1. On a bus somewhere, an uncle with a foreign accent handed the conductor 10 yuan and said, "Have you seen it (Jianguomen)". The conductor was very angry and took out a 100 yuan bill in the ticket pocket and said to the uncle in a loud voice: "Have you seen it?" ”
2. Played with a group of colleagues in the water park last night. During the period I went to the toilet, when I came out, I saw a female colleague wearing a swimming goggles, sneakily walked behind a strange man, and put the man into the pool with one foot, I laughed, walked to the female colleague and asked: "What, met an acquaintance?" Only to see her violently take off the swimming goggles full of water mist, look at me in shock and say, "Why are you still here?" Who is that who fell into the water? ”。。
3. Girls are especially rich. One evening, a young lad was particularly warm to her. "You're so wide." He kissed her and said. "Yes," she admitted frankly, "I'm worth $1 million." "Can you marry me?" "No." "I expected that." "Then why would you ask?" "I just want to experience what it's like to lose $1 million when a guy loses.
4. When washing hands today, I saw the school canteen master digging the nostrils and continuing to stir-fry without washing his hands, reporting to the principal, the principal said to deal with it seriously, and did not expect to hang a sign the next day that idle people are exempted from entering.
5. The young man goes to visit the master and asks him for advice on the way to peace of mind. The master did not say a word, first went to chop firewood, then fetched water, put the firewood into the stove and lit it, boiled the water in a large pot, and carefully wiped the teacups one by one. The young man suddenly realized: "You mean to be good at experiencing life from the details of life." The master put down the work in his hand and said calmly, "I just went to work and am busy, don't bother me."
6. There is a roommate who wears steel braces. When it came time to strike lightning, he bit his lip and did not speak. Even laughing is biting the lip. Later, I was really curious and asked her. She said: "My teeth conduct electricity...
7. A new colleague from the unit is called Hao Lian, who is fresh and pleasant as his name. After returning home, he said to his husband: We are going to have a daughter and call it Lotus, how nice it sounds. The husband came slowly: You forgot my surname Liu....
8. The boyfriend is not very good at coaxing people, I told him, how good are you to set my photo to the screen of the mobile phone, you can see me as soon as you open the screen. He said: Then every time I slide the screen to unlock, it is not the same as every time I smoke you!