The old father abandoned his wife and daughter when he was young, and now he is seriously ill and wants to return home
【Narrator: Ms. Wang; Record: Anne Chunhua】
More than 30 years ago, my father abandoned his wife and daughter and took care of himself. When he was powerless and seriously ill, the women outside left him. At this time, as a child, should we stand by and watch?
One
I grew up in a small county in the northeast, and since I can remember, I have often seen my father abusing my mother.
The mother had no job, was only obedient to her father, and never thought of divorce.
My father was the head of the local tax department, and the dinner party was almost every day, and every time he came home in the middle of the night, he would find trouble and beat his mother.
One of the most memorable things is that late one winter night, my father returned home drunk and called for the door outside, and he actually thought that his mother had opened the door late, and beat her to the point of bleeding.
At that time, the family lived in a bungalow, and the winter in the northeast was cold.
My father didn't come back until midnight, and of course my mother had to put on her coat before she could go out and open the door.
At that time, the yard was very large, and walking from the back room to the courtyard entrance, of course, took time. But my father couldn't even understand this bit of common sense.
The mother was abused by the family for three days and at both ends, and because of the perennial sullenness, when she was less than thirty years old, she underwent a major operation and the uterus was removed.
Since then, my father has rarely returned home. Occasionally, when I came back, I actually took a strange woman to spend the night at home, and my mother had to cook for the woman.
When I was a child, I didn't understand these things between men and women, but I didn't understand them until I was older.
Father took advantage of the advantage of work, and many women who did business took the initiative to approach him, but there was only one fixed woman, that is, the woman he brought home.
Many years later, I still complain about my mother, and I can't say how much I feel sorry for my mother.
The father actually brought the women outside home, and let the mother go to serve and drink, and openly spent the night in front of his wife.
Ever since my mother had that major surgery, my father would laugh at her when he saw her: "Boy!"
Every time, my mother was speechless, not arguing or arguing.
Even so, once the father comes home, even if it is three times in the middle of the night, he must look for a domestic violence mother.
When I was in junior high school, I was awakened by a bang on the door late one night, and I hurriedly got out of bed and opened the door.
At that moment, I was really stunned!
My mother lay on the ground in pain, covered in blood, her thin body curled up, her breath weakly calling out my name.
I asked my mother more than once, why didn't I divorce my father?
The mother always smiled bitterly and said that the children were so old, what marriage did they divorce? Besides, she had no financial resources.
On the surface of the family, life is getting better and better, eating and drinking, moving from the bungalow to the building, and the father's position is promoted to the main post.
But the suffering of our mother, and the absurdity of our father, are known only to our own families.
There was a home outside the father's house, and there were other women outside, and the mother did not dare to ask at all.
The family's financial expenses, my father never treated us badly, and gave my mother money on a monthly basis.
However, in her early 40s, her mother suffered from a variety of diseases, and her thin and small body was still subjected to domestic violence for many years.
Two
In the second year of my work, I found a partner to marry, and my mother was very pleased.
But my father was not satisfied with the boy I was looking for, and he thought that the man's family was too poor.
My mother told me that as long as two people look at each other well, they will be comfortable.
Unexpectedly, in the third year of my marriage, I was laid off with both partners, and the family could not make ends meet.
My mother asked my father to find us a job, but my father didn't even care, he said we deserved to be unlucky.
My father thought that my partner would not come to trouble, and sometimes when I came home and met to eat together, he also scolded and grinned at this son-in-law.
As an object, I have an arrogant personality, unwilling to sneak up on my father, and I almost quarreled with my father several times.
The family had a former bungalow that had been rented out outside. Since I was laid off, my mother persuaded my father to give us the bungalow.
But my father, stunned, disagreed, saying that my poor days were found by myself and had nothing to do with him.
The house I lived in after marriage was rented, and my in-laws had no money and no conditions to buy us a house.
Later, my father actually sold the bungalow, but he refused to let us live.
In those years, my partner and I rented a counter in the store, and we sold everything, but life was still tight.
I also tried to do some other business, and repaid a lot of loans, but I lost money every time, and I was so poor that I couldn't turn over.
Every three or five minutes, my mother would buy something to come and see us, and every time she would give me some money to make up for my life.
Although my father was rich, he never helped us, but always sneered at us like strangers.
After a few years, my parents moved to a high-rise house, and the ordinary building where they originally lived was sold by their father.
My mother was in the back, so angry that she shed tears, and advised me not to be angry.
In fact, I hate my father in my heart, because he beat his mother, but we can't do anything about him.
The mother did not have the courage to divorce, saying that she was sick and could not live on her own.
Fortunately, my father rarely came home later, and my mother could live a few days of pure life.
Three
I told my mother more than once, why did my father treat her like that?
The mother is hard-working and hardworking, can pick up all kinds of housework, has a character that bears humiliation and burdens, and looks very good-looking.
My mother told me with a bitter smile that a man beating his wife is a disease that cannot be changed.
When she was young, her mother once said that if she could earn three hundred yuan a month, she would divorce her father.
Just because the mother could not stand on her own financially, she had to endure humiliation and sorrow and maintain a marriage in name only.
There is also a key issue that strong fathers do not divorce. Although he has a home outside his home, he still has to maintain the illusion of family happiness.
Many years passed, and my father finally retired.
Probably because he had been an alcoholic for many years, his stomach was cut off by a third before he retired.
In the second year of his retirement, he was diagnosed with cancer, but he still drank heavily every day.
Suddenly, one day, he went home skinny and never wanted to leave.
It took several days for my mother to ask why.
My father's terminal illness has reached an advanced stage, and he can live for a year and a half at most.
The woman who lived with her father was supposed to accompany her father all the time, but her children insisted on taking her away.
In this way, the father returned to his mother's side at the last time of his life.
For half a year before my father left, he was always in the hospital and was very thin.
At that time, my mother was also sick, suffering from illness every day.
Although I hated my father when I was a child, at that moment, looking at my father in the hospital bed, the hatred in my heart suddenly disappeared.
I stayed at the bed day and night, taking care of my father unclothfully, tired to death.
But I still insisted, did not find a nurse, and did everything myself.
My father was sick to the end, unable to say anything, his eyes blank and dazed, unable to guess what he was thinking.
Although my father did not say a word of sorry to me and my mother, he must have felt guilty in his heart, right?
On the day my father died, I was inexplicably sad in my heart, crying until I had no strength, and my mother kept shedding tears.
Can't tell why? In the face of such an incompetent father, I couldn't bear to let him go in my heart, or I hoped that he could live well.
Even if he has a home outside his home, he just doesn't want him to abuse his mother again.
After her father left, her mother's life was clean, and no one bullied her anymore.
I once asked my mother, why did she marry my father in the first place?
Although my mother was sick and weak, her eyes were still bright and energetic, and she smiled and shook my hand.
"When your father was young, he was a red man in the commune, and the composition of the family was good..."
Before my mother could finish speaking, my heart sank, can these reasons be the reasons for marrying in that era?
My father did have a successful career, but who would have thought that he was an alcoholic and a domestic abuser?
Now my mother's life is finally comfortable, but her time is not much after all, and she has to live in the courtyard for a few days every three to five days.
I heard that my mother's marriage was arranged by my grandmother, and even forced to die.
But my mother never complained about my grandmother.
Parents and parents, the original family in many cases, will make us feel helpless, there is no choice.
Just like my origin, no matter how ruthless my father and daughter are, at the critical moment, they still have to send their father to the end of their lives.
If I don't do this, I won't forgive myself, maybe this is the magic of kinship?