Text/Pan Caixia
In 1966, Liu Shaotang, a "rightist representative," bid farewell to his wife Zeng Caimei and his three children and returned to his hometown from Beijing for reform. This year, he was 30 years old.
He began to publish at the age of 13, and when he left, he was a "child prodigy writer" with unlimited scenery; today, he is "a typical example of the degeneration of young writers", not only the right to create is deprived, but the novel "Golden Canal" was also returned before printing, and he is forced to pack his bags and "return to his hometown in chaos".
A bloody storm made Liu Shaotang's fate intersect with Yang Guangqin.
Liu Shaotang
< h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right" > dark clouds are gilted</h1>
After returning to the village, on the first day of work, Liu Shaotang bowed to the crowd. No one knew that there was a girl in the team who was excited.
Years later, she still vividly remembers his image at that time: "Wearing a garment of labor cloth, wearing a large straw hat, wearing black elasticated plastic sole cloth shoes on his feet, tall and clean, and at first glance he is an intellectual." ”
The girl's name is Yang Guangqin, 15 years old, and she is in the second year of junior high school. The political movement spread to the campus, the school was closed, and she temporarily returned to her hometown to work.
Since childhood, her grandfather's canal story has grown up with her, and she naturally admires and worships Liu Shaotang. Seeing the legendary great writer suddenly so depressed, her heart was full of mixed feelings.
The situation is urgent, people are afraid, Liu Shaotang wants to use labor to numb himself, but his physical strength and skills are not as good as an old lady with small feet.
His loved ones were far away, his future was hopeless, he lived in a dark, cold house, he was lonely and miserable.
In 1968, Yang Guangqin officially left the school and returned to the village to be responsible for selling vegetables in the vegetable garden.
After work, there were many people buying vegetables, Liu Shaotang consciously hid at the end, and when it was his turn, there was often nothing.
Out of sympathy, Yang Guangqin left the dishes for him in advance, sometimes, let him come to the door to pick them up, and sometimes, send him to his home.
One day, Liu Shaotang walked alone on the road. On the other side, Yang Guangqin came over, and in the sun, she carried a wicker basket, and two large braids were rhythmically flicked around.
Suddenly, his heart beat faster and he was stunned.
Yang Guangqin
Yang Guangqin is only 17 years old, she has no interest in politics, she does not understand what "rightist" means, and she never avoids Liu Shaotang.
When she came and went, there was more conversation, and when she was not working, Liu Shaotang often went to her house. In the dark night of life, she gave him warmth and comfort.
When he sighed that "the day is like this night, not until dawn", she comforted him: "There will always be a dawn, you like to write, just continue to write." ”
The dark clouds above his head were suddenly set with gold edges, and on the paper, Liu Shaotang solemnly wrote down the word "琹".
He said to her, "This '琹' is what we all have in common, because we all have a Qin character (Liu Shaotang's nickname is Baoqin), I lack wood, and your surname is Mu (Yang is next to the wooden character). ”
<h1 class= "pgc-h-arrow-right" > give him hope like a mast</h1>
The faith was rekindled, and Liu Shaotang began to secretly write novels.
A week later, the novel "Confidant", which describes love on campus, was finished. Unexpectedly, after Reading it, Yang Guangqin said bluntly: "This novel is not well written, and it is particularly far from our lives." ”
Liu Shaotang also wanted to write the story of the canal he loved, but he did not dare, and from time to time there were people around him to monitor, and if he was discovered, he would be guilty of another degree.
"What's not to dare, what's the matter, I'll block you!" Yang Guangqin's words made his eyes wet.
A few days later, on the road to work, as soon as he saw Yang Guangqin, Liu Shaotang ran up and stuffed her with a note. Above are six words: I am your Ruan Mei.
"Ruan Mei" is the name of the protagonist in "Confidant". His intention was obvious, and he wanted them to be confidants of each other.
Since then, Liu Shaotang has begun to write letters to Yang Guangqin non-stop, almost every day. If the letter could not be handed over to her one day, he would secretly tear it up and throw it into the canal, letting the flowing water take away those thoughts and worries.
Young Liu Shaotang
At the age of 19, Liu Shaotang got married and had children at the urging of his parents, which was more of a responsibility to the family. At this moment, the innocence, kindness, bravery and fearlessness of "Qin Meizi" touched his heart.
From her, he gained strength. When they cut the corn cob together, only by looking at her figure could he persevere in the heavy agricultural work.
Liu Shaotang regarded Yang Guangqin as a source of spiritual dependence and strength, and when he learned that his family had arranged a blind date for her, he was nervous and afraid, and begged her: "You promised me, don't leave." ”
Although Yang Guangqin never wanted to destroy his family, after getting along for a long time, his hot heart made her unable to refuse. She said affirmatively: "You can rest assured, I am not leaving." ”
Liu Shaotang was immediately excited, and he took out the unfinished manuscript of "Wolf Smoke" and said: "With your support, I can write a good novel, and I will sort out this fragment." ”
Influenced by Liu Shaotang, Yang Guangqin also began to read and write.
In the leaky hut on all sides, they talked about "Quiet Don River" together, talked about Lu Xun, and when talking about "Dream of the Red Chamber", he said that she was "like Qingwen, frank and cute".
Works by Liu Shaotang
With the support and companionship of Yang Guangqin, Liu Shaotang no longer gave up on himself and decided to conceive the novel "Mast Top".
He said to her emotionally, "You are the one who gives me hope like a mast." Seeing you, like a traveler on a long journey, just when you are tired and your steps are heavy, you see a cool willow shade in front of you, and the small flowers that open quietly in the depths of the willow shade, and your mind is clear and refreshed. ”
He named the protagonist "Fluttering Incense", which means "Three Autumn Guizi, Ten Miles of Fragrant". And her nickname is "Guixiang".
