As the saying goes, men are afraid of entering the wrong line, and women are afraid of marrying the wrong man. It is estimated that women will be concerned about such a question, what kind of man should be married? Of course, everyone looks at it separately, and each has its own good. Some women value the man's height and appearance, some women value the man's economic strength, some look at the man's family background, some look at the man's age and education, and so on. You may ask, why doesn't Lao Du say that the woman values the moral character of the man? I'm sorry, moral character can not be used as a premise, because it can not be quantified, you see, women's height and appearance, economic strength, family background and even age and education, can be listed clearly, so that you can see at a glance. Suppose on the other hand, a man with high morals and excellent character but short and ugly, dick silk, home in the countryside, old age and low education, who can look up?
Does the woman still have a reference standard for choosing a mate? Lao Du believes that there is absolutely, and there should be options that can be quantified and cannot be quantified, plus one, that is, the mentality of men. The principle is to marry someone with a growth mindset, not a person with a fixed mindset.
So what is a growth mindset person? They believe that things can be changed, and that whether it is appropriate or not depends more on the effort and effort of the individual. After a growth mindset person chases you in the hand, he will not think that this is the end of his efforts, but the beginning of his efforts. In married life, it is impossible to avoid bumps and bumps, and once there is a problem, he will try to find a way to solve it one by one, rather than looking for a new relationship.
People with a fixed mindset are just the opposite, they think that things are static, suitable is appropriate, inappropriate is inappropriate. In the choice of mate to find the most suitable person, in their cognition, the most important effort is in the stage of search and pursuit, chase you to hand, happiness will be achieved, in case of problems, indicating that the wrong person was chased. So, when you say leave, you leave. You see, why was the marriage of the parents' orders and the words of the matchmaker in the past much lower than the divorce rate of today's free marriage? Because of the forced marriage, both men and women have no other choice, and if there is a problem after marriage, it can only rely on the two of them to resolve and adapt, which stimulates their growth mentality. You see, when a girl is looking for a fixed mentality, after marriage, both parties will easily look more and more unpleasant, and looking for a growth mentality, the more run-in the better.
Do you think there is some truth, please press a thumbs up, because bald old Du is a person with a growth mindset.
The picture and text were originally created and drawn by Lao Du
East and west crooked up and down, south cavity north tone sour sweet bitter spicy