gift-giving accidents will erupt due to Valentine's Day, which will evolve into a large-scale mockery of the aesthetics of straight men. People may not care as much about their Internet presence, but they can't help but worry about whether the ability to give gifts will really affect intimate relationships.
A few days ago, DT Finance launched a small survey of men and women "gift-giving", and a total of 1114 friends contributed their answers, of which 90%, 95 and 90 accounted for 90%. So you could also argue that this is a gift-giving observation for young people aged 18-32.
In this small report, we will explore the views and anxieties of young people about gift giving between couples. Finally, according to the expectation difference between men and women, some specific and practical gift-giving suggestions will be excavated.
Here's what's in full for this report.
1/3 of the people have to give gifts to the other half every New Year's Day: the biggest gift-giving node is not Valentine's Day, it is a birthday
In intimate relationships, gift-giving seems to have become a common practice. Only 8.9% of respondents said that they would basically not give gifts to their other half or ambiguous objects. (Considering the screening nature of the research topic itself, the proportion of people with gift-giving habits in this survey should be higher than the actual level)
Men and women in intimate relationships are most active in giving gifts to their significant others at a stage where the relationship has been confirmed but has not yet received the Red Book's stable protection (restriction). In this survey, the proportion and frequency of gifts given by men and women in love are higher. They excelled in the highest frequency option, "Usually delivered", with a 1/4 selection ratio, which is almost twice the number of singles and married people.
Although various platforms and brands do not miss every festival opportunity, they use brainwashing, touching or shocking advertisements to tell you to be a sentient and righteous ceremonial person, and to spend hard for gifts. However, holiday gift-giving is not a conventional law of public love, and 1/3 of people said that they would give gifts to the other half every New Year's Day. Ranked first among various gift-giving habits, but not more than half, and 3 adults said they only gave it occasionally.
Another somewhat stereotypical result is that Valentine's Day is not the most exuberant gift exchange node in love. Even DT inevitably pushes this gift report on Valentine's Day, but back in real life, birthdays are the necessary moments for gifts in intimate relationships, and 80% of respondents will prepare gifts for their other half or ambiguous objects on their birthdays.
The proportion of respondents who will prepare gifts on Valentine's Day is just close to half, and the popularity of the gift-giving node is not as good as seeing the appropriate anniversary with us. So, if you don't have a gift-giving program this Valentine's Day, it's not a minority outlier.
More than 7 adults believe that gift-giving can express love: the younger, the more people understand the strength of both sides through gift-giving
Gifts for the other half are so common in intimate relationships, mainly because "gifts" are indeed quite responsible in everyone's love, assuming the compound function of expressing love, promoting feelings and understanding each other. More than 7 adults agreed that giving gifts to their significant others "helped me express my love better."
Younger friends will have more expectations for gift-giving, and the proportion of post-00s and post-95s who agree that regular gift-giving can enhance feelings is 10 percentage points higher than that of post-90s.
If the above two items are also full of romantic meaning of material affection, then understanding the strength of both sides through gifts is somewhat pragmatic, which is more obvious among young people.
Among the post-00s, nearly half of them believe that they can "understand the aesthetic and economic strength of both sides" through gift-giving, and improve the certainty for both sides to achieve a spiritual and material match.
The selection of gifts represents the logical aesthetic ability, and people with different economic strengths do not invest in gifts very differently.
The annual income of 110,000-200,000 is an important node, which is the stage where you are most reluctant to pay a lot of money for gifts. Among the various income segments, they chose to spend 0-20% of their monthly income on gifts, which is the most stingy of all options.
2/3 of people are anxious about gift-giving: boys want to have aesthetics, girls want to be innovative
Although there are no overt symptoms and most of them are seasonal, gift-giving anxiety has become a black hole that everyone cannot avoid in love.
Two-thirds of respondents will feel anxious about gift-giving, and the younger they are and the more unstable their relationship with their significant other, the more likely they are to worry about gift-giving.
"Don't know what the other person likes" and "don't know what to send" are the top 2 reasons why gifts cause anxiety. We boldly guess that if the shopping platform launches a gift-giving tutorial version for the above pain points, and enters "gift" in the search box, it will automatically jump out of the other half of guessing that he/she likes the interface, which should be extremely popular.
In addition to the above two common gift-giving anxieties, different groups of people have different biases on some secondary anxiety points. The more stable the relationship, the easier it is to feel anxious because the gift cannot deliver something new.
The proportion of boys who "doubt their own aesthetics on a daily basis" is much higher than that of girls, and girls are more likely to be troubled by "shyness in the pocket" and "it is difficult to send new ideas" in the gift-giving business.
There are differences in the points of concern between gift-giving and receiving gifts: 7 Adults pay the most attention to their hearts when receiving gifts
In response to the anxiety of the majority of the interviewees, we tried to provide a group version of guessing his/her preferences by showing the gift concept of both the recipient and the gift, and there is indeed a difference between the giver and the recipient, and between men and women.
When giving gifts, everyone pays the most attention to their own intentions, the practicality of gifts and the expectations of each other, and the proportion of each is close to 60%.
The ordering of gift elements by givers and recipients is basically similar, but if it is refined to the proportion of the group that chooses this item, there is a gap between actual and expected. These steep drops are the main cause of various gift-giving accidents.
