Before reading this article, I sincerely invite you to click the "Follow" button, so that you can continue to push such articles in the future, and it is also convenient for you to discuss and share, your support is the driving force for us to insist on creating~
This article is fictional, and the names of people, places, or other aspects involved in the text have nothing to do with reality (without any implications). If there is any similarity, it is purely a coincidence, please read it rationally.
#长文创作激励计划#俗话说, "The blessed do not enter the door of the unblessed." If you want to be happy after marriage, you have to rely on the insight of your mother's family before marriage. Parents who marry their daughters are also heartbroken in order to "choose a good mother-in-law" for their daughters.
Some people say: To judge whether a man is worthy of marrying, you can't just look at how good the man's family is. The most important thing is to see if the mother-in-law has given her daughter-in-law "three things".
What are these "three things"? Why can it be the standard for judging whether the in-laws' family is good or not?
First things first: respect
Mutual respect between people is the most basic principle of getting along. The famous director Ang Lee once said: "In the relationship between husband and wife, respect is more important than love." "It's the same between a mother-in-law and a daughter-in-law.
The mother-in-law is the elder of the daughter-in-law, and it is self-evident that the daughter-in-law respects the mother-in-law. But at the same time, as a mother-in-law, you should also respect your daughter-in-law.
Girls who have not yet married into their mother-in-law's family, if they do not feel respect from their mother-in-law, it may be the wisest choice to withdraw in time.
So, what is the respect that a mother-in-law has for her daughter-in-law? And where is it manifested?
Last year's variety show "Love's Study Trip" was launched, and many celebrity couples were invited as guests. Among them, He Youjun and Xi Mengyao, who are the most affectionate and married, have become the focus of people's attention.
The reason why people pay attention to this pair, on the one hand, is because He Youjun is the son of the famous "gambling king" Stanley Ho, and on the other hand, it is because in comparison, Xi Mengyao, a model from a "low" background, how is she doing after marriage.
Facing reporters' questions, Xi Mengyao said bluntly: "My husband and I are happy after marriage, and I can't do without the respect of my mother-in-law. ”
Xi Mengyao was very nervous in her heart before meeting He Youjun's mother.
Although Xi Mengyao was born as a supermodel, she felt that the gap between her family background and the He family was too big, and she was engaged in a "humble" profession in the eyes of wealthy families. Even her age is older than He Youjun.
For various reasons, Xi Mengyao is very worried about He Youjun's mother and her future mother-in-law will "look down" on her. Unexpectedly, when they met for the first time, Xi Mengyao was fed a "reassuring pill" by her future mother-in-law.
It turned out that He Youjun's mother had already done a good job of "back adjustment" before meeting Xi Mengyao. She not only inquired in many ways and learned about Xi Mengyao's character, but also understood Xi Mengyao's eating habits and life hobbies clearly.
And in order to make Xi Mengyao not so nervous, He Youjun's mother had already prepared a piece of frosted glass before meeting her future daughter-in-law, so that the two could talk through the glass.
Xi Mengyao saw all this in her eyes and warmed her heart.
After getting married, He Youjun's mother gave Xi Mengyao enough respect. The things in life are never mixed, and the two of them never ask about their birth plans.
But she is not "unconcerned" about Xi Mengyao, at the beginning of this year, she specially arranged for Xi Mengyao to cut the ribbon on her cruise ship. In the He family, the woman who cut the ribbon as a daughter-in-law was the only one Xi Mengyao.
Just a few days ago, a reporter took a photo of Xi Mengyao and her mother-in-law going to watch volleyball together. Xi Mengyao and her mother-in-law in the photo are really intimate. It can be seen how good the relationship between the two of them is between their mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
The second thing: preference
In various novels, we can often see the heroine marrying into a wealthy family, but being made difficult and overly harsh by her mother-in-law.
But in reality, no matter whether the man's family background is good or bad, before marrying, he should also carefully observe the mother-in-law's attitude towards the future daughter-in-law.
If the mother-in-law takes her daughter-in-law to heart, even if the family background is not too good, the daughter-in-law will be blessed to marry. However, if the mother-in-law "doesn't look down" on her daughter-in-law, no matter how good the man's family background is, he can only suffer if he marries.
When it comes to "caring for his daughter-in-law", the most famous in the past two years is "Xiang Tai" Chen Lan.
Today's Chen Lan is often revealed to be very "loving" Guo Biting in life. But before that, Chen Lan has always been known for being "vigorous and resolute" in the emotional issue of her son Xiang Zuo.
Although it seems unimaginable now, before Xiang Zuo and Guo Biting got married, Chen Lan forcibly "broke up" Xiang Zuo's 7 relationships.
Xiang Zuo, who was born in a wealthy family, and his previous love partners can be regarded as "celebrities" in the Hong Kong circle, such as Ying Caier, Cecilia Cheung, etc. But these relationships didn't last long, and they were all broken up by Chen Lan "ruthlessly".
