Everyone is familiar with the stepmother in "Snow White", asking the magic mirror every day! Magic Mirror! Who is the most beautiful woman in the world? She was very happy when the Magic Mirror said she was the most beautiful woman in the world. When she heard one day that Snow White was the most beautiful woman, she was angry and tried everything to kill Snow White and break the magic mirror.
So what prompted her to do this to this extreme idea? Psychologists give a rational answer and classification, this type belongs to high self-esteem, high self-esteem is also divided into safe high self-esteem and fragile high self-esteem. Snow White's stepmother is a fragile and high-self-esteem type.
In fact, we will encounter this type of person in life, which will bring us different degrees of trouble. Then through our understanding of professional knowledge, you will know how to deal with this kind of person. In life, it is not difficult for us to encounter roaring glass hearts around us, overeating lovelorns, self-obstruction makers in the name of modesty, to a certain extent, their self-esteem is at work. So how do you distinguish the behavior of these self-esteem people?
In the book "What Psychology: Why We Think This, Do That", Psychology Professor Chen Xiao, with his own unique perspective, combines professional knowledge with the stories around him to tell you a lot of things and why we think and do so. When you learn to interpret expertise from a macrosocial perspective, you also re-examine yourself.
In What Psychology: Think So And Do It, the author divides the high self-esteem type into two broad categories, the safe type high self-esteem and the vulnerable type high self-esteem. So in life, how do we distinguish between safe and vulnerable?
First, the safe and high self-esteem people who are not lethal
Ding Yue is an architectural designer, and she won second place in this competition because the upfront investment cost of her environmental protection ecosystem is too large, which will put a lot of pressure on developers. While her design style is appreciated by most people, developers have asked for lower investment in environmental systems. But Ding Yue insists on her own philosophy, and she believes that we should pay attention to the importance of ecological environmental protection. There was no compromise because of the ranking in the competition.
If it is recognized by everyone, she believes that it is a conceptual fit, not how high the design level is, if not agreed, it is also a gap in concept, which does not mean that her design level is not good.
Ding Yue belongs to the typical representative of safe high self-esteem, and her evaluation of herself is positive, stable, and does not rely on external evaluations, although she has encountered failures, but she believes that this is in a specific occasion, their focus and their own gap, does not mean that their ability is not good.
However, not all high self-esteem people around us have this trait, so let's take a look at what differentiates them.
Second, vulnerable high-self-esteem people with invisible lethality
We still use Snow White's stepmother as an example, she also shows positive, but unstable, susceptible to external evaluation. When such people are threatened by self-esteem, they will adopt various defense mechanisms to deal with it.
This type of person exhibits different behaviors of anger, aggression, alcoholism, anorexia, and other behaviors that harm others or harm themselves.
In fact, this kind of person has a very fragile glass heart, the appearance of a strong heart but the heart is broken, when encountering this type of person, we must pay attention to the way of speaking, to avoid becoming a broken magic mirror like the end. Life often hears that one party in a broken relationship will be such a self-evaluation: I am so good, you still can't look at me? It's you who are blind and do some extreme hurtful behavior.
By comparing these two cases, do you simply know something about this type of person?
In life, there are all kinds of people around us, and many conflicts occur because we do not understand the characteristics of these people and suffer losses. When you understand some professional knowledge from a psychological point of view, you know how to solve it when you encounter such an occasion. In fact, not all the expertise is obscure data and boring theories.
In the book What Psychology: Why We Think This way and Do That, the author cites a large number of case studies and professional theories. Like storytelling, you can easily learn the psychology trivia in life, so that you know it and why it is so.
Mastering these common sense not only improves their cognitive ability, but also reduces a lot of unnecessary friction, which is helpful for improving the happiness of life, in society and on the job, is it easier to deal with people? You can properly display self-esteem, face it with positive emotions, you can better maintain interpersonal relationships, happily devote yourself to work and life, and you will definitely achieve positive results.
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