"Stars on Earth" is directed and starred by The Indian national treasure actor Aamir Khan, who is an Indian actor I particularly like, and he starred in "Three Big Fools and Big Fights in Bollywood" I brushed back and forth five or six times, laughing and laughing, crying and crying, crying and laughing, which is the criticism and ridicule of school education, which makes people think deeply.
This time, amir Khan, in the film "Stars on Earth", continues to attack India's contemporary education system, but unlike "Three Fools", it focuses more on reflection on homeschooling.
Stars on Earth
< h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" > a brief story</h1>
"Stars on Earth", with a length of 2 hours and 42 minutes, tells the story of a scum child who counterattacks and becomes a bully.
The little protagonist, 9-year-old little boy Ethan, is a problem child in the eyes of parents, teachers, classmates, neighbors, he has poor homework, zero points in the door, he has poor self-care ability in life, he can't even tie shoelaces, button buttons, he also behaves poorly, lies, skips school, "makes trouble" in class, and breaks the heads of other children.
His parents were afraid that others would come to complain and complain, and when the principal firmly stated that Ethan would be expelled at the end of the semester, Ethan's father ignored Ethan's bitter pleas and sent him to the boarding school for "strict discipline."
In boarding school, Ethan was still a hated child, the teacher did not like him, punished him, beaten, scolded was commonplace, and his classmates laughed at him for alienating him. In the unfamiliar environment, he was particularly helpless, he wanted to go home, but his father refused to take him back, and in his constant torment, his spirit gradually moved to the brink of collapse.
Until one day, the school came to a substitute art teacher Nick, Nick found that Ethan has a more serious dyslexia, in order to help this child, he spent two or three hours a week alone to teach Ethan, Nick firmly believes that Ethan is a wonderful child, Nick's positive expectations let Ethan have a chemical reaction, let him complete the counterattack from scum to bully.
"Stars on Earth" is not an inspirational story, it is actually a work that explores the importance of homeschooling.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" > "Stars on Earth" reveals 4 major pain points in our homeschooling</h1>
Pain point one: Children are always working against us
Fact: Parents can't see their children's real existence
The greatest pain for a child is that he is never really seen.
Ethan, in the eyes of his father, is a problem child, with poor grades, poor behavior, and nothing.
Ethan was inattentive in class, had serious problems with reading and writing, and the father did not think about why the child was like this, but assumed that there was something wrong with the child's learning attitude.
On the other hand, Ethan's extremely talented paintings and those paintings full of imagination and expression are regarded by his father as useless and meaningless "skills".
Ethan's parents, invisible, inaudible, could not feel Ethan's true existence.
This is a disaster for children.
Pain point two: We are very good to the child, but the child is getting more and more naughty
Fact: "Rich" children materially and "poor" spiritually
Ethan's family is a more typical family of male and female protagonists, the father is outside to earn money to support the family, to provide material conditions for the family, while the mother at home to take care of the family, take care of the housework.
In terms of material conditions, his parents performed their respective duties, and both did a good job and performed their duties in their posts.
But all this is only good at the material level, and their psychological care and care for children is particularly lacking.
There are three manifestations.
1, the father decided to send him to boarding school, Ethan pleaded bitterly, the father still insisted, when the father saw his son staring at him angrily, he even frightened his son and said, "The people over there will beat you until you obey."
As a father, he cares more about his authority, more about "I feel" than about the child's feelings, and he doesn't think about how much the child will be hurt by being sent away.
2, When Ethan was sent to boarding school, the parents drove away, the father was cold and desperate, and for this son who gave them a headache, they threw it to the school like a baggage. They will even take the initiative to demand that the school be stricter with children, and they should be beaten and scolded.
3, When Ethan's parents came to see Ethan at school for the second time, Ethan became taciturn, behaved abnormally, was in a very poor mental state, and had nightmares all the time, and despite seeing the pain of the child, his parents chose to let their son stay in school.
How cruel!
Pain point three: We force our children to succeed and do their best for them, but they don't appreciate it!
