The ancients had four views to see if a person could be surrendered:
"Watching people in the face of wealth, watching people in distress, watching people in neglect, watching people after drinking."
Money can't measure everything, but money can measure the quality of people.
Attitudes toward money often reflect the principles and bottom lines of how to behave in the world.
Interests, see the hearts of the people;
Money, character.
People with good money and good taste, love money and have a way to get it, and they are stable and reliable in the world, and they can communicate with them with confidence.
My high school classmate Xiao Wu, who majored in computer science, also has a high level of programming.
Friends and family who have problems with their computers will ask him for help.
Small problems he could solve quickly, slightly more complicated, would take a day or two to solve.
Some people will express their gratitude verbally, and some people will send a small gift or send a small red envelope in return.
However, the behavior of a relative made Xiao Wu very helpless.
A few years ago, this relative started a timber business and asked Xiao Wu to design a website for him.
Xiao Wu spent a week to complete the production, the website was successfully launched, relatives took it and used it directly, never mentioned the cost, and said:
"We are so close, it is common to talk about money."
In fact, to do such a website, the market price is thousands of yuan, Xiao Wu is hindered by love, it is not easy to say anything, can only comfort himself:
Let's take it as an opening gift for relatives.
The website worked well, relatives made a lot of business, and the next year they wanted to continue to use it.
Xiao Wu told him bluntly this time:
"That would require a renewal fee of $600."
Relatives say:
"I'll give it back to you", but there is no following.
After a while, Xiao Wu specifically reminded him that the renewal fee should be renewed as soon as possible within the validity period, because maintenance, server rental, etc., all need to be paid to third parties.
Relatives took care of him left and right, but they did not see real money and silver to take out.
Originally a website made by Xiao Wu for free, he is now determined not to advance money for others to maintain operations.
So after the website expires, it naturally can no longer be used smoothly.
Unexpectedly, relatives began to complain to relatives and friends about Xiao Wu, the meaning of the words outside the words, is That Xiao Wu, a professional, is not good at stumbling on a website.
Xiao Wu could no longer stand such a person, nor did he bother to explain more, and directly stopped coming and going.
You know how to repay the favor, understand the etiquette and exchanges, this is called maintaining friendship;
You sit back and enjoy it, and you have to make inches, which is called taking advantage of others.
When it is time to swipe the card, but play the emotional card, use human feelings to "brush the face", treat the relationship as currency, it seems to have achieved the purpose, in fact, the feelings between each other have been exhausted.
Bank card overdraft, timely repayment can restore the limit;
The unlimited overdraft of human feelings will break the love between each other little by little.
Saying goes:
"Man tests with wealth, gold with fire."
Money can not only see people's hearts, but also verify the truth.
In a humane society, borrowing money to repay money seems to become an unavoidable thing.
The person who lent the money, identified the friend, and delivered the trust;
Those who borrow money and do not repay it trample on friendship and lose their integrity.
Borrowing money is affection, and repaying money is character.
I think of a story shared by netizen @Dong Ruohan:
Liqing and Zhou Lei are good friends, Zhou Lei once borrowed 60,000 yuan from Liqing for the company's turnover, when Zhou Lei promised to pay back half a month, but half a year passed, but he did not have the slightest intention of repaying the money.
At first, Li Qing was hindered by the situation and did not collect the bill, but his mother was hospitalized due to illness and urgently needed money, so he had to mention the matter of repaying the money with Zhou Lei.
Unexpectedly, Zhou Lei said that recently the company has been in trouble again, and it really can't come up with money.
But a few days later, Liqing accidentally saw a photo of Zhou Lei's family visiting abroad at another friend's place.
Li Qing was furious and questioned Zhou Lei, but he did not expect that Zhou Lei was very angry:
"This is a reward tour for my wife's unit, I owe you some money, and I won't stare at my whereabouts!" Go back and collect the money to pay you back! ”
However, what Li Qing was waiting for was not money, but a chill.
Zhou Lei still did not pay back the money, and what was even more excessive was that the information sent to him by LiQing was not returned, and the phone calls he had made in the past were also rejected.
Liqing finally couldn't bear it anymore and ran to Zhou Lei's company to make a big fuss, Zhou Lei was afraid of being "looked at by the jokes" by employees, so he chose to calm things down and return the money to Liqing.
After this incident, Liqing and Zhou Lei completely cut off contact. Friends also said:
Paid money and sincerity, but in exchange for a dead heart.
In a similar situation, Qian Zhongshu once lamented:
"Call yourself a friend before borrowing money, and your uncle after borrowing money."
It's really an image to think about.
A person who does not even pay back money is even less likely to give back the affection and warmth given by others.
Debts are seen in the hearts of the people, and money is repaid in character;
Don't lose the hearts and minds of the people, and then lose the character.
Between one loan and one return, you can clearly see the cold and warm of human feelings, and the character is high.
Money is the best "mirror" of a relationship, and it is also the "touchstone" of the best character.
There was a question on the Internet:
"What are the characteristics of people with poor character?"
Among them, there are only three words in the answer that receives high praise:
"Poor money."
Adult socialization is inseparable from the exchange of money.
People with poor money and quality will definitely have a great discount on their character;
And people with good money get along with it like a spring breeze.
In the book, the writer once told a story of his own experience:
Wanqing runs an online shop for a boutique lifestyle pavilion.
One day, a supplier called her to apologize, saying that when the new sample was sent, it accidentally made the freight on delivery, and wanted her to provide an Alipay account number and return the money to her.
Evening feeling that a dozen yuan is not a big deal, and 95% of the samples sent here will be eliminated, the supplier itself also has a cost expenditure, and the postage is paid by her side, and it does not matter.
The supplier looked at her insist and helplessly put down the phone.
However, the next day, the company's employee in charge of e-commerce received a WeChat red envelope, which was sent by the supplier, indicating that it was the returned postage.
The team's friends felt that the supplier was too serious, and the postage of more than a dozen dollars was just that.
But at the same time, after this period of cooperation, everyone also found that they are indeed very reliable, professional and serious, always very active in solving problems, never prevaricating and making excuses.
Now, combined with this "freight incident", it can be said that it truly confirms that sentence:
"People with good money and good character will not be bad."
Later, the cooperation between Wanqing and them was indeed pleasant and stable, smooth and long-lasting.
It can be said that when a person walks in the world, character is his passport.
And good money is undoubtedly the best blessing of character.
Maybe a dozen dollars is really not much, but behind it is the principle of being a person.
Zeng Guofan once sent a message to his three younger brothers:
"Brothers, in the future, do not take advantage of others in everything, and do not take advantage of people's wealth lightly, remember."
Money does not distinguish between good and bad, and human nature is beautiful and ugly.
Whether a person is reliable or not is hidden in the attitude and details of money.
The lowest act of emotional intelligence is calculation;
The greatest shrewdness of being a person is kindness.
This is the generosity and transparency of adult socialization.
It is said that talking about money hurts feelings, in fact, it is not money that hurts feelings, but the heart that wants to move and wants to take advantage.
Reliable relationships can withstand talking about money.
Taking the initiative to talk about money when interacting with people is precisely to keep each other's sense of proportion;
The more clearly money and affection are divided, the more stable the relationship between friends.
The writer Lian Yue once said:
"People who don't talk about money will never mature."
Among adults, the best state of getting along is "not stingy to talk about love, bold to talk about money."
Talking about love is not fake, talking about money is not embarrassing, will make each other's friendship longer and more reliable.
Author | Cornices, personal public number: the text of the cornices.
Image | Visual China