Happiness
It is the ripples on the surface of a calm lake
It is the spark of the chaotic world
It is a butterfly that occasionally stays on the shoulders
It's the little bit that supports them to go down
Yamashita Academy tries to record the happiness group portrait of Chinese actors, and in the second season of actors' happiness, invite more actors to share with you.
In this issue, the person who shares the actor's happiness is Tian Yuan
Happiness, I really think this is a super big topic, I don't even know where to start talking, I feel that it is something that cannot be seen or caught, how can I use words to describe it? And how to get it? But at the same time, I am very paradoxically believed that, as the lyrics sing, those who can't be caught are true.
▲ Photo courtesy of: Tian Yuan
Before I get into the formal conversation, I have to admit that I haven't been happy in the last few years.
Since the past few years, I have been bent on becoming a director, but many people have not even seen your work, and just hearing the word "female director" will have an attitude of scrutiny and even skepticism.
A few years ago I started my own company, called Cat Field, and most of the time I spent some time shooting commercials, short films, fashion films, and other things that served customers. I learned how to make textured films on a small budget, how to make stars very beautiful quickly and well, and how to communicate with customers... Gradually, I took solving problems as my sense of accomplishment, and what was even more terrifying was that I deliberately suppressed a lot of my emotions, because I told myself: you are the director, the director is to balance, you must take care of everyone's feelings. So even if I encounter something very annoying, I don't lose my temper, I don't dare to complain, I don't want my bad emotions to make the whole working group feel, so most of the time it is a person who silently solves various problems.
Growing up, I would put myself in a "shell", and I think many people would probably use this mask to hide their true feelings like me, because it would be safer. After becoming a director, I slowly put on a mask called "director". But it's really sad, if you want to make a good work, you can't have this mask, because the work is honest, you will see the essence of the creator directly in the work.
By 2018, I was really a little tired and very panicked, and looking back, it seemed like I was busy all year round, but I didn't have a handy work.
It was at this time that I walked into Yamashita Academy, and I really loved my teachers, they were so cute and crazy. What did they teach us? Without teaching written things, all the teachers are playing games with us, making us unscrupulously put down all our manners to "curse", let us release the devil in our hearts, and let us stare into each other's eyes and then slap each other. These are all part of the acting exercises that make us give up language, give up so-called thinking, and use only the body to do the most direct reaction.
I am very grateful to the teachers at Yamashita Academy, all of whom let us face our feelings instead of suppressing our emotions.
Once during class, I took a leave of absence to go to work, encountered some unhappy things, in fact, it was not aimed at anyone, if in the past I would have endured and then continued to finish the work.
But that time, all of a sudden, I yelled inside the elevator, and a friend next to me later told me that I felt a wave of noise at that time, and I was about to be ejected. Miraculously, after that roar, I was released, and I was particularly happy to continue the work below, and I felt that the whole person's work efficiency and state were better than before.
My tantrums are not directed at anyone, I just let the naturally generated feelings flow, and this feeling is like a child, if a child gets a candy, he will get the whole world, and then laugh with great joy. But if you take one of his things, he will cry for an instant until it gets dark. In fact, there is no opposition, only mutual achievement, happiness and sadness are really the same thing.
▲ Tian Yuan participated in the closing report of the first professional actor acting advanced class of Yamashita Academy
I remember once in a clown class, there was a part that made us laugh and couldn't stop. We laughed for a long, long time, and felt the abdominal muscles all laugh and hurt. And then the teacher said do you want to cry now? I remember all the people lying on the ground, and we all had our eyes closed, but gradually I heard the sound of sobs coming. Everyone's tears couldn't stop leaving out. Because crying and laughing are the same thing in themselves.
The course under the mountain was actually a very good psychological counseling for me. I have experienced a lot of unhappiness, unhappiness, and frustration before, but I dare not share it with people, I will feel that there is no face, and I will appear to be not strong enough, not strong enough, not capable enough. But in fact, your vulnerability is often the most beautiful thing for you. If you dare not show your wounds to people, then in your works, there will always be a lack of a kind of truth.
▲ Tian Yuan at Yamashita Academy
I think the so-called happiness must first recognize and face their own unhappiness, because they are not the opposite of happiness, they are happiness itself. I'm also really grateful to Yamashita Academy for giving me a lot of new insights into acting that will open up a lot of doors for me. Acting is really not acting, but letting the body and mind enter a role, using this body, using this way of thinking to face the opponent and the environment.
I think if the FM of the body has been adjusted to this role, then precision is no longer a problem, in the past we often discussed it in a special academic way, this performance is not accurate enough, but in fact, if you enter the role, everything you do is accurate. I also feel that design may always be second-rate – of course, this does not mean not using skill, but technique is ultimately used to elicit the most authentic, undesigned state and reaction.
▲ Tian Yuan's work photos of participating in the TV show "City of Illusion"
In fact, most of the time we are thinking, not doing, always feel that we can only do it if we understand it. But in fact, acting is like gambling, the more you invest, the more you don't think, the more you don't think about the return, the more you do not care about it, it is possible to get more, it is possible to bring unexpected stimulation to the audience.
On the other hand, only when the body acts, the mind has more possibilities. But most of the time, we don't really respect our bodies and our feelings. The body and consciousness are not opposites and are not separated from each other. Or that "opposites" themselves are an illusion, and the so-called "bad" will eventually let us see the other side of it, that is, "good"; the so-called unhappiness may also eventually achieve our happiness. This may be what I understand as happiness.
Shared by: Tian Yuan