Fact: Parents love their children conditionally
Many parents have this logic.
If you obey, I will love you, and if you do not obey, I will take back my love for you.
Ethan's father, when the child was persuaded by the principal to resign, in order to avoid the child being expelled, in order to save his own face, he transferred the child to boarding school in advance. In his opinion, a problem child like Ethan did not deserve to love him so much.
In fact, not only for Ethan, the father's love is conditional, for Ethan's brother Yuhan such a bully child, the father's love is also conditional.
When Yuhan lost the tennis match, the father did not go forward to encourage and comfort, but angrily grabbed the hat and threw it to the ground, while throwing disappointed and angry eyes at his son, completely unable to see the shadow of love.
For my father, I love you because you are excellent, give me a long face, and now you make me lose face, then I don't love you.
Many parents in reality are actually like this.
Children are excellent and obedient, they are particularly good to children, eager to hold children in the palm of their hands, but if children do not become what they want, they will feel ashamed, as if children do not deserve parents like themselves.
Recently there was such an incident: a 10-year-old boy went to the police station for help, hoping that the police uncle could send him to his grandmother's house, because he was scolded by his mother at home for doing a wrong question, he felt sad, he wanted to go to his grandmother's house for a few days, when the police contacted the boy's mother, the mother said: "If you don't study well, you don't want to be my child." ”
The logic of this mother is: you obey, go to school well, your mother loves you, if you don't go to school and don't obey, then I don't love you, I don't recognize you as a son.
Conditional love is not love at all.
Pain point four: Our beloved children, but they resent us and alienate us
Fact: Parents think they love their children, but they don't know what love is
When Mr. Nick discovered that Ethan was suffering from dyslexia, he took a long drive to Ethan's home for a home visit.
His visit made Ethan's father angry because he felt that Nick was accusing them of not caring enough about Ethan.
So, on a business trip, Ethan's father was passing by school, and he specifically found Nick and told him that after that home visit, he and Ethan's mother had consulted a lot of information about dyslexia, and he said, "I don't want you to think that we don't care about Ethan at all."
In Ethan's own eyes, they were a particularly competent and caring pair of parents.
Nick's next words are very thought-provoking, and he said to the father who thought he had been "wronged": "Care, this is very important, it can make the treatment more effective, it can also alleviate the pain, let the child feel needed, occasionally a hug or kiss, tell him I care about you, son, I love you, if you are afraid to come to me, you fall or fail, don't worry, I accompany you, constantly emphasize, this is caring, right?" "
What is caring? Many parents' so-called concern for their children is nothing more than a kind of self-righteousness and self-motivation, and they do not really understand what true concern is.
< h1 class= "pgc-h-arrow-right" > only a pair of eyes that are missing between the bully and the scum</h1>
Who doesn't want to have a bully child, parents are worry-free, can also satisfy their own vanity, nothing in the circle of friends, or in front of friends to show their godson.
But the truth is that many children who are not academic bullies have seriously underestimated their abilities and talents, and many of their unique advantages have been ignored by parents who only value grades.
The counterattack of the scum to the bully
Ethan was before, difficult to read and write, lonely and unsociable, mischievous, zero points in the door, repeating the grade twice in the third grade, being dissuaded by the school, and even going to the boarding school, the principal also planned to expel him because of the complaints of the teachers of various subjects.
What did Ethan become? He showed his unique talent for painting, and the teachers who had once hated him were now evaluating him as follows: "The child is very energetic, very original, very good", and the principal who wanted to expel him said to his parents: "He is very talented, I am so glad that he came to our school." "
It's hard to imagine that such a different evaluation refers to the same child.
What does the scum rely on?
It is not an easy task for scum to counterattack as a bully. Especially for a child with dyslexia, it is even more difficult. But such a change did happen.
The reason for the change was that he met a teacher who was particularly good at discovery.
