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Author| Yang Xiaomi Editor| Swallow
Source| Meet Xiaomi(ID: yujianxiaomi2015)
I'm 33 years old, and I feel like time flies so fast, but I love every year I'm 30 years old.
When Mr. Liu ordered a birthday cake, he said that he wanted to write "Forever 18", but I refused.
I didn't want to go back to 18 years old, when I was still in high school, financially not independent, and there was a lot of confusion about the future, I could recall, but I didn't want to go back.
I have a lunar birthday and I'm not sure what day it is in early October every year, but this time it's on the eleventh holiday. When friends propose to give me a birthday, I think the holidays are fun, don't toss it, blessings received, this year's birthday, on me and Mr. Liu two people to live, very good.
This birthday, it was very warm, and it was also very tacky, cakes, flowers, gifts, hahaha.
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A birthday gift that makes Mr. Liu "bleed"
On this year's birthday, Mr. Liu did not send a bag, but gave Tiffany's necklace and stud earrings, all of which were diamond-encrusted and sparkling, and I liked it.
He said: "The last festival in 2021, buy you two, hope to be happy to the New Year." ”
I teased him, "Is your heart dripping blood?" ”
He said, "It's not just dripping blood, it's bleeding." ”
I have long passed the age of pursuing luxury goods, but when I received a gift from Mr. Liu, I was still very happy and felt my husband's heart.
During this time, I was in a very average state, because of work, I had an emotional breakdown once, and I cried at home.
I was very touched that Mr. Liu cared about my emotions and was willing to make changes in order to make me happy. Buying these gifts does not conform to Mr. Liu's concept of consumption, he thinks that girls always like beautiful and beautiful things, I will be happy to have these, and then, he will convince himself that he will buy me bags and jewelry every year.
After his birthday, he was still calculating, saying that these gifts required him to pay a month and a half, and he had to continue to work overtime. After all, the second half of the year, the performance is better, and the year-end bonus can get more points.
Such a Mr. Liu is really cute, he is meticulous, but he is willing to "throw a thousand dollars" for me.
He is pragmatic and low-key, but he satisfies my "pompous" taste in life.
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Buy cheap roses,
Mr. Liu is so happy
I am a very pompous person, like flowers, in the words of my parents, flashy, is to do, really like, plant two pots at home is not good?
The pragmatic Mr. Liu also has this attitude, but he sends me flowers every festival and chooses different flowers according to different festivals. (Mainly depends on the price, hahaha)
I received 52 roses from him on my birthday this year, very bright, very beautiful, I like it.
▲Roses sent by Mr. Liu
He shared his joy with me: "Today's roses are really cheap, 3 yuan a flower, a total of 156 yuan, bought such a big bouquet. If it is Valentine's Day and Tanabata, it will be hundreds. ”
Mr. Liu's happiness is always different from others.
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4 inch cake
I don't like sweets, especially cakes and the like. Mr. Liu said that the birthday cake was bought to meet the scene, and the two of us did not specifically find a cake shop to order it.
Mr. Liu found a good rated cake shop, made a 4-inch, people sent a pack of candles, so that it is not wasteful, but also cheap.
▲ 4 inch birthday cake
The cake was small and ritualistic, and I turned off the lights in the house, and I made a wish and blew out the candles.
Mr. Liu lives a meticulous life, a little bit of a small door, I appreciate it from the bottom of my heart, life is not like this, spend the least amount of money, reach the goal, happy will not be less.
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Mr. Liu actually had to cook
Mr. Liu did not have a whim on his birthday, but raised it for a while, and I rejected this matter.
Before, I complained more than one article, my husband has many advantages, but he is not omnipotent, he is a kitchen white. It is no exaggeration to say that he cooked noodles, all of which I taught.
He was also aggrieved, saying that I doubted his determination to cook, and since he was so insistent, I still did not discourage his enthusiasm.
I also said that I would not participate in the whole process, giving him full freedom and room to play.
I was really worried about his level, and in order not to go hungry, I bought my favorite bread (baguette) in advance to pad my stomach.
▲ I have already eaten a few pieces of bread that I bought
Lawyer Yang Ying, a good friend, ridiculed me, "You are not an idol drama at all, people's plots, no matter how unpalatable, you must boast and eat." ”
Really don't underestimate a man's determination to do things, it's scary.
On my birthday, Mr. Liu was really busy, in the morning and the decoration captain on some decoration details, and went to the building materials market to set the cabinet, back home to eat lunch are 2 o'clock.
He took a nap, went to the supermarket alone, bought a lot of vegetables, and prepared to make cabbage pork stew noodles and steamed fish.
