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Marriage is like a stage, husband and wife are connected by heart, in order to perform tacitly.
But walking in the world, there are always some couples who gradually have such a clear understanding and care for each other for marriage. Gradually let the married life become, full of blame, complaints, suspicion... The appearance of the confrontation is like a deep sea of hatred.
Faraday once said: "Love is both synonymous with friendship and a reliable guarantee for our common cause, love is a good companion in life, and the reason why we can sleep with a beloved woman is because the common ideal binds two hearts together." ”
If the hearts of husband and wife are not together, they will go against each other.
The two people who are centrifugal always can't see each other's goodness, and feel that the other party is only harsh and unloving to themselves, and can no longer grow together. Obviously under the same roof, but there is no communication, no longer traveling together.
Couples who are not together are like strange roommates who share a room, and when the last bit of affection is exhausted, they begin to "move".
Readers Yu Tong (pseudonym) and Lü Wei (pseudonym) have been married for sixteen years, and during these sixteen years, Lü Wei always feels that Yu Tong is too "cruel" to himself.
Lü Wei always felt that Yu Tong grabbed the money in his hand, and the pocket money given to him every month was only two hundred yuan, and he had to ask Yu Tong for instructions before inviting guests to dinner.
In married life, Yu Tong is like dropping money in the eyes, reluctant to spend money, and living a very "hard" life. But later, Lü Wei's monthly salary was about eight thousand, but Yu Tong still lived a tight life.
If there is any opportunity to learn, Yu Tong also wants Lu Wei to continue to study and never let him idle.
After having children, his wife became more "fierce", and Lu Wei's time to rest became less and less, which made Lü Wei feel that his wife used him as a tool to make money.
On that day, Lu Wei learned that the unit was at risk of bankruptcy, and he was likely to usher in a midlife crisis. After work, he was in a depressed mood, and when he returned home, he found that today's dinner was boiled noodles again, and the soup was dull.
He couldn't understand why Yu Tong didn't make a good meal and couldn't spend a few dollars on vegetables. Looking at Yu Tong, who was wearing an apron and had dark skin, all kinds of complicated emotions made Lu Wei scold her.
Over the years, Lu Wei was not satisfied with Tong's various pickiness, and the two people did not quarrel less. After that quarrel, Lu Wei firmly wanted to divorce, and Yu Tong was disappointed and agreed to divorce.
At first, Lu Wei did not feel anything because of his wife's departure. However, in the six months after the divorce, he began to regret that he had not understood his wife's love.
Soon after the two divorced, Lü Wei lost his job and became an unemployed vagrant.
When the monthly bills came to him one after another, he was dumbfounded, and it turned out that the water, electricity, and living expenses of the family were so large for a month.
Lu Wei had to look for a new job, but the right job was not so easy to find.
Fortunately, in the past, Yu Tong let Lu Wei learn a lot of skills and did a lot of part-time work, which gave him a new craft. Lu Wei relied on his craft to find a stable job.
When life gradually stabilized, Lu Wei woke up. Yu Tong is not untrimmed, she is also a woman, but also loves beauty, just for this family, she chose to be harsh on herself.
Lu Wei usually spends money and has no concept, so many years, if it is not Yu Tong, the two people can not save money to pay the down payment of the house, and even can not let the child go to a good school.
After the divorce, Lu Wei understood marriage, and Yu Tong's "fierce heart" and evil were actually a kind of love. At that moment, he understood that a good woman would be so "fierce".
In the trivial life, gradually lost the original intention, gradually forgot the original vows, forgot to love the people around them.
Many couples always express love in the wrong way.
How many couples, in marriage, forget to understand each other.
From nothing to nothing to nothing to say, from falling in love to hurting each other. There is no understanding in love, the heart is not together, and the feelings of husband and wife are naturally weak.
In fact, in marriage, a good woman will be so "cruel" to you:
1: Life is "hard", and the money is fiercely grasped
Money is like a pillar that can support life.
A good woman will understand that it is not easy to make money, "hard" in life, and will spend every penny on the blade of the knife in the fierce grip of money.
She will talk to the uncles and aunts who sell vegetables at the vegetable market for a long time in order to be able to get a few dollars cheaper, and she will also carefully consider whether the value is worth buying before buying things.
Good women, always distressed that men make money is not easy, reluctant to spend money. Good women, unwilling to make hard earned money, squander it at will.
Even, women will be reluctant to spend money, do not let men have the habit of spending money freely, do not let men control the economic power, do not let you spend money freely, she will always make you think that she is a scrooge.
But in fact, she is holding the money in her hands and saving money for a better future for her family.
2: In marriage, always "fierce" to yourself
Good women, in marriage, are always "cruel" to themselves, do not buy expensive skin care products, do not buy clothes, do not pursue exquisite life, but focus on pragmatism.
Obviously, I liked the bag for a long time, and when I thought that this price could be worth the food expenses of a family for a week, I broke my mind. Thinking that a set of skin care products can buy children more sets of school supplies, I also bought the cheapest cream.
Good women, in marriage, are always "cruel" to themselves, reluctant to eat, reluctant to wear.
Let men think that she is stingy, will not live a life, does not know how to enjoy life, and does not know how to clean up and dress herself.
But even so, good women will be willing to "cruelly" wronged themselves. Because, that's a way for her to express her love.
3: Be cruel to your husband and force him to make money
A good woman, "cruel" to her husband, will not let him stay in the comfort zone, the will be slowly consumed, but will force him to work upwards, with a fighting spirit.
Chernyshevsky said: "The meaning of love is to help each other improve themselves. ”
A good woman will have requirements for her lover, will force him to grow, and always spur him to work hard.
The husband has the ability to grow and can earn more money in order to make a better future for married life. The stronger the ability of men, the stronger the resistance of men in the face of wind and rain.
A good woman will not easily get used to men, but will make him grow and make him more powerful.
Good women, "cruel" to their husbands, are all because they want to have a better future with him.
04. Summary
On the road of life, it is a blessing to meet a "fierce" woman, and it is also a happiness for each other. If you don't know how to cherish and misunderstand her kindness, you will be easy to centrifuge.
Tagore said, "Love is an alias for understanding." ”
The power of love can make people restrain their temper and change their habits. A good marriage, husband and wife, mutual understanding, mutual tolerance, are all working together for the sake of this home.
On the road of life, when you meet the right person, please cherish it.
The years do not come again, people will have many regrets in their lives, but do not miss the person who is really suitable for themselves.
It is easy to cool a heart, but it is difficult to warm a heart.
Men, women who are you, sometimes out of love, want to have a long-term future with you.
Good luck can not withstand the toss, meet the right person, please cherish. Don't start regretting it until you are really separated, some people, once lost, that is forever.
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Author: Xia Momo, a cutting-edge emotional tutor, psychologist, more than 1 billion popular emotional writers on the Internet, a happy woman management engineer, focusing on emotions, gender, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law for more than ten years.