Nick had also been a dyslexia child, his father did not understand him, the people around him laughed at him, and the desperate situation of not being understood and rejected made him particularly miserable, so when he saw Ethan, it was like seeing another self, he was determined to help him out of the predicament.
Ostensibly, Nick did four things:
1. He took a car to Ethan's house and made a home visit. He gained insight into Ethan's problems and was surprised to discover that Ethan was a child with great artistic talent, and based on this, he found an improvement plan that suited Ethan.
2. He told the children stories of some celebrities with dyslexia who eventually shined and became famous, so as to inspire Ethan to regain his strength and confidence.
3. He asked the principal to give Ethan a chance to temporarily give ethan to take the exam in the form of an oral answer, and the principal was touched by his persistence and agreed to his request.
4. He uses three hours a week to give Ethan one-on-one special training, and he uses many unique ways: let Ethan write on the sand, play addition and subtraction games on the steps, use plasticine as a hand, and help Ethan overcome the reading and writing obstacles while improving the child's artistic awareness.
In fact, Nick did only one thing: see and actively expect it
Children naturally identify with those who truly love them, who may be their parents, or their friends, their teachers. And when these people who love him have positive expectations of him, miracles will happen.
This is known as the Rosenthal effect.
The Rosenthal effect shows that when there is a very strong expectation of something, the desired thing will appear, and passing on positive expectations to a person will make him progress faster and develop better.
Correspondingly, if negative expectations are conveyed to a person, that person will give up on himself, abandon himself, or even "kill" himself.
Nick once told Ethan's father a story about Solomon Island: on this island, if the inhabitants wanted to cut down a large tree, they would not use an axe, but surrounded the tree in the middle, and kept cursing, and within a few days, the tree would die.
Negative expectations, its lethality is very large.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" > the mother of the worm said:</h1>
As Nick said in the play: "This is a cruel, competitive world, everyone wants to cultivate excellent talents, everyone wants high scores, everyone wants to pull seedlings, wants to stretch every finger, always pull, whether his finger will be broken!" "
This is the reality of society, in order to let the child win at the starting line, in order to let the child take the high score, we have forgotten the original intention.
Fortunately, Ethan meets Nick, a teacher who can find the sparkle in him and genuinely cares about him, and he is seen and given a new life because of Nick's positive expectations, and grows up again, from a ridiculed scum to an impressive bully.
The counterattack from scum to school bully is actually very simple, does not require much advanced educational skills, and does not need to spend a lot of money to ask a famous teacher, as long as parents have a pair of eyes that find their children's shining points, with positive expectations for their children, they can be realized.
Every child can become a school bully!
The first step we have to do is, like Nick in the play, crouch down, sincerely look into the child's eyes, and say to him: "Child, I love you, if you are afraid to come to me and you fall or fail, don't worry, I am with you." "
The second step is to tell the child, "You're a great kid!" "
You will find amazing changes in your child.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" > digression:</h1>
The film is a real reprocessing of life, and the play ends up with a beautiful ending, but in fact, a teacher like Nick is unattainable, he needs to be particularly loving, he needs to have a strong empathy, empathy for Ethan's pain, he also needs to have a very high educational wisdom, in addition, he also needs the support of the principal to give them the green light.
See, Ethan's new life actually needs too many conditions.
So, I'm a little pessimistic, because, in the real world, Nick doesn't exist.
If the story is presented in a realistic way, then its final outcome should be: Ethan is constantly hit at this school, all his self-confidence is completely destroyed, and his parents abandon him, and his only choice is to kill himself, either to close himself in his own body and become autistic and depressed person, or to jump from a tall building and end his life.
It was horrible.
But this is a tragedy that some Chinese families have been playing out.
Parents are overly motivated by scores, constantly persecuting their children, crushing their spirits, making them feel that they are really worthless, and in the end, the children will end their lives like the big tree on Solomon Island.
We can't expect our children to meet a savior like Nick, to teach them not to fake their hands, we need a pair of eyes of discovery, and positive expectations for children, which can help them slowly get out of trouble and get better and better.
The future of the children can be expected.