Due to the impact of the epidemic, our way of life has been forced to change a lot. However, the disease does not stop because of these changes. Some people who are suffering from tumors or other serious illnesses and are about to die, because of the epidemic, cannot wait until the closest people accompany them to the last journey of life, which is an irreparable regret for patients and their families.
However, distance does not isolate love, and even if they are thousands of miles apart, the concern, grief and love of loved ones can still be expressed. As in the following poem.
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The following poem has just been published in jama oncology, the authoritative journal oncology, and the author is a nurse who cares for an elderly person who is dying, but her relatives cannot return to her. The nurse used the mobile phone video to connect with the elderly's relatives and bid her farewell. There is a saying that as long as it is remembered, the person has never left.
"Please say hello to Grandpa on our behalf"
"Her health is deteriorating and we're worried she's running out of time."
I said the words calmly
But on the other end of the phone, can her grandchildren hear the trembling of my voice?
It was early in the morning
I walked into her room, and there was no one in the room
Her breathing was not as usual
I was no longer excited to hear my voice
Her eyes were closed but not as if she were asleep on a normal day
On the other side of the world
Her grandchildren called a farewell party for eight grandchildren
I stood outside her room door
Introduced myself to the strangers on the eight-digit line
"Are you ready?"
Look at her face
They were all silent
Then came from the phone:
"Wake up, Grandma, open your eyes.
We know you can.
We are here to accompany you.
Can you hear? We love you! ”
It's sad
Although it is not said to me
I let myself quiet down and hide
Hopefully they forget about my presence
Even for a moment
But, perhaps
I can do more than just hold my phone
This time I said softly
"You can tell her what you most want to say."
Man's sense of hearing and touch is the last to disappear
Although she may not respond again
But your words will give her the greatest comfort."
They pondered for a moment
"Grandma, you must be sad right now
If you feel like the time is up, if you feel tired
It doesn't matter, we understand
Dear Grandma, God is walking with you
We love you
May you never suffer
Please say hello to Grandpa on our behalf."
In the articles on cancer degree, we have always insisted on selecting topics from evidence-based medical literature sources, and most of the articles use numbers and various charts to convey professional science knowledge, which is a little less warm.
When I saw this poem, I wanted to share it with everyone, maybe Chinese translation doesn't reflect its feelings very well, but I got another feeling from it: say goodbye no matter what.
Many times, after a patient is diagnosed with cancer, the first person to get the news is often the family. In addition to being shocked and sad, the first consideration of the family is: Do you want to tell him the truth? There will always be a subconscious choice to conceal, worried that the patient's psychology can not bear, thus aggravating the disease, some patients do not know the truth until death. In fact, many times, both parties feel that they are thinking about each other, but although they have been hidden for a while, they have lost the opportunity to say goodbye to their relatives.
Some people are separated from death and come unexpectedly. Therefore, when we know that we are powerless, accompany our loved ones to the last journey of life and say goodbye seriously. Because the goodbye is the end and the beginning, the pain and the hope.
References: Wendy Tong, BA,JAMA Oncology, December 30, 2021.