1. The white-haired Kou Shixun stared at the trajectory of his life at the end of his life
In the last moments of his existence, 69-year-old Kou Shixun was on the hospital bed, his breath getting weaker and weaker. Already aware of the end of human nature, he began to gradually recall the ups and downs of his life.
However, the hard work of his life was finally like the water that passed away, never to return. Kou Shixun couldn't help but recall the decision that made him heartbroken - to marry actress Xu Lidan, who was 33 years younger than him, as his concubine.
In order to accommodate the two women, he had to move into the villa, placing his wife and sister-in-law on the second and third floors respectively. The betrayal of her husband undoubtedly brought endless strife and pain to the originally warm family.
Since then, Kou Shixun has been mired in an abyss of guilt and remorse. In order to support his family, he could only struggle between sets; In order to balance the two women, he had to be distracted from his career and taking care of his children.
To make matters worse, his wife, Cui Yaoqi, and his children are becoming increasingly cold towards him.
Now, at the last moment of his life, Kou Shixun's heart is full of endless regrets. He longed for the opportunity to choose again, and would never make the same ridiculous decision again. However, time cannot be reversed, and what is missed has been missed after all.
He closed his eyes, tears quietly slid down his cheeks, and from then on yin and yang separated.
Second, the sweet first love of youth
Kou Shixun and Cui Yaoqi's affection can be traced back to their childhood. Both grew up in Taichung City, Taiwan, and lived in adjacent alleys, and they have been inseparable since childhood.
In his childhood, Kou Shixun had a typical "little boy" personality - naughty and active, and liked to play tricks on others. And Cui Yaoqi often becomes the object of his naughtiness. He might quietly tug at her braids or smear ink on her hands, always trying to find a way to make her angry.
"It's annoying! You nasty! Cui Yaoqi's angry appearance made Kou Shixun even more happy. In fact, deep down in his heart, he had long been deeply in love with this lively and lovely girl.
After entering his youth, Kou Shixun's admiration for Cui Yaoqi became stronger and stronger. He began to attract her attention in more mature ways, such as sending her postcards, giving small gifts, and so on.
Although Cui Yaoqi still ignores him on the surface, she is secretly happy in her heart.
The emotions between the two gradually heated up and fermented inadvertently. It wasn't until he stepped into the university campus that Kou Shixun decided to overcome his inner tension and decisively express his love to Cui Yaoqi, who he had loved for a long time.
He said affectionately: "The immature boy who used to be has grown into a mature man, and now I really love you" Cui Yaoqi blushed and nodded lightly, since then the two have officially established a relationship Kou Shixun cares for her meticulously, for fear that she will be attracted to other members of the opposite sex Whenever Cui Yaoqi has doubts in his heart, he always sincerely comforts: "I will always love you alone, this will not swerving!" ”
In college, their love moved forward steadily in mutual support. After graduation, Kou Shixun was successfully admitted to the TV station and became an actor, while Cui Yaoqi wholeheartedly supported his career and was willing to be a virtuous wife.
In 1982, amid the warm congratulations of relatives and friends, they entered the marriage hall, and the sweet happiness of the wedding night seemed to overflow from the screen.
However, the good days were short-lived. Soon after marriage, Kou Shixun was deeply attracted to the young and beautiful actress Xu Lidan at a work. At first, Ko tried to resist the fiery emotional temptation.
After all, he already has his beloved wife Cui Yaoqi and two lively and lovely children, living a happy and happy life, however, Xu Lidan is like a tempting sweet poison, constantly teasing him with his passionate pursuit and charming charm.
As time passed, Ko became estranged from his family and became less concerned about his wife and children. Cui Yaoqi was sensitively aware of this change, but she chose to hold back, just silently bearing the anxiety and pain in her heart.
Until one day, Kou Shixun actually took Xu Lidan back to his home, and in front of Cui Yaoqi, he made a ridiculous request to live with them without guilt, "If you can't accept Li Dan to spend the rest of your life with us, then let's divorce" Kou Shixun said firmly.
