After the 80s, they are still hovering in the ranks of "older leftover women", and 90 and 00 have begun to divorce or even second marriage. Therefore, in real life, such voices are more endless.
"People in their thirties, what else to pick", "Don't look at how old you are, the requirements are still so high!" Wait, and under such a voice, many people have chosen to compromise.
It may not be best to be carefully selected, but it is necessarily worse to be hungry and choose food
When I saw that the people around me were getting married one after another, I started to feel a little overwhelmed, because they all handed in their papers, and I hadn't started answering the questions yet, and I admitted that I panicked.
This is not long ago, accidentally brushed on a platform content. Maybe it was after a Spring Festival, older men and women were forced by the elders to go on a blind date and urge marriage, or maybe the age rose by another number and was forced to be anxious.
This feeling is the same as a younger brother or sister who is one round younger than you, who has bought a house and a car, while as an elder, you are still empty-handed, running around in the big city without actual gains.
I can't tell if I am a little more envious, or if I am a little more jealous, and what is hidden in it is my own inferiority that has nowhere to rest.
And when a person with a weak heart and often affected by the environment encounters such a situation, it is easy to choose a partner, hungry and sloppy. As everyone knows, what you think of solving the problem is actually creating a bigger problem.
A wrong choice, the subsequent chain reaction, will be double or even multiplied.
It may not be best to be carefully selected, but it is necessarily worse to be hungry and choose food. Not to mention whether the other party's character and three views are guaranteed in the short term, and whether it is suitable for you in the end.
Can't wait to get rid of the current anxiety, choose to be hungry and choose not to eat, you have verified your own heart and ability to solve the problem without reasonable.
People often lament that they have heard a lot of truths, but they still can't live this life well, because the truth is summed up by others after hundreds of battles, but for you, it is just a piece of paper.
In life, there will always be people who will tell you as a person who has come over, how the blueprint for marriage should be, saying that marriage and children should be early, otherwise others will pick the rest!
The pen that draws the blueprint is in your hands, and the world's famous painting celebrities are often not with the public, because they are unique enough, so they can stand out.
Age has always been a hurdle in marriage, and what you should step through is the way in your heart, not the way attached to the public eye.
The meaning of marriage is at least to be happier than it is now
Regarding the matter of marriage, if we go back to the era of material scarcity and male superiority and inferiority of women a long time ago, its significance will be divided into two factions: the rich marry in order to pass on the generations, and the fat water does not flow to outsiders; the marriage of the poor is the union of the weak, resisting risks, and producing their own "labor force".
The original marriage will not be crowned with the four words "because of love", because when there is no material, the first thing people will choose will be their own material needs, and survival is higher than love.
And now, why don't women want to get married now? This question, in addition to women can self-protect their own lives and solve their material needs, there is an answer that is very popular with the public.
I don't want to get married simply because I'm lazy, I don't want to cook three meals a day, I don't want to squat in the bathroom every day, wash a lot of clothes, brush the toilet used by the whole family, I don't want to sweep the floor, I don't want to work hard to manage a relationship, I don't want to manage family finances, I don't want to catch xiao san, and I am not willing to deal with the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and accept cold violence.
A person is more comfortable, do something when you want to eat, order takeout if you don't want to cook, play for a day if you want to play, and sleep for a day if you don't want to move.
The reason why this answer is approved and recognized by most women is because they live the opposite life, and everything will look beautiful because of the contrast.
Some people are single and are choices; some people are single and helpless. What you should be struggling with is not whether you want to choose marriage or singleness, but whether you have the ability to live your own life.
Getting married is not the only and necessary option for all, it's just that most people are on this path. It's like crossing the street, whether you "run a red light" with a large army or follow your own traffic rules alone is up to you.
We always say that our parents don't understand what they want, but sometimes when we think about it, we can't seem to say what we want word for word.
Only when people understand what they want will they filter out what they don't want. Whether it's work or feelings, this is the most effective way.
If you can't afford to choose what you choose, then choose what is good for you.
Instead of ending hastily, start with caution
"Your aunt Wang's son next door is good, programmer, high salary, people are honest", "Mom, I said I don't want to get married now", "You are almost 30, if you don't want me to urge you, then bring yourself back", similar topics, dialogues, in recent years, I don't know how many times it has been repeated, for this reason, Xiaomei gradually stopped contacting her parents and told her heart.
But no matter how 30-year-old Kan escapes, it will eventually come. Xiaomei resolutely did not want to marry when she was young, and she also began to waver after seeing her friends who had sworn to marry because of love, but also because of her age, she took the wedding ring one by one.
Just like her parents said, she really didn't have the ability to bring back someone she liked. She has been waiting for the past few years, waiting for a person who loves herself and loves herself to appear, but after all, she does not have this fate.
At the New Year this year, Xiaomei saw her cousin, who was two or three years younger than herself, with her newborn son and her husband who had recently married, came to her house to visit the New Year, and when relatives saw it, they turned to "care" for themselves, and when their hearts that were already shaky finally fell.
Soon after, Xiaomei began to accept blind dates, those people are nothing bad, but there is nothing good, very honest, very obedient, very pragmatic, and very boring.
As if wearing a template, answering one question after another, both sides are interviewers, looking at the "resume", silently measuring each other's "worthy" in their hearts.
After experiencing countless blind dates, Xiaomei finally met a suitable, that person is nothing special, just very good to Xiaomei, and she has not talked about love many times, so she began to communicate with him, and under the urging of both parents, she entered the palace of marriage in less than half a year.
But after the marriage is the birth, Xiaomei originally wanted to work mainly, but what she did not expect was that the man who was very good to her was better for her parents, and everything was based on the mother's requirements as the "holy will", and she did not care about her feelings at all.
Not only did she resign to prepare for pregnancy at home, but she also took her mother-in-law to their newly married cottage privately. A year later, Xiaomei finally couldn't bear it and filed for divorce before she had children.
We often say: the male should be married, and the female should be married. And most people also abide by such rules, they are afraid that once they deviate from the trajectory, their lives will be deviated.
Marriages that just started in a hurry are tantamount to pulling up seedlings to help them grow, and once they usher in the wind and rain, they will easily turn against each other.
This story is not that you must enter into marriage with the person you love, but that you should carefully weigh when choosing your partner, and after meeting, getting along, and getting to know each other, then let the other party participate in the second half of your life.
The reason why women now live happily is because they have realized that treating themselves badly is the initial source of unhappiness.
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