Text: Huo Hui
Starting headline number: Hoho's little world
During a training session, the teacher asked us to make a game.
Each person extends the index finger of their right hand in a clockwise circle in a horizontal direction directly below themselves, keeping their eyes on the trajectory of the fingertip movement.
The teacher asked what graphics were we seeing? Round, of course.
The teacher asked again: Is it a clockwise or counterclockwise circle? Everyone answered in unison, clockwise.
Then the teacher asked us to raise our fingers above our heads to continue drawing circles, and everyone was surprised to find that the circle we saw now was counterclockwise!
The teacher tells us that everyone perceives the same thing differently, looks at the same thing, and comes to different conclusions, perhaps even diametrically opposed.
I suddenly thought, why is there always someone stubborn? It's not because he's bad, it's not because he's stupid, it's that he doesn't have enough cognitive levels.
We can always meet such a person around us, they only recognize their own reasoning and experience, instinctively resist different voices, completely do not accept the opinions of others, obviously they are wrong, you say that he is not listening, simply can not communicate, stubborn ideas seem to be deeply rooted in their minds.
There are many such people online.
There was an old man who did not listen to the hard advice of the police, and the persuasion did not work for three days, and he was defrauded of 5.67 million. A husband refused to sign his wife's painless delivery document, despite the doctor's advice. Because he thinks it will affect the child. The wife, who couldn't stand the pain, angrily shouted "I hate you for the rest of my life!" ”
A lady had a sudden idea, mixed more than 20 kinds of fruits at home to juice, performed intravenous infusion herself, and was finally sent to the ICU... After being rescued, she regretted: "I thought that fresh fruits are rich in nutrients, and injecting them into the body only has benefits and no harm." ”
In life, we often hear such remarks:
Long hair, short sight. What a tattoo for a serious girl. Where there is any depression, you just can't think about it. Fat people are definitely gluttonous...
But in fact, the driver of the Lamborghini is not necessarily a local tycoon, but also a driver; the tattoo on the girl's body is to commemorate the death of her father, she has not even been to the bar; the fat man only eats a little every day, and he gets fat because he has diabetes and insulin...
The saddest thing is that these opinionated people do not know their ignorance, they will only stick to their ideas, and they will be frogs at the bottom of the well.
The more ignorant people are, the more blindly confident they are, which is the "Duck Effect" in psychology.
There was once a robber named Wheeler who, without any mask, robbed two banks in Pittsburgh with a gun. Naturally, the police quickly caught him.
He looked puzzled when he was caught: "How did you find me?" I obviously smeared invisible liquid on my face! ”
The policeman was amused by him: "What invisible liquid? ”
Wheeler looked serious: "Lemon juice! ”
It turned out that he knew that lemon juice could be invisible after writing on paper, so he stubbornly believed that smearing lemon juice on his face could be invisible, and the camera could not shoot it.
This stupid thief caught the attention of David Dunning, a psychology professor at Cornell University, whose team experimented and found that people who lacked the most knowledge and skills were the most unable to recognize their own defects, which is known as the "Duck Effect".
There is a Dak effect everywhere in our lives. For example, the more students learn, the more they feel that they have done well in the exam, and the more novice drivers drive, the more daring they are.
The reason why they stubbornly believe in their own judgment is because they are ignorant, and the ignorant are fearless.
Teacher Luo Xiang said it well:
"The poorer a person is, the more he possesses an inexplicable sense of courage and pride. Because the poorer the knowledge, the more absolute what you believe, because you have never heard the opposite point of view. Night lang arrogance is the nature of the ignorant and the argumentative. ”
Don't argue with ignorant people because they will pull you to the same level and then beat you down with stubbornness and make you collapse.
The best way to deal with this kind of person is to stay away from him, often compete with his peers for the world, and not argue with fools about short and long.
Why are people opinionated? Psychologists also give professional explanations.
American psychologist George W. Bush. Kelly proposed a theory of "personal constructs".
Personal concepts are concepts formed by individual past insights, expectations, evaluations, thinking, and so on.
When you encounter the same or similar scene, your previous experience will be presented in your mind to make a judgment about the scene.