Excitedly, he spoke incessantly:
"In the world of canal home, we are closer than anyone else in our hearts. Your pure heart intuitively understands my good and bad and my sins, just and affectionate. You little person has a very subtle effect on me..."
Touched by his words, Yang Guangqin was also extremely excited: "You write well, I support you!" ”
The tired body and mind are soothed, and the picture scroll slowly unfolds. After writing a few paragraphs, Liu Shaotang read it to Yang Guangqin.
When she said something bad, he immediately corrected it; when she clapped her hands and praised it, he happily circled around her; when it was time for her to leave, he stared at her reluctantly.
Since then, Liu Shaotang has seen hope and has a direction: "I want to complete the ambition of my youth in the land of our canal hometown - to write a multi-volume novel." ”
He will take Yang Guangqin as the protagonist, making her "richer, more magnified, more perfect, more cute, more ideal" in the novel.
<h1 class= "pgc-h-arrow-right" > temperament stops at reality</h1>
Because of her good family composition, strong work ability and cultural foundation, Yang Guangqin was elected as a broadcaster and secretary of the league branch, and the village cadres had high hopes for her.
In 1973, the village recommended her to apply for the university, on the condition that: "Take the lead in fighting Liu Shaotang, even if the political trial is passed." ”
Yang Guangqin did not obey, in exchange for the result: "Re-examine and investigate." ”
The second year, the third year, the same thing. In order to protect Liu Shaotang, she gave up the opportunity to go to college three times.
After Liu Shaotang learned about it, he said bitterly: "I am sad in my heart, I am too uncomfortable, too torturous!" ”
Despite gossip and worldly pressure, Yang Guangqin still accompanied him and continued to tell him the story of the village, adding inspiration and material to the novel.
Liu Shaotang had nothing to repay, only to create more diligently. Tired of writing, he looked at her picture.
One day, Liu Shaotang looked at Yang Guangqin affectionately and couldn't help but blurt out: "You are my wife!" ”
In the face of her surprise, he explained:
"In this world, you have a confidant, a person who breathes with the same destiny, a person who is spiritually closer than flesh and blood, like two trees with tangled branches and inextricably growing together.
Two hearts clinging together, joined together, and forged into one. I am your spiritual husband, you are my spiritual wife, completely taken for granted, is there any doubt? ”
In the face of affectionate confession, Yang Guangqin was very calm: "I don't agree, three children, she is alone with hard work, you are worthy of her?" ”
She knew that their love could only be temperamental, not realistic.
Liu Shaotang with his wife and children
Under the encouragement and protection of Yang Guangqin, Liu Shaotang's literary career was not abandoned, and he successively completed the first drafts of three novels: "Earth Fire", "Spring Grass" and "Wolf Smoke".
In 1979, he returned to the literary world and returned to Beijing. At that time, Yang Guangqin was already a 28-year-old girl.
Still eager to start a family with her, he said in his letter:
"Let us not give up lightly, and we must seize the time, love more clearly, love more deeply, so as not to end up like Qingwen's cry to Jia Baoyu before she died: If we knew this, why should we bear a false name."
He even envisioned an ideal life after marriage:
"On the side of the canal, a few bright small rooms, a clean courtyard, the courtyard is lush with flowers and trees, and the vines and roses are as green as umbrellas. We worked together, read, wrote, rested, entertained, and had children.
You are the first reader of every one of my works and every text, and in family life, I want to be a husband who will be very sad about you, you must be a gentle and sensible wife, and live a scientific, civilized, hygienic and modern pastoral life. ”
However, Yang Guangqin would rather take on a false name. She stepped forward when he needed to; his fortunes improved, and she quietly retreated.
In order to give him peace of mind about his career and family, at the end of 1980, she quietly married.
After learning the news, Liu Shaotang was very angry, and in the letter, he said breathlessly:
"You leave me and marry another man, and if that man treats you well, my pain may be alleviated, and if that man treats you badly, my heart will bleed with pain." 」
He deliberately came to Yang Guangqin's home and was finally relieved when he saw that she was living happily.
Later, he created the novel "Rural Wind", in which the Juan sister who was favored by her husband was based on Yang Guangqin.
"Qin Meizi" gave Liu Shaotang creative inspiration, and after the publication of "Pu Liu RenJia", it once caused a sensation in the literary world, and there was Yang Guangqin's shadow inside.
He said: "Most of my vernacular novels are based on the village, people have archetypes, things have provenances, And Sister Qin is a witness to witnessing it, and she helps me to be full, rich and full of all the deficiencies I write." ”
With his outstanding works, Liu Shaotang became a famous writer of local literature, and many works have been translated into foreign languages, which is famous all over the world.
Yang Guangqin, on the other hand, always silently blessed, never publicized her relationship with him. Even his letter, she did not repeat a word.
In 1996, after receiving the news that Liu Shaotang was seriously ill, Yang Guangqin replied to the only letter in decades:
"If age can be exchanged, and the sick body can be replaced, I am willing to accept the challenge of the disease, overcome the disease for you, and make up for your lost youth years..."
A few months later, Liu Shaotang died. In the last letter, he said: "You know a lot about my life in Rulin Village, and I hope you will write it and publish it. ”
His last wish, she had always remembered. In 2013, "Peace of Mind is home - Me and Liu Shaotang" was published, and the feelings of youth and suffering are still vividly remembered, and all the efforts and fulfillments, she has no complaints and regrets.
If the heart is at peace, it is a sunny day.
Liu Shaotang and his wife Zeng Caimei