As the saying goes: "Asking for people is like swallowing a three-foot sword, and relying on people is like going up to the nine heavens." It can be seen from this that ordinary people who lack strategic skills will encounter great subjective and objective resistance in the process of "entrusting others to do things". But people are social animals, and in interpersonal interactions, it is inevitable to entrust others to do things. So how do you make this seemingly difficult thing easier? This requires you to master some strategic skills. The author has studied strategy for many years, and has carefully analyzed the detailed process of those strategists in history who "entrusted people to do things", and I personally believe that the following four points are the real points of operation.
1. Find an "inescapable" reason
As the old saying goes: "If the name is not right, the word will not go well, and if the word is not good, the thing will not be done." "So when we ask someone to do something, it's important to have an inexorable reason. As long as we can find such a reasonable reason, then naturally we will become "famous" for "making demands" from others. So what kind of reason is "unshirkable"?
The author believes that at least the following points must be met: First, he must be satisfied. The reason should be specific and targeted (specific to the other person), and make it clear that only he has the conditions and qualifications to do this, and no one else is suitable. Second, it is beneficial and harmless. Describe in detail what kind of benefits he can bring to himself by doing this, and what kind of value and rewards he has. And resolve the other party's possible concerns in advance. Third, the operation is simple. Everyone loves to do simple things and hates troublesome work. So even if it's complicated, at least you have to make it simple.
A typical case is that in the section of "Romance of the Three Kingdoms" where the grass boat borrowed arrows, Zhuge Liang chose the reason when he asked Lu Su for help, and strictly followed the requirements we talked about. First of all, Zhuge Liang emphasized that Zhou Yu wanted to assassinate him, and only Lu Su could rescue him; secondly, he only asked Lu Su to prepare ships and straw men for him, and not let him do anything contrary to his principles, so that he could get the great merit of 100,000 arrows; In the end, he only asked Lu Su to drink and have fun on the boat with him and not do complicated things.
2. Find an "unavoidable" opportunity
As the saying goes, "Don't miss the time." "Choosing the right opportunity to entrust someone to do something can also greatly increase the success rate. An unavoidable opportunity to make it more difficult for the other party to refuse our request. So how do you find the right opportunity?
The author believes that there is one point that we need to pay special attention to, that is, we need to have a keen observation and grasp of each other's time arrangement, emotional state, etc. For example, when the other person is in a happy mood and relatively relaxed, it is often easier to get a positive response. Be careful not to disturb others when they are busy, stressed, or in a bad mood.
At the same time, we seize some key moments and create some special opportunities. For example, in the activities they participate in, they can't help but put forward "cooperation suggestions" when the atmosphere is harmonious; Or after the other party has achieved something, express our request and show recognition of their ability in a timely manner.
After all, a typical case is that on the eve of the Hongmen Banquet, Xiang Bo visited the Han camp at night in order to repay Zhang Liang for saving his life. Zhang Liang took advantage of the situation to introduce Xiang Bo to Liu Bang, and Liu Bang seized this golden opportunity to take the initiative to form a family with Xiang Bo, and entrusted Xiang Bo to take care of himself at the Hongmen banquet. Sure enough, when "Xiang Zhuang danced the sword with the intention of Pei Gong", Xiang Bo "also drew his sword and danced, often shielding Pei Gong with his wings", and finally resolved Liu Bang's life worries.
3. After obtaining the "verbal commitment", immediately turn it into a "written commitment" and obtain the evidence
When we are lucky enough to get a verbal commitment from the other party, don't take it lightly, but convert it into a written commitment (or agreement contract) as soon as possible, and obtain relevant evidence. Because of the fact that the thing is regretted, it is not uncommon in the business world and the workplace. If you are unprepared for this, then you will not be able to complain about others "going back on your word".
Speaking of other people's "verbal promises" can be more binding (and even have a certain legal effect in some cases) when put into words, and can make the other party pay more attention to their own commitments. In the specific operation, it is necessary to ensure that the content is clear and unambiguous, including the specific content of the service, the time node, the division of responsibilities, etc. Of course, these operations should appear natural, not too deliberate and harsh, which will be self-defeating. In ancient warfare, this was how the "Order to Establish a Legion" was operated. As mentioned earlier, in the case of "straw boats borrowing arrows", Zhou Yu once induced Zhuge Liang to sign a "military order" and make 100,000 arrows within three days.
In addition to this, obtaining various valid documents is also a very important step. The specific forms are varied, such as documents signed by the other party, email replies, chat records, etc. These credentials may play a key role in ensuring that the other party fulfills their commitments and cannot be repudiated.
4. Publicize it and seek more witnesses
It is also an effective strategy to skillfully publicize the things entrusted to others in order to seek the testimony of more people. Publicizing the other party's deeds can increase the sense of responsibility and pressure on the other party to "fulfill the contract". When others find out about it, they will be more motivated to keep their promises so as not to lose credibility in front of others.
We can do this by mentioning it in our shared social circles, or by showing our gratitude and anticipation of each other on appropriate occasions. However, we must pay attention to ways and means, and avoid causing excessive pressure on the other party or arousing the other party's disgust, so as not to "add to the snake".
A typical case is the story of Guan Yu riding alone for thousands of miles. If Guan Yu didn't make Cao Cao's promise to him "known to the world", then how could Cao Cao let him "pass five levels and kill six generals".
All in all, improving the success rate of "entrusting people to do things" requires us to use our brains and use a variety of strategic skills. Finding the "unavoidable" reason, finding the "unavoidable" opportunity, turning the verbal commitment into a written commitment, and publicizing it publicly, these four operations work together, so that we can greatly improve the success rate of our entrusted work. Of course, in this process, we must always be sincere and respectful, and do not overuse strategic techniques to make a bad impression. After all, good interpersonal relationships are the foundation of successful trusting people.