"Born light, but also pure."
This is the title that Liu Xuezhou gave to the suicide note.
At 07:00 on Jan. 24, he released his last video.
There is only one photo, taken towards the sun.
Two hours later, Liu Xuezhou swallowed dozens of antidepressants by the sea in Sanya.
At 4:00 a.m., after the rescue was ineffective, Liu Xuezhou died.
He is only 15 years old.
A month ago, he was still such a smiling teenager.
In his suicide note, Liu Xuezhou said he was a "student, a person who strives to shine."
But in his short life of 15 years, the light is not transparent.
The only label he put on himself was "strong" —
A strong boy, he was sold by his parents as a bride price at birth, and his adoptive parents died at the age of four.
Victims of bullying in schools, molested by male teachers, looking for relatives of boys.
Abandoned for the second time, turned black and white upside down by the birth parents, "net violence", fake laughing boy.
Each one is a weight that life cannot bear.
But in his video account, there was not a trace of pain.
Before December 14, 2021, he released a video of the breath of youth.
Record the beauty of life, climbing mountains, shopping, taking photos with classmates, singing songs on the military training playground.
On December 14, he responded to the progress of the online search for relatives, the future is uncertain, but the words can be seen full of confidence.
Later, he found his own vaccine book and learned that his original name was Ding Jing.
He said hello to himself: Hello, Ding Jing.
As the search for relatives continues to progress, his videos have a lot of laughter.
While looking for your biological parents, you can take classes and study.
Probably for Liu Xuezhou at that time, finding his biological parents was the biggest pursuit of life.
He needed a consolation too much.
Since the age of 4, Liu Xuezhou has had a real feeling of pain.
On June 16, 2009, a fireworks explosion accident occurred in Mengcun, Taipei, Xingxing, Hebei Province, killing one and injuring two people.
Once he died, he was Liu Xuezhou's adoptive father, and he was injured twice, including Liu Xuezhou's adoptive mother.
The night before the accident, he was clamoring to go to his grandmother's (adoptive) house for one night, and his adoptive parents had no choice but to agree and escape the disaster.
When I saw my adoptive mother again, I was already a blur of flesh and blood.
In this nearly ruined house, Liu Xuezhou saw his adoptive mother for the last time.
Since then, he has become a government-funded orphan, and his annual tuition fees have to be paid by receiving money.
But school life is not friendly.
In the sixth year of elementary school, he transferred schools five times.
Every time you move to a place, there is a new round of school bullying.
Even the obscenity of male teachers.
It was also at this time, in the gossip of his classmates, that he learned that he was not born to his adoptive parents.
In December last year, Liu Xuezhou saw Sun Haiyang, who had successfully searched for his son on the Internet, and he finally couldn't hold back himself and started his family search journey with a short video.
The road to find relatives is not real, one clue after another emerges, and the dawn is in front of us.
He had one birthday at school, one of only two birthdays in his life.
Bitter people, just a hint of sweetness can be filled.
On December 15, the biological parents were found.
He was really happy:
"This bleak 17-year story is coming to an end."
(Liu Xuezhou was born in 2006, 15 years old, 17 years old)
No one expected that this would be the beginning of a greater tragedy.
At the time, it was a happy ending for everyone.
Although his biological parents have divorced, at least he has a father and mother.
His happiness lasted a total of 7 days.
What happened next, everyone knows.
Trying to find relatives, but finding a "joke".
From his biological father's mouth, he knew that he was not abducted, let alone given away at the beginning.
Instead, it was sold by the birth parents for 3,000.
Rao was so, and he didn't despair.
His birth mother invited him back a few days later for his half-brother's birthday, to invite eight tables of people, many friends, and the emcee, which was a birthday he never dared to ask for.
He went and bought gifts for his brother.
He said he had finally become a happy "little friend.".
At his birth mother's house, he heard her mother's sister complaining about her search for relatives.
He silently returned to Shijiazhuang, with no land to live in, and stayed with his aunt's (adoptive) family.
