The Old Story of My Teaching Career (XIX): The Hunger Diary of a Student

19. Students' Hunger Diaries

I often think that I certainly can't love my students as much as I love my own children—even though I don't have children of my own. Later, I slowly realized that if I had such thoughts, I would never be able to bring them with me, because only when I regarded them as my own children or brothers would I strictly demand them, and there was only one kind of love, called "strict love". When I can't tell what is "education of love" and "love of education", it is difficult to grasp the leniency and strictness. I can only slowly ponder, ponder, and then slowly improve on the road of education.

In my class as a class teacher, there has been a lot of progress compared to the beginning, the discipline of students has not been so relaxed, the results of various subjects have improved, especially the English subjects I teach, the enthusiasm of students to memorize words, phrases, and memorization of texts is very high, and the content of the first year of junior high school is reviewed in six weeks, and many students take it seriously. I guarantee that my class will improve, and I will not relax the first grade, let alone relax the third grade. The three grades are basically in parallel.

During the internship, the instructor Mr. He often exchanged experience with me, that when the class teacher must grasp the students' trends at any time, there is a way, that is, to let the students write a diary, write out what they see, think, and plan every day, and from the diary, they can not only see his inner world, but also cultivate their writing ability.

I asked every student in my class to write a diary, at least three times a week, and more than that, two diaries each, one for each weekend, and another for the second week.

As soon as I finish my teaching tasks, I read the students' diaries to understand their real thoughts, and if there are students with fluctuating thoughts, I call them to communicate and solve their confusion.

Today, Saturday, the first time the students handed in their diaries, at noon after school, the study committee held the diaries on the desk in my office, fifty-seven diaries, not a few.

After lunch, I went to the office and flipped through a few diaries.

A student named Zhou Chuan wrote: I really don't know what the diary writes? I have never written any diary, only know that the new class teacher has managed us very strictly, so that our grades in various subjects have improved a lot, those naughty guys in the past do not dare to be naughty anymore, in fact, the class teacher does not beat people, we dare not be naughty, the previous class teacher used violence against us, either beating or scolding, our class naughty people are more, I really don't know why?

I looked at Li Qigang's diary again, and he wrote: I always feel that the new class teacher has brought us hope, treating us like brothers, often caring for us, seeing that my clothes are rotten, sending me new clothes, I have no pen to write, he sent me a new pen, to my home to visit my home to give me living expenses, such a teacher I met for the first time.

As soon as I had time, I pulled a family routine with me, asked Han to ask ambiguous, he was extremely observant, once I lay there without spirit, the teacher came over and asked me if I was sick, I said I had a headache, he took me to Dr. Wang to see me, even the medicine money was paid for by Teacher Han, I am so grateful to him.

After reading these two diaries, although the language is not concise and accurate enough, it is simple to write and feel the heart, which is very good.

I simply sat down and looked at it, and then turned down, Wang Chenglan's diary.

The diary reads: Since Family Planning made a mess of my family, especially after they brought my rice into the water. Although I was fortunate to be able to go to school with the help of Teacher Han, I was often hungry in the past few months, I never had lunch hunger in school, I drank porridge for breakfast, and when I went to class, I felt weak, what the teacher said, I didn't know, even if I learned something, I forgot.

Hunger often makes me dizzy from bout to bout. Sometimes I can't walk steadily, I have to drink water to fill my hunger, drink too much water, go to the toilet, have to hold on to the wall when I go to the toilet, between classes, the students all go to the outside of the classroom to play, only I lie on the table to rest, the noise of the classmates in the classroom is all a piece of buzz in my head. I even felt that my head had become a heavy burden, and it was very uncomfortable for my body to support such a large weight.

　　Every day I look forward to getting out of school early, where I can pick sweet potatoes in the field and eat them raw, so that I can replenish the heat energy my body needs. I wanted to check a little sweet potato in the morning to go to school, in order to fill the hunger at noon, I was afraid of being late and criticized by the teacher, and by the afternoon, I didn't eat, and I no longer had the strength to go to class.

Hunger made me unable to go home, and it usually only took an hour to travel, but I might now have three or four hours, and I had already picked up the harvested sweet potato fields on the slope. Back at home, I only have to wait for dinner to have a little strength, and dinner is often a little porridge with sweet potatoes.

I eat very little during the day, and as soon as I fall asleep at night, I dream that I am chewing and eating, eating my stomach is bulging, and the feeling of eating is enjoyed in the dream, and whenever I wake up with nothing, I cover the quilt and cry.

I have developed a dependent desire to eat, hunger has been interfering with my learning, I can't even listen to the lessons, I don't have the heart to listen to the teacher's salivating lectures, and my brain is always in a state of confusion.