It is precisely because of this that at the beginning of announcing their relationship to Zuo and Guo Biting, the outside world was almost not optimistic about their relationship, and felt that Chen Lan would definitely step in and break up the two.
Unexpectedly, Chen Lan, who was "cold-faced and selfless" to her son's other love objects, had a blue eye for Guo Biting. In the face of Guo Biting, she changed her "vigorous and resolute" style in the past, but she favored Guo Biting very much.
Why did Guo Biting get Chen Lan's preference? In addition to being beautiful, Guo Biting's usual enthusiasm for public welfare and animal rescue also made Chen Lan have a good impression of her.
On a show, Guo Biting said that she was "not sociable". Chen Lan on the side said to her almost without hesitation: "You are not pretending, not pretentious!" ”
Chen Lan is not only in front of the media, but also does not hesitate to praise and praise Guo Biting. Even every time Guo Biting posts on Weibo, Chen Lan is always the first person to comment at the bottom.
Later, when Xiang Zuo and Guo Biting were preparing for their wedding, Chen Lan did it herself, preparing more than a dozen luxurious wedding dresses for Guo Biting, as well as expensive jewelry.
Later, even Guo Biting gave birth in the delivery room, and the person who accompanied her was not her husband Xiang Zuo, but her mother-in-law Chen Lan.
Chen Lan's praise and maintenance of Guo Biting in front of the media; Caring and caring in life is a kind of "preference".
"Preference" of this kind of thing, you can't pretend.
The superficial "love" may be out of politeness, or there may be some purpose. Only the undisguised and difficult to conceal "preference" is truly worth cherishing.
The mother-in-law's "preference" for her daughter-in-law is a kind of recognition and love from the bottom of her heart. And the mother-in-law who is "preferred" to her daughter-in-law is likely to be a more reliable guarantee of marital life than a man.
The third thing: tolerance
"If a person is not a sage, who can do nothing", after every daughter-in-law marries into her mother-in-law's family, she will inevitably do some wrong things and say some wrong things. In married life, it is difficult for anyone to avoid making some "small mistakes".
But in the face of some small mistakes of the daughter-in-law, whether the mother-in-law can be "tolerant" is a point worth considering for the woman's family.
Similar to Xi Mengyao, the famous Hong Kong star Li Jiaxin also married into the Hong Kong wealthy family, the Xu family.
Li Jiaxin's mother-in-law, Jian Xingchun, is known as "Mrs. Xu". She has aroused public opinion several times before, all because of her "generosity": for example, she once threw more than 5 million just to hold a birthday banquet for her grandson, shocking the whole Hong Kong.
Until Mrs. Xu's death, the assets of the Xu family had reached hundreds of billions. But Li Jiaxin, who married into such a wealthy family, married life can be described as a tribulation.
Mrs. Xu adheres to the traditional idea of "wealthy", and was quite dissatisfied with Li Jiaxin, who was born in the entertainment industry, from the beginning. At the wedding of Li Jiaxin and her son, she was even black-faced and watched coldly.
After that, Li Jiaxin had another "small problem": she couldn't get pregnant. Facing the media, Li Jiaxin said bluntly: "I want to find someone to 'borrow my belly to give birth', and I don't want to suffer the sin of being pregnant for ten months." ”
was originally an understandable sentence, but it suddenly ignited the anger of her mother-in-law, Mrs. Xu. She directly found the media and released cruel words: "If you don't have children, get out!" Afterwards, Li Jiaxin and her husband went to bow and apologize in person, and the matter was barely resolved.
In 2021, Mrs. Xu passed away. After Mrs. Xu died, Li Jiaxin revealed to the media: When Mrs. Xu was alive, she also set up 8 "family rules" for Li Jiaxin, and strictly implemented them for decades.
As soon as the 8 "family rules" were revealed, netizens were extremely surprised, and they sighed: "Where do you still take Li Jiaxin as a family member, it is clear that you are using her as a 'servant'!" ”
In the face of this kind of mother-in-law, daily life can't even talk about "worry-free", let alone "happiness". Even if the family has a lot of money, where is it possible for Li Jiaxin to live a good life after marriage?
epilogue
To marry a man, the respect, preference, and tolerance of the in-laws are indispensable. As a mother's family, when a daughter wants to get married, she needs to be strict.
The "gatekeeping" here refers to the "gatekeeping" with foresight and a view of the overall situation.
When a daughter gets married, the mother's family must not only stare at the visible bride price and three golds, but also focus on whether they treat their daughter as "their own person".
If you don't have respect, how can you talk about a happy marriage? If you don't get favoritism, how can you talk about a happy mood? If there is no tolerance, how can there be peace in life?
If you don't give these "three things", don't marry!