So he wanted a place to live and consult with his birth parents.
His biological father scolded him as a white-eyed wolf and destroyed his own family.
The birth mother directly blocked him, and blamed the original buyer for poor conditions: "Who let them hold it?" ”
Despite liu Xuezhou's notes to her, it is still "mom".
For the rest of his life, he just wanted a home.
Liu Xuezhou's appeal has been reduced from having a home to:
"I just want a residence, buy or rent a one-bedroom and one-room apartment, no longer need to live in the place."
But in the mouths of the birth parents, it is a different scene.
His biological father claimed that he let Liu Xuezhou live with him, and Liu Xuezhou only wanted to buy a house.
But Liu Xuezhou had never even entered the door of his biological father's house.
The birth mother said that she lent money to Liu Xuezhou for tourism, and the other party would take revenge.
Liu Xuezhou kept explaining that the travel money was earned by his summer vacation work.
But whatever he said was useless.
Those who know me are worried, and those who do not know are what I want.
The most important thing on the Internet is the person who does not know.
A group of people, using the so-called rationality and so-lucidity, take a magnifying glass to pick a minor victim's fault between the lines.
Another group of people, with their brains full of prejudice and ignorance, wantonly insulted a boy full of grief with false accusations.
Liu Xuezhou was about to be crushed.
From "Good aunt, I will not fail everyone." ”
To "Hope one day I can meet my redemption." ”
Only four days.
Those accusers, I don't know where the moral saints came from, I don't know if they can compare with One of Liu Xuezhou's toes?
Liu Xuezhou filmed the awards he received from childhood to adulthood, and he couldn't put down both shots.
During the epidemic, he was also the "most beautiful volunteer".
Why don't you say live well and study hard? He has tried.
You say why not find a job and find a way? He's tried.
Life didn't get a little better because of his efforts.
Then you say he 'sells miserably' and "cyber beggars".
(Liu Xuezhou's biological father circle of friends)
Why is he still in the mood to go to Sanya?
He's looking for death!
On January 20, Liu Xuezhou praised the Weibo of lu Dawson, a photographer who committed suicide.
On January 21, Liu Xuezhou sent out seven groups of photos with the seven letters of "r", "e" b", "i", "r", "t", "h", which together are rebirth, which means rebirth, resurrection, and rebirth.
On the same day, he said that he was "born of the sun, and fears the heart of a villain." ”
But the villain won after all.
He didn't get through it after all.
Even in the final moments, he kept the initial sunshine.
Half of his bank card balance was left to his grandmother and half to the orphanage.
And to those who cared about him, I said sorry.
"The sun shines on the sea, and I return to the sea."
Liu Xuezhou was born to the sun, and this is true.
When I heard the sad report, I couldn't help but think about how good it would be if Liu Xuezhou didn't find his biological parents.
Whether it is his weibo or short videos, the occasional life photo is sunny.
When he is constantly getting better, he meets his biological parents and pulls him into the trough of life again.
Perhaps, regarding the concept of home, Liu Xuezhou has a completely different definition from his biological parents, one is a family field, and the other is a trading field.
With this ruthless heart, in brother's view, is the source of this tragedy, and what he should do is not to rush, but to prosecute.
But then again, how can you expect a teenager to have a hard enough heart to face the cold of the world?
Liu Xuezhou died.
When he was born, he was used by his biological father as a bride price voucher to marry his biological mother, and he threw it out without guilt.
When he found his biological parents, he was constantly turned away as a burden.
Flesh and blood relatives here become a one-way chase, and children shout at their parents in the back, but they are thrown farther and farther away.
I'm almost certain that in the end no one will be punished for Liu Xuezhou's death.
Although they are indeed murderers.
I can also be sure that if it weren't for his suicide, he would still not be able to wash himself away.
But he died, and everything was irretrievable.
Why?
It shouldn't be like that.
Liu Xuezhou is only 15 years old!