A recent video was heartbreaking to watch.
In the video, Grandma sells her granddaughter's puppy for 2 years to a dog dealer for 10 yuan.
Throughout the process, the child was crying and crying, trying to do everything he could, even beating Grandma, hoping to stop Grandma from selling the puppy.
Crying, she snatched the money from her grandmother and threw it to the dog dealer, trying to get the puppy out.
Even the dog dealer couldn't bear to look at it, and advised, "Don't sell it." ”
However, the grandmother smiled and hugged the child and took the money back.
Finally, the girl who had lost her puppy sat on the ground and cried desperately. According to her family, the child was so angry that he didn't eat dinner!
Later, I learned that this puppy was more fierce, worried about biting people, so she had to sell it, and Grandma bought a new one for the sake of the child.
However, obviously there is a better way to deal with it, adults still choose the simplest and most rude one, the new puppy may continue to give the child a good company, but the previous puppy that has been with the child for two years is different in the child's heart.
It may not be a puppy for adults, and as for it, the way the child cries even makes people feel funny, but for the child, it is not just a small animal, but also a friend who has been together for two years.
A netizen left this comment:
When I was a child, my father bought me a small chair and said that this chair was exclusive to me, so I had to take this chair with me everywhere I went.
Until one day, I had a quarrel with my parents, and my father smashed the small chair in a fit of anger, and I was suddenly frightened, until the next day I was crying.
Adults always think that the child's collapse is just a small thing, and in a few days or even a while it may be fine.
In fact, it is not, the things that have been injected with feelings by children may not be valuable, but they were once the sustenance of his feelings, it was all of him, and the pain of being destroyed and taken away from his life will not disappear after a few days, but will become a shadow for a long time.
To say lightly, it is the world of adults who do not understand children, and to say heavy, in fact, it is to disrespect children and treat them as small animals, rather than people with feelings and flesh and blood like themselves, and such adults are not uncommon.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" >01 Do not respect children, how to teach children to respect others? </h1>
Someone once shared such a story:
A middle school student is a fan of "Naruto", and in order to collect his hands, he has saved up pocket money and pressure money for a long time.
Although these handmade items were expensive for the students, the classmate finally fulfilled his wish and bought 28 Naruto souvenirs.
However, it was not long before the parents quietly gave away the treasures without his consent.
When he went to his parents to ask for advice, his parents were very dismissive and said that these toys are only played by children, he is so old, he should put his mind on learning, don't always worry about toys!
His parents' words made him cold and angry, and he wanted to explain to his parents that these handmade were not the toys in their eyes, but when he saw his parents looking high, he didn't want to say anything more.
However, he couldn't bear to think about the fact that his beloved hand was given away, so he thought of a "cruel move" and decided to retaliate for disrespecting his parents.
Since you destroyed my hand, then I will pour you Maotai! The classmate knew that his father usually had several bottles of precious Moutai wine, so he bit his teeth and poured out several bottles of Moutai wine.
Although he knew that these Moutai wines were worth a lot, but his own handmade was not cheap, and his parents let him taste the loss of love, then they must also experience this pain!
The result of this matter is undoubtedly a lose-lose situation, and there is also a crack in the relationship between father and son.
Coincidentally, another netizen also shared a similar experience:
Because he did not meet the test results in one test, his parents were so angry that he destroyed all 5 models he had worked hard for 3 months and was ready to pack and throw them away.
The adult's self-righteousness and indifference to the child are exposed in such a matter, and in a condescending posture, they do not take the child's feelings and hobbies into account, as if it is something that is not worth mentioning.
In the TV series "Little Joy", the encounter faced by Ying Zi is a true portrayal of the current Chinese parents' disrespect for their children.
Hideko is a Lego fan, she spent a lot of time to spell out the Lego, but her mother Song Qian ignored her pleas and fell to pieces.
Not only that, a simple sentence "Mother is all for your own good", Song Qian replaced the wall of Yingzi's room with transparent glass, just so that she could supervise her in an all-round way, completely disregarding her daughter's privacy.
In order to keep her child around, she will not hesitate to change her college aspirations!
After experiencing the ideal university can not go to, being supervised all the time, depression, 34 consecutive days of insomnia, the collapsed Ying Zi finally can not withstand the pressure and chooses to jump into the river to live lightly.
The famous psychologist Xu Tiansheng said: "All 'problems' are rooted in the fact that parents replace respect with control, command instead of inspiration, doubt instead of trust, so that children's lives can not find a way out, can not find love." A child who is not respected by his parents, his mind is twisted and deformed because he has not been stretched for a long time. ”
Respecting children is to see their emotions and needs, to treat them as individuals like us, however, many parents do not understand at all, and always ignore children, even if they muster up enough courage to fight, they will still be regarded as immature children!
There is a particularly suffocating clip in "The Boy Says":
A girl said with frustration that she had been writing novels since the third grade and had written more than 50 novels of more than 300,000 words so far, but all of them were torn up by her father.
When the girl said, "Losing the novel, it's like losing the soul", as the audience can't help but be sad, in that stroke, it is a child's imagination about the world.
However, so many painstaking efforts were easily destroyed by my father.
Faced with the question of "why", the father just smiled and said nothing.
And when the girl said: she just likes the liberal arts, maybe she has worked hard all her life, and she can't catch up with others in science studies, but her father finally has a response: "Others can do it, you can do it, dad believes that you will get the grades up."
The father seems to feel that nothing but study is important, and even if his daughter will be sad and sad, it is still not worth an apology, or even need to make any statement.
Until the mention of learning, he seems to wake up like a dream, it is no problem to break the child's dream, but the grade must be improved, and even if the child is good at science, it does not matter, because it is not good at it, it is not easy to do it, and if it cannot be done, it is no effort!
Preferences are not respected by parents, ideas are not seen by parents, and after a long time, maybe even they will feel that their ideas are not worthy of being respected.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" >02 How happy a respected childhood was</h1>
Huang Lei's daughter Duoduo has caused a lot of controversy because of "out of line" behaviors such as dyeing hair, painting nails, and piercing ears.
After all, in the eyes of many people, any dress and decoration in the student era is not compliant and will delay learning.
However, Duoduo's parents obviously disagreed, and Duoduo's mother Sun Li publicly responded on Weibo: "Loving beauty is the nature of girls, and we respect them." If you stop her now, she will be more rebellious in the future. She tried it and probably didn't like it in two days. ”
It is precisely because of the enlightened parenting style of her parents and the trust and respect for her children that Huang Duoduo can have so many attempts, she acts in dramas, plays the piano, translates picture books... Her life is not strictly confined to the framework, but very colorful.
Trust and respect children in the name of love, they can be nourished by love, live freely and confidently, and dare to challenge many unknowns in life.
The German psychologist Hurlbut said: "The child, we must fulfill the responsibility of parenting for him; at the same time, the child is not our child, because he is an independent and free individual, he has the right and unlimited possibilities to shape his own life." ”
In one such study, a foreign institution conducted a questionnaire survey of children from the United States, Japan, and China called "Who are the people you most respect?"
The most respected person for American children is the father, jordan second, and mother.
The most respected person for Japanese children is also the father, the second is the mother, and the third is Sakamoto Ryoma (hero of the Meiji Restoration).
In the hearts of the Chinese children surveyed, the most respected people are not parents at all, and parents are ranked last.
At that time, Spain's Efe Agency sent a telegram: "Many Chinese parents think that they are the best family educators in the world, but they cannot stop their declining status in the minds of their children." ”
Parents who don't respect their children may be losing their children's respect!