In my math class, I used the newly learned mathematical formula to repeatedly calculate how long I could eat the little grain I borrowed at home; when I went to Chinese, when I came across the terms about food, my mind stayed in a daze; in the political class, I thought about the communist society, each doing its best to get what it needed... Grab something to eat; when I'm in gym class; I just lie in the classroom... I was hungry except hungry.

Seeing her diary, my eyes were moist, and I couldn't help but cry, Wang Chenglan! Wang Chenglan, in your case, why don't you tell the teacher? After such a long time, how come I didn't notice her every move?

　　I immediately ran to the classroom of my class, and Wang Chenglan lay quietly on her seat, her eyes closed, as if she was asleep.

I walked up to her and called out to her, and she moved her head with impotence, looked up at me, saw that it was me, and slowly lifted her head.

Without further ado, I pulled her up and walked to the canteen, where the cooker, Old Li, was cleaning the cooking utensils.

"Old Li, do you still have any food?" I can't wait to ask.

Old Li looked at me, then at the student in front of him, and asked in amazement, "Hasn't this student eaten yet?" ”

"Well, she just didn't eat." I'm busy saying.

"There is still some rice in that pot, but there is no dish, and when I come later, I will pour the leftover rice back and feed it to the pigs." Old Li complained while saying, "You baby, you don't eat on time, what are you busy with?" ”

I didn't make a sound, I used a bowl to scoop all the rice into the bowl, a big bowl full of rice, but there was no dish, I asked again: "Is there any watercress, this is also very rice." ”

"Hu Douban, there is a yes, in that bottle." Old Li said and took out half a bottle of watercress from the cupboard and handed it to me.

I put a little bit of Watercress in the rice and handed it to Wang Chenglan, who took a large bowl of rice with tears in her eyes and began to eat it with relish.

I gave Lao Li three or two meal tickets and said, "Is it okay to have three or two meal tickets?" ”

"Forget it, this meal will not be charged a meal ticket, give it to her to eat." Old Li pushed my hand to hand the meal ticket and said.

"Old Li, thank you." I turned to Old Li, then turned to Wang Chenglan, "Eat slowly, come to my office after eating." ”

I went to the office and continued to read other diaries.

After a while, Wang Chenglan came, I asked her to sit down, and I felt a stack of meal tickets from my pocket, which I bought in the food group and was ready to give it to her.

By the way, the school canteen is like this, managed by the school general affairs office, students bring rice to school, a pound of rice to make up for the difference of one yuan, and then exchange for a pound of meal tickets, students can eat as many pounds of rice as they want a week to school, in general, day students only eat lunch at school every day, eat three or two meals per meal, bring two pounds of rice six days a week is enough; each meal is a vegetable ticket, a dish triangle. In other words, students bring rice to school and spend 4 yuan a week. If the school teacher buys a meal ticket, he does not need to exchange rice, and two yuan can buy a pound of meal tickets.

Junior high school students live on campus, a week to spend 12 yuan, only junior high school students live on campus, school canteen morning, middle and evening are selling rice, I am too lazy not to want to cook, three meals a day to eat canteen, I generally buy a month's meal tickets, meal tickets a total of 48 yuan, vegetable tickets 20 yuan.

The meal tickets in the canteen are divided into one or two, two two, three two or three types, I counted the two weeks of meal tickets totaling 4 pounds, 12 meal tickets to her.

I said to Wang Chenglan: "Eat three or two times a day at noon every day, two weeks and twelve days, and 4 kilograms of meal tickets are almost the same." ”

"Thank you teacher, I don't." Wang Chenglan did not pick up the meal ticket I gave.

"Listen to me, you're going to have a problem being so hungry, you take it." I shoved the meal ticket into her hand, "After two weeks of eating, you come to me again, I will give it to you." ”

I learned more about the current situation of her family, and the family planning team came twice after that time, and saw that there was no oil and water to fish in the house, and it never came again.

She also knows that her father and mother have written to her father, saying that her father works in a coal mine in Guizhou, a month ago, there was a mining accident in the coal mine, her father's leg was crushed by the collapsed coal in this accident, and she is receiving treatment in a hospital in Guizhou, where her mother takes care of it, and there is no way to send money home to her family.

Wang Chenglan's family situation is really very difficult now, if it is all dependent on me to give her meal tickets for a long time, it is not a way, not to mention that there are still a few hundred yuan of tuition fees owed by students, although I have not calculated this fine account, my salary is nothing but food, and I can't think of any way to make up for it.

However, I did not start a family, my parents did not spend my money, although my life is bitter, it is only temporary, and I do not believe that I will continue to suffer like this.