According to a survey by a network, 45% of women will choose to endure after encountering domestic violence, when we see those cases that have caused family tragedies because of their silence, they will mourn their misfortune, anger them, from the perspective of bystanders, we can't feel the pain, but what should cause us to think is why they don't argue?
When people face danger, they have an instinctive sense of resistance, but those who are violated by domestic violence seem to be numb, like the old man who is dying, there is no vision and hope for life, not that they do not want to resist, but the reality in front of them is too bloody.
Economic independence, spiritual independence, children, gossip, are the mountains in front of them, it is not easy to cross these, but Hubei's Wan'er mother has set an example for those victims of domestic violence in despair, in a program of Mother's Day planning activities, this brave and confident mother, tells us: Encountering domestic violence is not terrible, you can still live a wonderful life.
Wan'er's mother and husband are free love, and after marrying in Hubei, she is full of expectations for a married life and entrusts her future to her husband. After becoming pregnant, she resigned to become a full-time wife, and then her in-laws moved in to live together, and she was happy at first, and she could take care of each other.
During the pregnancy, although her mother-in-law did not treat her as warm as the spring breeze, she did not pick bones in the eggs. Until after giving birth to a daughter, the mother-in-law heard that it was a female doll, and her attitude changed 360 degrees, as cruel and ruthless as the wind rolling down the leaves. She couldn't understand, it was the 21st century, how could there be such an ancient "son preference" idea?
The mother-in-law does not like the little granddaughter, usually does not take care of the children, but also always mocking and sarcastic, she is aggrieved in her heart, complaining to her husband Li, did not expect that Li is a mother treasure man, for the mother's life is subordinate, do not comfort her, but also scolded her, saying that she is useless.
Such a family on the stall, getting rid of the sea of suffering as soon as possible, is the best choice, she is not unaware of this truth. But the child is only two months old, she has no financial resources, the child's living expenses have to rely on the Li family, can only endure, but the tolerable days are difficult.
She and her husband are renting a house, at first the husband will give her some family, and then the mother-in-law provoked the relationship at both ends of the three days, and asked for All of Li's salary, she could only rely on the money saved from the previous work to support herself and her daughter, and then her mother fell ill and was hospitalized, and she urgently needed money, she borrowed money from her husband, but she was only beaten, and since then she has been completely cold to this family.
For her mother's illness, she spent all her savings and borrowed money. The mother-in-law probably knew that she had no money, and expected that she would not dare to divorce her, and she would become more and more harsh on her, and she would add to her the suffering she had suffered.
Since that beating, her husband has opened the valve of violence, and as long as she and her mother-in-law have an argument, they will beat her indiscriminately, once hitting her with a dislocated jaw, injuring her tail vertebrae, and not allowing her to go to the doctor, just because of the absurd reason that "the ugliness of the family cannot be publicized".
She could not live such a low-pitched, sniffing life, she could not live any longer, and she was afraid that one day she would become numb. In order to get rid of such a distorted environment, she began to silently plan the "escape plan".
Knowing that divorce was the only way to start a new life, she began collecting evidence of her husband's domestic violence. But divorce is not enough, the husband's family does not attach importance to the daughter, after their divorce, what should the daughter do, if they do not have a certain income, the custody of the child, can not grasp.
So she began to hide from her in-laws, picked up the knowledge and skills she had given up one by one, and used all her spare time to do part-time work, although it was hard, but finally saved 30,000 yuan in more than a year, which was not much money, but enough to ensure a period of life after divorce.
With this money, she also had the confidence in her heart and filed for divorce with her husband. At first, the in-laws did not agree, let her think clearly, and said: "Once you leave, don't think about turning back, no one wants you at that time." But she had already made up her mind and directly filed divorce proceedings.
According to Article 1079 of the Civil Code (former Marriage Law), where one of the spouses requests a divorce, the relevant organization may mediate or directly file a divorce lawsuit with the people's court. The people's court hearing a divorce case shall conduct mediation; if the feelings have truly broken down and the mediation is ineffective, the divorce shall be granted.
Divorce shall be granted in any of the following circumstances where mediation is ineffective: bigamy or cohabitation with others; domestic violence or abuse or abandonment of family members; repeated corrections in bad habits such as gambling and drug abuse; separation for two years due to discord in feelings; and other circumstances that lead to the breakdown of the couple's feelings.
Wan'er's mother's husband committed domestic violence, the evidence was conclusive, and the court granted a divorce. As for custody, according to the relevant laws, after divorce, children under the age of two are directly raised by the mother.
Where a child who has reached the age of two fails to reach an agreement on the issue of maintenance between the two parents, the people's court shall make a judgment on the basis of the specific circumstances of both parties and in accordance with the principle of the most favorable advantage for the minor child. Where a child has reached the age of eight, his true wishes shall be respected.
Xiao Wan'er was not yet two years old at the time, and her mother had a certain income, and finally was sentenced to Wan'er's mother, the original Marriage Law stipulated that after divorce, if the children were directly raised by one party, the other party should bear part or all of the maintenance. Li needs to pay a certain amount of life to Xiao Guan'er every month.
Divorced, Wan'er's mother finally let go of the boulder in her heart and felt that she was breathing the air of freedom. Although life after the divorce is not easy, looking at her daughter's innocent smile, she has infinite courage.
She did not think about remarrying, while taking care of her daughter, while setting up a stall, life is still difficult, the daughter often bumps and bumps, but perhaps the little age has vaguely understood the mother's strength, rarely crying. This made Wan'er's mother also quite remorseful, in order to give her daughter a safer environment to live, after several years of struggle, she finally saved enough money to open her own small shop, everything is moving towards the good.
Like Wan'er's mother, there are many people who have suffered domestic violence, and I hope that everyone can be like her, pluck up the courage to face the waves in life, "the mountains and rivers are full of doubts and there is no way." Willow dark flowers bright and another village. "If you don't try, how do you know that the future is not gorgeous?"
(Involving privacy, the names in this case are pseudonyms, and some of the pictures are from the Internet, which only matches the narrative.) Warm reminder: respect the original, please do not plagiarize the handling and reprint Oh)