The plot is not very bloody, about the love between teachers and students on American college campuses

The love between teachers and students on college campuses has always been the theme of domestic literary and artistic works, and the United States has also been like this: he is a young literature professor with a red face and a beard, she is a college freshman with a pair of watery eyes; he is talented and talkative in class, she sits in the front row with admiration and concentration... The spark in the classroom morphed into the heat of the bedroom and finally into a brief and disappointing affair, a classic image of American soap flakes in the sixties.

Banning teachers and students from falling in love has become a consensus of American universities

Time flies to more than fifty years later, the relationship between teachers and students on American university campuses is no longer allowed by the moral code of teachers, that is, it is against the school rules to fall in love with students, almost all American university teachers and staff manuals have such a provision: teachers are strictly prohibited from "provoking" students, or more explicitly, it is not allowed to have any romantic or gender relations with students.

This provision can be traced back to 1984, when Harvard University was the first to issue a rule prohibiting romantic relationships between professors (including professors' assistants) and students who directly teach and directly, which was the first teacher-student love rule promulgated by American colleges and universities. For a long time thereafter, teacher-student love without direct teaching and mentoring relationships on campus was allowed, until 2001, when a teacher at Virginia College of William and Mary published his love story with a married student in a men's magazine, which caused a great impact on public opinion, and concerns about allegations of sexual harassment by teachers led to the school's decision to ban teacher-student love, which was the first time in an American university that teachers and students without a direct mentoring relationship could not fall in love. It was quickly adopted by many universities in the United States, especially private universities.

In fact, the fundamental reason for the prohibition of university teacher-student love lies in the inequality of power between teachers and students, if teacher-student love is allowed, teachers with power (scoring, recommendation, etc.) may abuse their power and sexually coerce students who do not have power, while students who are weak sometimes have to submit, and the gender relationship of "mutual consent" is difficult to exist between people with unequal power, so the essence of prohibiting teacher-student love is to prevent the abuse of power.

Obama and his wife risk "capsizing" because of teacher-student love

Another reason for prohibiting teacher-student love is also to prevent students from falsely reporting allegations of sexual harassment by teachers after the teacher-student relationship breaks down. Originally a consensual teacher-student relationship, once an emotional entanglement occurs, the student on the inferior side may sue the teacher for revenge. According to the statistics of the California Teachers Association, from 1992 to 1998, there were 34 cases of students in California who falsely reported teacher sexual harassment due to the breakdown of their relationship with teachers, due to the law that employers also bear relevant responsibilities after employee sexual harassment, for the benefit of the school, teachers, and students, many universities had to put risky teachers and students in love with a one-size-fits-all and prohibited things. In view of the same reason, the employee manuals of many companies in the United States have also issued similar regulations, that is, employees cannot fall in love, especially between employees with superior and subordinate relations, and once a private affair occurs between employees, one of them must resign.

Interestingly, the current president Barack Obama has also been caught up in the muddy waters of "teacher-student love", and during the 2008 US election, the media accused Mr. and Mrs. Obama of being a teacher-student love, when the Obamas met at a law firm, when Obama was only a summer intern, and Michelle was already a practicing lawyer at the firm and his internship instructor. Fortunately, the two met in the 1980s, and the prohibition of teacher-student love in the United States was a later event. In the current American campus, as long as the teacher-student relationship is made public, the school punishes not the student but the teacher, because the teacher has more power than the student in the system. Any teacher who has this kind of teacher-student relationship will be fired or expelled once discovered, and the exception is very special.

Prohibiting teachers and students from falling in love is not the same as hindering the freedom of love

Writing this, you may ask, does the prohibition of teacher-student love hinder the freedom of love? Just as the inability of executives of two companies to communicate the secrets of the other company is not an obstacle to freedom of speech, the prohibition of teacher-student love in American universities is just a restriction on the love between two specific professions under a specific circumstance, and if the teacher and student really love to the death, one of them can resign or withdraw from school. If you choose to continue teaching or studying, you have to say goodbye to the affair.

In the United States, this is not only required between university teachers and students, but also for many professionals, such as between doctors and patients, between lawyers and clients, between pastors and church members, etc. It is not possible to fall in love or have a gender relationship, if found, lawyers or doctors will be revoked, this provision is mainly to avoid the coercion that may be brought about by the inequality of power between each other. If the doctor and the patient or the lawyer and the client are in love with each other, if they want to fall in love, they must first dissolve the doctor-patient or lawyer-client relationship, and sometimes have to use the written form.

Writing this, I am reminded of the story that happened to myself. It was still celibate, and one year because of the cross-border and cross-state income that made the tax filing extremely complicated, I had to ask a lawyer to take care of it, so I found the father of the girl (of course, there was no girl at that time), and at the end of the first consultation in his office, he suddenly said: "I can't take your case, I still recommend the same experience xx to represent you." In my utter astonishment, I only heard him continue, "Are you free tonight?" Let's have a meal together, shall we? "I was stunned for a moment, and then I suddenly understood... So, whenever I asked how I had a crush on my father, I explained it like this: In order to have the opportunity to marry your mother and give birth to a lovely you, your father didn't even earn the money sent to the door...

Author: Solo Dance of the Heart Road

The author works for a university in the United States and writes columns on American issues for many domestic media