If you haven't heard of the legendary Mary Sue novel Fifty Shades of Grey, or downloaded the various HD preemptive resources for the movie Fifty Shades of Grey on the dial, you're really out of the way.
A brief summary of "Fifty Shades of Grey" is the story of the heavy taste sadomasochism between Anastasia Steele, a pure (bai) love (chi) female college student, and Christian Gray, a domineering president with special sexual fetishes. With its popularity, BDSM, a word that was once a bit "invisible", has also been introduced into the mainstream discourse and gradually become familiar to the public.
1. What is BDSM?
Since the word "SM" is included, BDSM is certainly inseparable from sexual abuse. It is a collection of the initials of several phrases: bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadism and masochism.
SM in the narrow sense is limited to abuse and abuse. In other words, in fact, BDSM is the real name of the incarceration, bondage, and tuning that we see in various films.
BDSM's role is more explicit than that of ordinary sexual abuse. In the game, the two sides will always have a role, this role can be interchanged, but in the game its identity is very distinct, that is, the dominant party and the subordinate party must have a clear division. In short, BDSM is a rigorous, role-oriented sex game, and its technical content and stimulation far exceed ordinary abuse.
Psychologist Sandnabba (N.K.) and others in a literature review published in 2002, sorted out 40 BDSM behaviors, of which the "Fifty Shades of Grey" played out the bandage (Bandage), flagellation (Whipping), handcuffs (Handcuffs), accounted for 88.7%, 82.8% and 74.7%, respectively, all of which were listed in the top 5 common items. In terms of role play, the most common is the master/slave (55.9%), followed by uniforms (38.8%), teachers/students (29.1%), executions (23.6%), hospitals (15.7%), and rape (13.5%).
Second, is the common sense of BDSM in the movie correct?
Many friends who watched the movie "Fifty Shades of Grey" couldn't wait to buy a small leather whip and small handcuffs when they went home, and prepared to play with that little fun. So the question is, is the use of sex toys BDSM? Is the common sense of BDSM conveyed in the movie correct?
1. BDSM must be willing to do so, otherwise it is a crime. There is a plot in the original novel where the heroine says the word safe (i.e. the subject feels uncomfortable and asks the other party to stop the scene), but the hero does not listen and continues... This is a big taboo in the BDSM circle, and crossing this line is abuse. In particular, it is reminded that many friends who like to watch SM abuse should not be misled by this.
2. In the movie, the male protagonist finally tells the female protagonist that he was so perverted because he had abusive psychological trauma when he was a child, that is, the meaning conveyed in the movie is that hobby SM is a pathological behavior. Well, this is wrong. The activity and imagination of SM was once considered a pathology by psychiatrists, but in the Fourth Edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV) in 1994, the American Psychiatric Association revised the definition of SM as a pathology, and the voluntary SM behavior that did not cause significant mental pain or interpersonal communication disorders in the perpetrator was no longer regarded as a mental illness.
Why do some people like SM? In fact, it is the same as some people like to play badminton, but some people prefer to play table tennis. All are personal hobbies.
3. BDSM doesn't have to be a real snap, it can even be no sexual contact at all, but both parties can get excitement and pleasure from it.
4. BDSM is not as beautiful as it seems in the movie, but it is also not as scary as imagined. Trusting each other and being comfortable is the most important prerequisite.
5. Not all BDSMs are black wire, high heels, leather whips, eye masks seen in TV series or movies... Although props are indispensable, the skills of S and the surrender of M are the most important yo ~~
6. Many people think that BDSM is violent, painful, disturbing, and wrong. Sex lovers are not forced to engage in sexual activity and do not develop feelings of unhappiness or anxiety. Studies have found that consensual acts of sexual abuse often increase a couple's intimacy.
7. Warning: In the absence of in-depth understanding, BDSM is exclusive to the sexual behavior patterns and preferences of this group, and it is good for laymen to see the hilarity.
You know, the author of "Fifty Shades of Grey" was an ordinary 40-year-old middle-aged mother when she wrote this book, with a decent life, and she had never experienced BDSM at all. I also hereby remind the little sisters who are confused by the overbearing president after watching the novel and the movie, and be vigilant against those bad people and strange people who play BDSM!
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