Feng Tang said in a letter to his daughter:
"You have to be rich inside to get rid of these superficial similarities. Cooking soup is more important than writing poetry, one's own craft is more important than men's, hair and waist and chest are more important than faces, and being strong inside is more important than anything else. ”
In today's era, women have to work in the workplace on the one hand and the family on the other, and bear great pressure.
Only with a strong heart can we be full of joy and anger and lose strength.
So, what kind of woman can be called a woman with a strong heart?
It depends on whether she has these three qualities.
01
Work hard, but not anxious
Some people say that today's era is an era of contradictions.
When we talk about Buddhism, we are extremely anxious in our hearts; our hearts are extremely anxious, but we do not see effort in our actions.
However, a woman with a strong heart will not do this.
They will only follow their own rhythm, persevering, step by step to get closer to the target.
When Hollywood First Lady Ingrid Bergman first entered the film industry, she encountered huge setbacks.
She did not expect that her proud healthy body and tall figure would be laughed at by everyone, and some people even ridiculed her as a physically strong cow behind her back.
In show business, where everyone desperately wants to be famous, Bergman did not choose to go with the flow, nor did he struggle to find a shortcut to get ahead.
Instead, he silently honed his acting skills, even refused Hollywood-style heavy makeup, and insisted on acting in a natural way.
Finally, Bergman's efforts were not in vain.
Later, she won 7 Oscar nominations in 44 years from the film and stood on the Oscar podium 3 times.
From then on, when someone dared to laugh at her 1 meter 78 size, she could finally respond domineeringly:
"In Hollywood, there aren't many men who can look down on me."
In fact, many times, the reason why we are anxious is not because there is no result in hard work, but from a heart that is unwilling to do our best but is anxious to succeed.
But, as Goethe said, "The true meaning of life is not to erupt like a volcano, but to be as inclusive and weighty as the sea." ”
A truly strong woman does not care too much about temporary gains and losses, but can withstand the loneliness on the way forward.
People who are really strong in their hearts will always believe that time is long and will always be willing to wait for the flowers to bloom.
Because they know that as long as we move slowly in the right direction, one day, we will always live as we want.
02
Learn to look up, and learn to bow your head even more
Some people say: There are only two principles for life in the world, that is, to learn to bow one's head as a person and to learn to look up when doing things.
However, in life, there are too many people who only know how to look up, want to compete for everything, and are not willing to be left behind.
As everyone knows, people who only look up are only strong in the outside world, winning but can't afford to lose, and can't afford to take it but can't put it down.
Only those who learn to bow their heads can do the three thousand things in the world and smile indifferently.
Hu Die, the first beautiful woman in the Republic of China, was once looked up to by a boss, Dai Kasa.
Dai Kasa wanted to take her for himself, so he managed to capture Hu Die's husband.
In order to save her husband, she committed herself to Dai Kasa for three years.
During the days of house arrest, Hu Di was with someone she didn't love every day.
She could have died, but she didn't.
She knows that only by enduring today can she look forward to tomorrow.
In the desperate situation of life, Hu Die gave birth to unprecedented courage.
In the chaotic world, she and Dai Kasa skillfully maneuvered to save her husband and the life of a family.
Just as Dai Kasa was preparing to marry Hu Die, an air crash killed him.
With the sound of the explosion of the plane, Hu Die's three years of captivity also came to an end.
How easy it is to die, how hard it is to live.
Compared with Hu Die's patience, Ruan Lingyu's suicide by swallowing medicine seems to be more decisive.
However, the humble heart bamboo has a bowed leaf, and the proud bone plum has no back flower.
Without these three years of bowing down, there would be no stability in the second half of Hu Die's life.
Learn to bow your head, not to concede defeat, but to wait for the opportunity to break the cocoon into a butterfly.
Learning to bow your head is not giving up, and bowing your head represents calm maturity and ingenious wisdom.
People with strong hearts know when to look up and when to bow their heads.
So it can be rigid and flexible, and there is a degree of progress and retreat, so that life has more toughness and more tension.
03
Be kind to yourself and be kind to others
Freud once said:
"This life of man is a process of reconciliation. Reconcile with yourself, reconcile with others, reconcile with the world. ”
A woman with a strong heart can find an outlet for her heart that has nowhere to rest.
Learn to be kind to yourself in times of adversity and be kind to others in times of good times.
However, in real life, there are very few people who can really do a good job of the word "kindness".
Many people feel sorry for themselves and abandon themselves when they encounter setbacks, but they are arrogant and arrogant to people when they are in the scenery.
As everyone knows, all the luck of a person is hidden in kindness.
Only by understanding the wisdom of "kindness" can we close the road of life and advance and retreat appropriately.
Ping'er in "Dream of the Red Chamber" is the most powerful handmaiden around Wang Xifeng.
However, doing things next to the powerful Wang Xifeng was not as easy as imagined.
Once, Sister Feng's husband, Jia Lian, was fooling around with people and was hit by Wang Xifeng on the spot, and the two got into trouble, and both took Ping'er out of anger.
Poor Ping'er was angry at both ends and innocently beaten twice.
"Dream of the Red Chamber" 39 times, Ping'er once revealed: "(Sister Feng) first accompanied four servants, dead and dead, going to go, only I am a lone ghost." ”
Bao Yu also said: "Jia Lian's customs, Feng Jie's power, she (Ping'er) can be thoughtful and appropriate."
It can be seen how difficult Ping'er's situation is.
But although life was difficult, Ping'er never complained about herself.
She not only laughs her grievances and unwillingness, but is also willing to reach out to help others when she is in a difficult situation.
After Sister Feng tricked her husband's concubine, Sister You, into the Grand View Garden, she secretly instructed her servants to abuse Sister You.
Sister You was pregnant and had not eaten a fresh meal all day.
Ping'er couldn't see past it, often carrying Feng Jie to send her things, and often talked kindly.
Unfortunately, Second Sister You was still abused in the end and swallowed the gold and died.
The fierce Feng Sister did not even give the silver for the funeral, and as a result, Ping'er took out the silver and sent Sister You's last journey.
A woman with a strong heart, more or less.
She knows how to be kind to herself, willing to forgive, willing to let go, and know how to be kind to others.
Because she knows that a person who can be blessed must have light in his eyes, love in his heart, and kindness in his bones.
04
Bi Shumin once said:
"Life is glorious, if a small flower in the mountains has the fragrance of the hand, a piece of rotten wood will be dirty, then our life can also diffuse the taste." 」
People who are really strong in their hearts are not those who are aggressive and bullying.
Rather, it is those who can live their ordinary days and find light in difficult situations;
It is those who live themselves as a light that illuminates themselves as well as others.
For the rest of your life, may you also become a woman with a strong heart, keeping your heart soft and peaceful in this complicated earthly world.
May you always have courage and hope to face the rain, snow, wind and frost in the future;
May you embrace the warmth of the world, and never have to wait for others to love you, but can love yourself hard.