Are you talking too bluntly and unkindly? Or maybe you're talking too tactfully to reach your goal? Did you ever feel frustrated for not being good at communicating?
I believe that most people will have more or less communication barriers, will doubt their communication skills, will envy other people's talk, and even because they are not good at talking, they will be inferior and excluded. So, have you ever wondered what causes this? Is it because you are born flawed? Or is it someone else's innate ability? This is not the case. Communication is an art, and we need to learn how to communicate with people in order to become a well-spoken, clear "communication master".
American writers Ronald ▪B▪. Adler and Russell ▪F▪ Proctor have all gathered various communication skills in this book "The Art of Communication: Seeing into People and Seeing Outside", which is the valuable experience they have gained through countless verifications and hands-on practice, and the author believes that this book can be positioned as the best reading for college students to contact interpersonal relationship courses, and it is a valuable textbook that attaches equal importance to theory and practice.
1 Introductory basics of interpersonal communication
We should ask ourselves, why do people need to communicate? I think many people, like me, think that solitude is the most popular spice in the boring everyday life. It is true that each of us needs to be alone, and the need for solitude far exceeds our actual time alone. But, on the other hand, everyone also has their own tipping point of solitude, beyond which pleasure becomes suffering. In other words, we all need relationships, we all need to communicate.
Communication is a physiological need. Many people have seen the movie "The Rest of the Desert Island" and are amused by that "volleyball partner" Wilson. And it is this volleyball that gives the protagonist the courage and strength to live, so it can be seen that communication, like eating and sleeping, is the basic physiological need of people.
Communication is about identifying with needs. I would also imagine that if I didn't communicate with others, would I be able to know who I was? Everyone is born in this world only in a small amount, not even a sense of self-identity, and it is in the process of others interpreting us that we gradually understand who we are.
Communication is a social need. Studies have shown that there is a strong relationship between effective interpersonal communication and happiness. Good communication can enhance friendship, but also can obtain sweet love, can effectively enhance people's happiness.
Communicate to achieve goals. In addition to meeting social needs and shaping our self-identity, communication is also the best way to achieve what communication scholars call instrumental goals.
Communication is very important in many aspects, and communication skills are a skill that everyone can master, communication masters not only have a variety of behavior reactions, but also know how to show the most appropriate and perfect behavior in the right place, come on, let's learn together how to become a "communication master"!
2 How to communicate
A new medium of communication. In the new era, communication is no longer a simple face-to-face communication, but more through the Internet, mobile phones and other communication equipment to communicate, to learn different communication skills for different social media, improve communication skills on social media, in the exchange at the same time also to learn to protect themselves.
Try to describe yourself. Let's try to describe ourselves, what are our characteristics? Make a list to know yourself, let yourself know more about yourself, the most important issue in interpersonal communication is self-disclosure, so that others can be more accepting of themselves.
What you see is what you get. Emphasize the role of the self in communication and analyze the important role of perception and emotion in communication.
3 Medium of communication
Language: Barriers and bridges
Language is symbolic, and this essence is a gift from Heaven, which is the ability for us to communicate ideas, causes, pasts, futures, and things that are not present in a way that would otherwise be impossible. Language is a great communication tool, but it is also a source of many problems between people. Different regions, different genders, different races, different ways of expression, only a good understanding of each other's habits, in order to better build a bridge of communication.
Nonverbal communication: Information that goes beyond words
Nonverbal communication contains many means that are not related to language, such as body movements, sounds, touches, appearance, time, etc., which is extremely important for communication masters, because nonverbal communication is everywhere, we must be particularly cautious when interpreting nonverbal clues, and it is very embarrassing to understand it wrong.
Listen: Don't just hear
Listening is the most common and perhaps the most overlooked form of communication. There is a difference between hearing and listening, and being absent-minded is completely different from listening without distraction. The process of understanding the message conveyed by others while listening consists of five elements: hearing, focusing, understanding, responding, and remembering.
If you also want to become a "communication master" through affirmation training, social skills, business communication, etc., it is recommended that you read this book. If you want to build good interpersonal relationships between friends, colleagues, classmates, relatives, and husbands and wives, it is also highly recommended that you read this book "The Art of Communication" that many "communication masters" have read.