▲Mr. Liu's achievements
He followed the online instructional video to do, objectively speaking, the first time to cook, the taste is OK, he chooses stews and steamed vegetables, are very smart practices.
I didn't eat much, he was almost finished eating alone.
The first time he cooked, he had a great sense of accomplishment, he said that cooking is too simple, nothing more than the difference between delicious and not delicious.
Mr. Liu is really a bully and learns everything quickly.
Why did he suddenly have to learn to cook? It turned out that his eldest brother and second brother could not cook before, and now they can cook, from time to time in the family group to dry, he feels that he should also learn, the power of example is really too great.
I immediately sent Mr. Liu's results to the family group, told everyone that he could cook, and blew a lot of rainbow farts.
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Marriage is a journey of healing
In the past two or three years, friends around me have lamented the changes in me and Mr. Liu.
Let's start with me.
I met my lawyer sister Qiqi in 2015, the first two years, we basically saw once every 2-3 months, she said that every time she can draw energy from me, she will be more motivated to struggle after she goes back, but with me often, it is too stressful.
In the past 3 years, we have been playing together every day, and she has no pressure, she said: "Sister Mi, you have changed, in you, I can no longer see anxiety, and that feeling of having to succeed, it was not bad before, now it is better." ”
Another good friend, Da Ya, said that she used to think that it was a waste of my time to talk about work with me, and in the past two years, it was very interesting to chat together.
▲ Feedback from Da Jia
This change must be related to age, in 2015, I was 27 years old, and now I am 33 years old, and the years will always change a lot of people, many things, look open, will also be put down.
I know that what made me change the most was the marriage thing, the intimate relationship, which really healed my inner uneasiness and anxiety.
To be precise, entering marriage has made me explore this part a lot more, plus I am a psychology student, able to perceive the problem, and then seek professional help, constantly reflect, and change happens day by day.
So, what about Mr. Liu?
In my eyes, he has no bad places, what he is not good at, I think it doesn't matter.
He said: "I almost believed, I am the most handsome person in the world, and when I look in the mirror, I find that I am almost there." ”
Mr. Liu's shortcomings are obvious, he has social phobia, he never sends a circle of friends, because replying to a message may require thinking for 5 minutes.
He's socially, quite passive. Usually classmates and colleagues take the initiative to contact him, he is very enthusiastic, but he will not take the initiative to contact others.
When the leader talks to him, he will be fine, will not ask for anything, and will not say too much about his achievements, in fact, he wants to end the conversation quickly.
He did not like to deal with people, and he did not like to talk more, and his ideal occupation was to go to the Forbidden City to repair cultural relics or repair home appliances.
At work, this helps him, he is in charge of research and development, and can obsessively work overtime to solve a problem. This is also the reason why he has worked for several years and his annual salary has increased several times.
I think Mr. Liu is very powerful, but he is very low-key, I think it is nothing, I am very ordinary, and some super powerful people are far behind. Every time I praised him, he was embarrassed.
He refused to see any of my friends and didn't participate in parties and socializing. We got married, and neither of us sent a circle of friends.
He doesn't want his life to be disturbed, and if I want to take my colleague home for a meal, I do his thought work 2 weeks in advance and ask for his consent.
For the things he didn't want, I accepted them calmly, and I didn't force him. Where he did well, I would find out every time and praise him.
I watched him become more open little by little, I had a lot of friends, he had met, and chatted with people very well. Everyone found him particularly interesting and insightful.
On my side, my parents also felt his changes, and felt that in the past two years, he had been a lot more cheerful and very good at chatting.
He trusts me very much and is willing to tell me anything. This should be love, no matter how introverted one is, also wants to enter into an intimate relationship.
Our marriage, I think, is a healing journey that heals each other, and both of us change in a good direction.
I really especially thank Mr. Liu, since I was 26 years old, he gave me every birthday with his heart, I think the previous life must have saved the solar system, only to meet him.
I am 33 years old, have Mr. Liu, have family, have friends, and I feel very lucky.
I often remind myself that we must know how to cherish, and cherishing can last.
PS: Regarding the career part, I wrote a separate article, which is particularly heartfelt and a big reflection this year.
My good friend Da Ni asked the question: "You are so ambitious, looking at new directions for 1-2 years, why haven't you made it bigger?" ”
This birthday essay is not so heavy.
Yang Xiaomi: Founder of Self-media [Meet Xiaomi], author of the book "Action Realization", graduated from the psychology class, settled in Shanghai, Shandong people, 3 years from ordinary staff to marketing director, and entrepreneurship, sharing workplace experience and growth stories.