Faced with this sudden change, Cui Yaoqi was stunned. She never expected her husband to make such a decisive decision. However, after much consideration, she realizes that she has given too much to the family, and now that she is no longer young, she really does not have the courage to start over.
More crucially, the children also need a complete family.
After a difficult emotional struggle, Cui Yaoqi finally reluctantly agreed to her husband's request, but she put forward a crucial rule - the family's financial power must be fully controlled by herself.
In this way, this seemingly absurd "monogamy" family form has taken shape with an irreversible momentum, and Kou Shixun tried to divide all expenses equally between the two important partners - Cui Yaoqi and the third person Xu Lidan who opened the prelude, with a fair and selfless heart, trying to find a peaceful and beautiful status quo.
Fourth, the bitterness and suffering of two-sided life
When his acting career climbed to the pinnacle of glory, Kou Shixun's wealth accumulation gradually became richer. With his superb acting skills and dedication to professionalism, he has successfully created many classic roles that are deeply rooted in the hearts of the people, such as "Pure Love", "A Cut of Plums", "Last Night's Stars", etc., which have won many professional awards in the industry and received warm praise from the audience.
However, the prosperity of the career did not lead to the harmony of family life. Cui Yaoqi, the former virtuous helper, was his most solid support and source of motivation, but since Xu Lidan joined the family, Kou Shixun has devoted most of his efforts and energy to how to maintain the delicate relationship between these two women.
With the passage of time, the status of the original Cui Yaoqi in his heart was gradually marginalized, and it was replaced by the figure of the new love Xu Lidan. At the same time, household expenses have risen sharply due to population growth, and in order to make ends meet, Ko has to travel from studio to studio day after day, doing his best to earn an income.
He thought that as long as he had enough wealth, he would be able to resolve all disputes and troubles. However, the reality is not so simple. The relationship between the three of them became increasingly tense and awkward, and the dissatisfaction of his wife Cui Yaoqi and the children with him gradually grew.
Kou Shixun felt deep remorse and guilt, and he would rather return to the simple and warm time of the past than endure the glamorous but empty affluent life of the present.
Career success made him famous, but inner conflicts kept him awake at night. Kou Shixun lives a life like walking on thin ice, as if walking on a tightrope as thin as a gossamer, and if he stumbles, he may fall into the endless abyss.
This way of life obviously cannot be sustained for long, and he must face the reality bravely and seek a change so as not to lose everything.
5. Guilt and remorse for getting into trouble
Although Kou Shixun tried to allocate considerable time and resources between Cui Yaoqi and Xu Lidan, disputes and disagreements between the two women still inevitably occurred.
One night, Kou Shixun woke up to a noise outside the bedroom, and in a trance, he walked out of the door and was greeted by a messy picture - Cui Yaoqi and Xu Lidan were scuffling, with fierce words and rough movements.
Seeing the scene in front of him, Kou Shixun's heart was filled with endless remorse. Wasn't that the last thing he wanted to see in the first place? For the sake of short-term selfish desires, he not only betrayed his wife's trust, but also destroyed the originally harmonious and happy family with his own hands, making Cui Yaoqi suffer such a huge humiliation.
However, what pained him the most was that the culprit of all this turned out to be himself!
Kou Shixun felt deep remorse and remorse. As a man, he should have done his best to protect his family, rather than pushing it into the abyss with his own hands.
But now, everything is irreparable, and even if he learns from the pain, he is powerless to change the status quo.
Since then, Kou Shixun has been in a difficult situation. In order to support his family life, he had to run around from crew to crew; In order to maintain the balance between the two women, he had to spend a lot of energy and gradually neglected to care about his children and career.
To make matters worse, his wife and children, who were once close, are now drifting away from him.
As he entered old age, Kou Shixun finally began to reflect on his life journey. If you want to ask him what the biggest regret in this life is, it is undoubtedly the ridiculous decision back then, which not only destroyed his career and family, but also deeply hurt the person he loves most in his life.