When your cognitive ability is very low, the personal concept in your mind is very simple and incorrect, and you yourself mistakenly think that this is the whole, the best point of view, there is no other choice, so you will be lost in self-confidence.
But if you gain more knowledge and experience from learning or practicing, your personal concept will be richer. At this time, when faced with similar situations, there are more coping strategies to choose from.
The world in the eyes of the stubborn person is a judgment question: there is only one answer; and the world in the eyes of the flexible person is a multiple-choice question, he knows that the same thing can have different options, and the answer may not be the only one.
For example, people with low levels of cognition think that a job is only paid. Because the people around him are like this, he firmly believes in his own experience. When it was said that there were multiple rewards for one labor, he was adamantly unconvinced.
But people with a high level of cognition can accept the view of "one thing and more for more". For example, writing a book, the same pay, sell more than one book will have more income. When he accepts this view, he will also think, is it possible to "work less and get more" or even "get more without working"? Then he will think, to study, to find answers and to practice.
Socrates said, "The only thing I know is that I don't know anything." "The more people with higher cognitive level, the more they know that they are ignorant, the more they can accept different views, and the faster they grow; conversely, the more people with low cognition are, the more they are stuck."
Stubbornness blinds your eyes, makes you gradually lose yourself, slowly disconnect from society, and alienate yourself from friends. Therefore, if you want to progress, you must break the shackles of stubbornness.
So how to improve cognition and break stubbornness?
If you want to break your stubbornness, you must go out of your own small circle and see the heavens and the earth, see all beings, see yourself, and see the larger world.
1. See the heavens and the earth
Adult cognition is obtained through learning and practice. Reading thousands of books, traveling thousands of miles, the body and the soul must always have one on the road, so that we can increase our insight.
See the world with your eyes, measure the earth with your feet, walk the road you haven't walked, see the scenery you haven't seen, see the unknown world, and experience more life.
Look at the world, and then have a world view, you will find that the world you once saw was so small, once you were a frog at the bottom of the well and arrogant, the original thinking is not limited, can be so wonderful.
Horizons are broadened, prejudices are reduced, inner patterns become larger, you begin to become humble, tolerant, optimistic, begin to understand and accept different people and perspectives, and are more willing to accept and try new things.
2. See all beings
Generally speaking, most of the friends in your circle of friends are at the same level as your cognition, and your way of thinking, behavior and values are similar.
Interacting with people who think the same way can actually limit your horizons. If you want to broaden your horizons, you must make more friends with different people and make friends with people with high cognitive levels.
The Medici was a banking family in Florence, Italy, who sponsored many sculptors, scientists, poets, philosophers, financial experts, painters, architects, etc., who gathered in Florence to learn from each other at regular gatherings, and to break each other's business fields and cultures, and later created a new generation with new ideas, the European Renaissance.
When you step into the intersection of different fields, different disciplines, and different cultures, you will create a large number of new and groundbreaking ideas by combining existing ideas, a phenomenon known as the "Medici effect".
Therefore, it is better to read thousands of books than to travel thousands of miles, to travel thousands of miles, it is better to read countless people, to read countless people, and it is better to be guided by high people. Meeting a mentor and friend when you're young will benefit you for the rest of your life.
3. See yourself
There is a saying in the Analects of Learning, "My Three Provinces and My Body", which means that we have to introspect ourselves many times a day. Introspection is review.
Repetition is a review; disk, is introspection. Review, reflect on what you have done, where you have done well, where there are still deficiencies, deficiencies, think about how to improve, and implement these improvement countermeasures in the next step.
Only by introspecting yourself every day will you make progress day by day. The sun arch is endless, and the merit is not donated to the sea. Even if you only make a little progress every day, you can eventually reach the other side of victory over time.
In this life, people are paying for cognition, self-knowledge and ignorance, will always seek knowledge, lifelong growth.
Only by insisting on learning, maintaining independent thinking, increasing knowledge reserves, and accumulating practical experience can you improve your cognitive level, and in the long run, your stubbornness will be less and less.
About the author: Huo Hui, main business: senior engineer of Fortune 500 companies, Nissan global certified improvement expert. Sideline writing, multi-platform contracted author, former reader new media writing coach, the whole network read hundreds of millions of dollars. The first headline of this article: The Small World of Hoho.