I am a more introverted person, belonging to the kind of person who is willing to hide behind everything, from childhood to adulthood, I am a cheerleader role in various races, even taking the bus is waiting for others to get on the bus after I finally get on.
My wife is a very outgoing person, usually the family relies on her for everything, and it was for this reason that I chose her at that time.
I originally opened a grocery store, the business is not bad, but the business in the past two years is obviously not good, on the one hand, my personality seems to be not suitable for business, and these two years of physical stores are really difficult to do, and in the end it is difficult to continue to close the business.
After getting married, my wife never worked a day, when I opened the store, she was at home in the store, and she rarely went to the store to help, and all day long she either went to dye her hair with this girlfriend or went shopping with that friend, but at that time, the income was still good, and she didn't go to her heart. Later, I had a child, although the child was mainly brought by the grandmother, but after all, she was the mother of the child, and she did not want to work.
But now it's not ok, my pressure is too great, I found a warehouse manager job, the monthly salary of 4,000 yuan is not enough for our daily expenses, she still looks indifferent, asked her if she does not consider the future life, she said to take a step to see a step, if you have money, you will spend more money without spending, what is the use of being anxious.
The key is not to be anxious or not, but to have requirements for yourself and to plan for the future! Otherwise, where is the direction of life, and what goals and ideals are there to talk about?
A few years ago, I saved some money in business, my wife lent my father-in-law 100,000 yuan, Lent my brother-in-law 70,000 yuan, plus my father spent a lot of money when he was sick, and there was basically nothing. Now the pressure is getting bigger and bigger, many problems that we didn't care about have jumped to the surface, and our contradictions are also increasing, and the old saying that poor couples are right to mourn.
The first time we did it was when she was going to a party with her sisters, who often had a party, a group of fox friends, and every time these men and women were drunk and cost a lot of money each time, I stopped it many times, and she said that I was interfering with her freedom. This time I was very adamant about saying that I didn't agree, she was just angry at first, and then she actually ran over and kicked and hit, I pushed her away with force, she saw me push her away and went crazy to the kitchen to find the knife, and then ran to me to compare, of course, she didn't really cut me with the knife, but this nature is different, I took advantage of the situation to grab the knife and throw it out, and then threw her two slaps, she cried while scratching my face with her fingernails, and finally I let her scratch twice to level it, which stabilized her.
This kind of thing seems to become a habit after the first time, and every time there is a conflict, we are used to using violence to solve the problem, and then the two people who often engage in it are all wounded.
The most recent time was that she wanted to go back to her mother's house I did not agree, because the number of times she went back to her mother's house was too frequent, three days and two ends to go back to live for two days, the distance between the two families is not particularly far, half an hour drive, she goes back to those small, neighbors eat and drink with each other, making people talk behind their backs, but she does not care, but I want to face ah!
She said that before going back to her mother's house, she made dumplings for me to eat, and when she saw that I did not agree with her going back to her mother's house, we quarreled at that time, and she suddenly spilled a bowl of noodles on me, and then hit me with the rolling pin in her hand, I was also beaten, and a big slap directly knocked her down, and she lay on the ground and cried how she did not get up. Finally I apologized and let her beat her up, but she went home anyway.
I wanted to know what she was going to do when she always went back to her mother's house, so I didn't tell her to sneak past her, I was more than 8 o'clock in the evening, my father-in-law and mother-in-law were not at home, knocking on the door for half a day was a lady's door, at this time I found that the living room of my mother-in-law's house was a mess, full of leftovers and wine bottles, the floor was covered with cushions, the wife fell drunk on the ground, next to a man who was also drunk, the man also put his hand on his wife, and then there were girlfriends who had grown up with their wives, and they were all drunk unconscious. There were four people in the room, three women and one man, only one woman could get up and open the door for me, and no one else could move.
I couldn't bear to see this scene, I used my mobile phone to shoot this scene and hurried home. The next day my wife came back, when I proposed the divorce she was very surprised, and repeatedly said that she did not agree to the divorce, but I had decided, I am really tired, do not want to live such a life, the so-called grudge to stop it.
Now my wife has moved to her mother's house, but she has been sending me messages and asking people to persuade me not to divorce, but I have decided that I do not know whether it is right or wrong to do so, but I am willing to bear the consequences of both right and wrong, better than the current torture.
But frankly speaking, sometimes there are still a lot of worries, and there will be contradictions and entanglements, am I right to do this, will I regret it in the future?
Teacher Yi Shun said:
Seeing your encounter the teacher really feels sorry for you, although the text does not elaborate on your life, but I have already felt the chicken flying dog jumping and full of chicken feathers, anyone in it will be haggard and miserable.
Poor couples are right, but what is more terrible than poverty is that the two of you have no mind to run a life, in fact, neither of you has devoted any thought to your life, and there is nothing but resentment and indifference between you.
You must feel wronged, but from another point of view, your wife may not feel happy, and both people in this relationship are unfortunate.
There is no point in pursuing who is right and who is wrong, just as personality, habits, and values are out of tune. As for whether you will regret that no one can give an answer, we make a decision not only to look at the present, but also to look at the long term, to see how to make you feel at ease near and far.
Go with the feelings and don't regret your decisions no matter what. Man, can afford to put it down!
This article is original by Teacher Yishun, welcome to pay attention, take you along with long knowledge!
I am Yi Shun, a professional manager, a history teacher, a literature lover, a walker, a tree hole
Multi-angle interpretation of emotions, multi-window evaluation of life, thanks for the attention!