"Meeting the recipient's expectations" and "the gift itself can be exposed" are the biggest misunderstandings of the giver about the recipient. The recipient does not care as much about the above two points as everyone thinks, but cares more than imaginatively about the "heart of the gift giver". Considering that how to express one's heart through objects is indeed a metaphysics, we can also understand why gift-giving has become a black hole in love.
Looking more specifically at the gap between men and women, female gift recipients pay more attention to heart and practicality than male gift givers, and do not value gifts so well, unique and in line with expectations.
This also reminds the majority of male friends that although every Valentine's Day social platform will appear in a concentrated way, if you start from this, to be able to dry and unique as the standard of gifts, I am afraid it is easy to walk into the misunderstanding of dust ornaments and strange and ugly things.
Boys don't have so many points to care about when they receive gifts, and it is good to be able to show their hearts. Therefore, what women care about in line with expectations, rituals, etc., is not so important to them. Probably because the expectations and requirements are different, whether in the self-evaluation or his evaluation, the boy's gift level is lower than that of the girl.
Thankfully, though, despite their modest gift-giving ability, the majority of men are honestly aware of this.
How to effectively give gifts to girls?
A qualified guide to guessing that he/she likes gifts should naturally be refined to specific gift types, and first look at the error between the ideal and reality of gift giving between couples.
Because of these errors, gift-giving often turns into a psychological drama of "I'm really nice with this gift, why aren't you happy" and an acting competition with the performance of "Do I look real with this fake smile?"
In the field where girls are the recipients, among the top 10 popular gift types that girls like, boys can step on 8 categories (the results are OK).
Judging from the group record, boys can give key gifts with more precision: jewelry. However, the bag, a gift at the top of the girl's wish list, did not enter the popular list of boys' realistic gifts.
We further calculated the difference in the proportion of girls who want gifts to receive and boys who actually give gifts, and can give some category suggestions for boys' gift-giving careers. The gifts that fall the biggest gap with women's expectations all look more expensive. (Advance forecast, in the boys version is also a similar result)
Real estate and cars do have greater challenges to the economy and feelings, it is recommended to choose to send some bags and 3C digital to girls, and the level of gift giving will go up to a higher level.
Girls do not like food and drinks as much as boys think, if you insist on sending chocolate or snack gifts to the "wonderful" combination of Galafi grass for a long time, it may test the woman's feelings and acting skills for you. Of course, the flowers are also very good, or 1/3 of the girls will like it. But more than half of the boys rely on flowers, so it is inevitable to fall into brainless and unintentional accusations.
In addition to the categories, we also collected everyone's memories of specific gifts, looking for some cases of "good delivery, you are really a roundworm in my stomach" and "next time you are not allowed to send it again".
The most attributable gifts given to good gifts are jewelry and 3C digits, refined to specific items, and the top 10 are necklaces, perfumes, mobile phones, books, lipsticks, watches, skin care products, red envelopes, electric toothbrushes and headphones. Popular minefield items are lipstick, clothes, flowers, perfumes, necklaces, cups, ornaments, chocolates, money and scarves.
You should also find that some items overlap and have one commonality - there are certain requirements for the aesthetics of the giver. If your everyday aesthetic hasn't received the true praise of your significant other, we recommend that you avoid these gift zones that are either super-gods or super-ghosts.
How to effectively give gifts to boys?
In the ideal and realistic gift-giving world of women facing male friends, the biggest misunderstanding lies in clothes, and there are not so many boys who need clothes from their other half of the shopping cart.
Further calculating the difference in the proportion of gifts that boys want to receive and girls actually gives, men and women agree in the field of "I want but you never send", which is a large amount of valuables.
Although the boys themselves are keen to deliver food and drinks, they actually do not want to receive a box of potato chips themselves.
We also noticed that the anchors focused on recommending skin care products that could be sent, and the consumer society and girls were eager to upgrade the majority of boys. Only boys don't care as much about their faces as the outside world thinks.
In general, if you want to give gifts to the man in the intimate relationship 3C digital is an area that everyone can continue to focus on, toy fashion play, their own DIY, shoes and clothes can also be used as a reserve pool in the long-term gift-giving journey.
In the specific "good delivery, you are really a roundworm in my stomach" and "next time do not send again" case area, the gift that is sent well belongs to the 3C number at most. Down to specific items, the top 10 are shoes, watches, money, headphones, models, books, peripherals, computers, keyboards, and DIY. The most popular minefield items are shoes, headphones, clothes, fuwa, books, lighters, perfumes, sweatshirts, scarves and belts. This sends an important message to try to give as few gifts as possible to the male partner's "wearing" related gifts.
That's all for this report.
In this report, we have found from everyone's definition of gifts that young people tend to become more and more pragmatic in intimate relationships. Gifts do have both instrumental and emotional elements, and Yan Yunxiang mentioned in "The Flow of Gifts" that "the two factors of developing emotional connection and cultivating personal relationships give meaning to the practice of gift exchange".
Although we also ended up presenting a gift-giving guide with some utilitarianism, which made a practical split between the gift and the heart, we still can't help but have some expectations, expecting that love is a more romantic relationship, expecting that your gifts will no longer be wrapped in anxiety and utilitarianism, and finally just arrive in each other's hands with love.
Happy February!
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