In today's society, due to the busyness of work, parents and children get along with the time is pitiful, in the face of children's education, we parents are also unable to work, work in the company during the day, need to solve the problem of work, at night after returning home also need to help children's homework, and even go home to solve some problems at work.
Over time, there is less and less time to accompany children, and it is impatient to educate children. There is a great spectacle in our education: a child, as long as the grades are good, then nothing is a problem with him. If the grades are not good, then there is no problem and I will create some problems for you.
Some of our parents will often say to their children:
"Is that what you should be thinking?" Studying well is the right thing to do. ”
"As far as you are concerned, it is impossible." "Unrealistic, don't think about it."
In such denial, our children begin to become less confident and no longer dare to fight and express themselves. The childhood trauma caused by these repressions to children is like a brand, and no amount of scrubbing can be erased.
The success of parenting depends on whether children are able to successfully integrate into society when they grow up. Therefore, with the development of society and the changes of the times, parents' education of their children should also keep pace with the times.
When it comes to educating children, I have to say that Ying Cai'er, the way she educated her eldest son Jasper is particularly good, and she has now given birth to a second child, who is also a son.
Someone asked Ying Cai'er in "Listening to My Sister": "With a second child, will you be biased towards a certain child?" ”
Ying Cai'er said: "Because my brother is younger, I will take care of it a little more." ”
But she would say to the boss Jasper, "I'll always love you 7 years more than my brother." ”
In a family with a second child, I have never found any parent who says this to the eldest, and the words spoken make the child very warm.
In a variety show, we found that the textbook parenting style of Ying Cai'er is really worth learning from all of our parents.
As we all know, Jasper is a small warm man, but also very easy to learn, only 7 years old, he has learned a lot of shooting skills, at home with the director's team of small camera shooting video.
He asked his brother to play the Flash, and he commanded his grandmother in a similar way, and many people were amused to see Jasper's side. But because he didn't buy The Flash's clothes, he felt that the video he shot was not perfect, so he took a gamble and deleted all the videos he shot.
Jasper liked The Flash's clothes very much, but Ying Caier did not buy them for him. In the face of the always serious Ying Caier, Jasper did not dare to squeak, and he did not have the heart to eat when eating, and later he went upstairs alone to return to his room, thought about it, and quietly apologized to the program team with a walkie-talkie. Seeing this scene, this is not at all like what a 7-year-old child can do, and I have to say that Ying Cai'er's education is very successful.
After the apology, Jasper himself vented his emotions in the bed, probably feeling that he was wrong and a little aggrieved, but after reflection, Jasper's actions surprised us, and he took the initiative to say "sorry" in front of every shot in the family. Netizens said that adults may not be able to do it. After making a mistake, you may not be able to recognize your mistake and apologize.
Later, he returned to the dinner table and apologized to his mother. Taking the initiative to face mistakes and take the initiative to bear their own mistakes is also a way to cultivate children's stress resistance. Today's children are basically happy in childhood, unlike our previous lives, so Ying Caier is worried that Jasper will "explode" when he encounters something in the future, and does not want him to be crushed by difficulties casually.
If you change to an ordinary child who is not well educated, he will be angry with adults and not eat, or earlier, he will start crying when he does not get the Flash clothes.
In fact, many of our parents also want to educate their children, but even if they exhaust all their methods, they still can't manage it, which is a headache for parents.
In the Ark of Harmony, many of our students have similar problems, even more serious than this. They learned a discipline of applied psychology, the relationship between parents and children became more and more intimate, and the children's grades gradually improved, from rebellious children to sensible, understanding, and distressed children, and from parents who did not understand children to parents who were considerate, understanding, and knew how to let go. Seeing so many families flipped, we feel happy and proud from the bottom of our hearts, which is also the motivation we have been doing.