We often see online who is a Dink family, who has a celebrity, who has an influencer, or who is a celebrity.
But you find that no, specific to the daily life of our ordinary people, it seems that there are very few real dinks around, most of them have children, just the difference between early and late.
So in fact, "Dink" is not an easy choice, choose Dink couples, or because of physiological problems, forced Dink;
Either two people agree on the same idea and voluntarily choose this life, and the latter needs more courage to face criticism.
Ordinary people who have chosen Dink for more than 10 years, how are they now, whether they regret it or are they more determined in their choice
I interviewed three people to hear their views.
Ms. Zhang, aged 41, head of personnel of a private company:
"I'm divorced"
When I first got married, it was my husband, no, now an ex-husband, who first proposed Dink.
My ex was three years younger than me and when we got married I was 26 and he was 23.
We went out shopping together and met a screaming and crying child in the mall, his eyes full of disgust and rejection.
He said, "I really hate kids!
Raising children, it takes energy and money, all kinds of troubles when you are a child, and when you grow up, you still fight against your parents.
When he was in his twenties, he had to give him a house, a car...
With that money, don't I spend it on myself? ”
At that time, when I heard my ex-husband's words, I felt a little relieved and a little happy.
Because I had a fear of having children at that time, and at the same time there was a feeling of "young and not enough to play".
After a few years, friends and girlfriends around them have children one after another, watching them worry and worry about their children.
And at the same age, I was the youngest I looked. When I was 37 years old, people thought I was 30 years old at most.
I thought happily that it was all because I chose "Dink".
However, at the age of 39, the ex-husband had a showdown:
"Sorry, I cheated on me, she was pregnant. Now I still think it's better to have a child, and the child is really cute..."
The "Dink" marriage of the past ten years has all become a joke at this moment.
Only then did I understand:
It turned out that he didn't want to have children, he just didn't want to have children with me.
It turned out that what he said was "no child is easy" was just a kind of self-deception.
Really having children, he did not hesitate to give up his marriage to me for more than ten years to start a family with a woman he had just known for half a year.
hehe!
After more than ten years of "Dink", I became a laughing stock, and he was full of life.
Mr. Yang, aged 47, technical director of an Internet company:
"Having children doesn't necessarily mean giving you a pension"
I find that many people who get married and have children now have a big misunderstanding, which can also be said to be delusional:
They always feel that after having children, they have "guarantees", and when they are old and can't get up, they will have children to help take care of them.
People with this kind of planning, find a mirror to look at yourself, do you think it is possible?
Now after the 80s and 90s, how many can take good care of their parents?
The pressure of life will only increase, and in the future, your children will also become middle-aged people with old and young like you.
At that time, you expected your child to take care of you?
Ask yourself, now between parents and children, you have to choose one to take care of?
Who do you choose?
The answer you have now is the answer for your child in the future.
The truth hurts, I'll stop there.
Anyway, me and my wife, Dink, have been living happily ever since.
Ms. Shen, aged 45, freelancing
"After the age of 40, you will understand that it is still happier to live with the current."
Before I was 40, the key word in my life was: rebellion.
I don't get married, I don't have babies, I just want to work hard for my career.
Now I am 45 years old, 2 sets of real estate in first-tier cities, a number of deposits, only two cats to accompany me.
Friends and girlfriends gradually have their own families, and they are not relationships that can be called out to meet at any time.
Do you know when people are loneliest?
It is you who work overtime until late at night, return to the home of the fine decoration, it is dark, cold pot and cold stove, talk to yourself, say a word, all bring back the sound.
At this moment, I finally understood why most ordinary people will eventually choose to live an ordinary life of marriage and children.
Why do everyone choose this?
In fact, there is an obvious reason:
For decades or even hundreds of years, thousands of ordinary people have used their only once-in-one lives to help future generations practice and prove a point:
This kind of life is the easiest way to get a sense of happiness!
What is an ordinary person? Ordinary people are people who are mediocre in appearance, family background, and personal qualifications.
In this life, I can't do anyone in this life, but when I was young, most people overestimated themselves and always felt that they might make unusual careers.
Don't be ashamed to admit your mediocrity, there is nothing wrong with mediocrity, and living a life in peace and stability is a journey that many people can hope for.
And ordinary life, the safest way is:
Studying, working, getting married, having children, this lifestyle can't go wrong.
It is true that good may not be much better, but it is not bad!
When you are 40 years old and have experienced the ups and downs of the workplace and society, you will understand a very important thing, that is:
In this world, "ordinary" is precious, and "stability" is scarce.
Live a similar life with everyone;
Talk to most people;
Live a "static" life every day;
Have a stable income, have a warm family;
Children grow up step by step, affecting your emotions, there are troubles and happiness...
These ordinary moments will form precious memories and prove that you have not lived in vain in this life.
discuss
Do you have a "Dink" family around you?
How are they doing? Regret or happiness?
Welcome to share in the comments section.