In the spring of 1990, I was working in a textile factory in a small town in Jiangnan. The roar of the machines in the factory drowned out almost all the subtle sounds, and nothing seemed to be heard except the loneliness of the heart and the confusion about the future. The repetitive work every day makes my life like a screw on a machine, without change.
It wasn't until she came that she brought a different touch of color to my world. Her name is Lin Qing, and she is the kind of girl who can be recognized at a glance in the crowd, not only because of her beauty, but also because of her indescribable freshness and refinement. Lin Qing has long hair that is always simply tied behind her head, her eyes are clear, and her smile is as bright as a cherry blossom in spring.
Her arrival made the originally peaceful factory life begin to ripple. I noticed that whenever the bell rang for the end of work, she always sat quietly by the window by herself, looking at the slowly darkening sky outside the window, as if thinking about something. I often find an excuse to walk over and try to have a few words with her, even if it's just about today's work or tomorrow's weather.
It wasn't until that night that she knocked on my dorm door for the first time. It was a sunny evening, and the lights in the factory were dappled on the narrow corridors. I was sitting on my bed reading a book when I heard a knock on the door, and the gentle knocking took me by surprise. When I opened the door, I saw Lin Qing's face that looked particularly soft in the night.
"Can I come in and sit down for a while?" Her voice trembled a little, I had never seen her like this.
I nodded, feeling indescribable. She walked in and sat across from me, and the two of them sat quietly like this, outside the factory night, inside our silence.
"Aren't you afraid of being out there alone?" I asked tentatively.
She smiled slightly, and at that moment, I seemed to see the cherry blossoms bloom again in spring.
"Sometimes people scare me more than the night." She lowered her head and whispered.
That night, we didn't have many words, but we had a wonderful sense of security. I know that something has quietly changed since this night.
Since that night, Lin Qing has occasionally come to my room in the dead of night. At first, we all kept a cautious distance, and the conversation was limited to work and the weather. However, as time went on, we started sharing more stories about ourselves.
Lin Qing comes from a small village, her family is not wealthy, her father died at an early age, and her mother raised her alone. She told me that she came to work in the textile factory to earn money to pay for her education, and that she had always dreamed of being able to get out of town and see the outside world. "I always felt that the outside world must be much wider than the sky in this town." Lin Qing said, his eyes flashing with longing for the future.
I also confessed a lot of things about myself to her. I was born in this small town and worked in a textile factory with my parents from a young age. Although life is uneventful, there is always a force within me that drives me to pursue something different. I have a hobby of writing poetry, and in the dead of night, I write some small poems about factory life, which is my only spiritual sustenance.
Gradually, a unique trust and understanding was built between us. In those days, this closeness between men and women often attracted criticism from others, but we ignored it. For us, it is already a precious thing to be able to find someone to talk to.
Time passed like this, and our relationship became deeper and deeper. Until one day, Lin Qing suddenly told me that she was pregnant. We were all shocked by the sudden news. Her eyes were filled with panic, "I don't know what to do, I can't let this kid affect your future." ”
I had mixed feelings in my mind, but more of a concern for her. I know that in those days, getting pregnant out of wedlock was a very serious thing. I tried to comfort her and tell her that no matter what, I would support her and would not leave her to face it all alone.
In the months following that, Lin Qing decided to hide the fact of her pregnancy, and she began to wear loose clothes to try to avoid attracting attention from others. I did my best to take care of her and secretly sent her some nutritious food every night. It's like we're guarding a little secret together, and this secret makes our relationship even deeper.
However, the good times did not last long, and Lin Qing's physical condition began to get worse and worse. She often felt tired and nauseous, and on several occasions even fainted while working. This worries me a lot, I know we can't hide it anymore, but at the same time I'm afraid that if it comes to light, it will have unimaginable consequences for her.
In a late-night conversation, Lin Qing said to me with tears in her eyes: "I don't want to be a burden to you, and I don't want this child to become a shackle to our love." Maybe I should leave and go to a place where no one knows me. "Hearing this, my heart was twisted, and I couldn't imagine what life would be like without her.
Eventually, after a long period of thinking and painful struggles, we made a difficult decision. Lin Qing decided to leave the textile factory and live in a distant city until the birth of her child. I said yes, and despite the reluctance in my heart, I knew it was the best way to protect her and the child.
In the days after Lin Qing left, the factory and the town seemed to me to have lost the color of life. I mechanically repeat my work every day, but my heart is always thinking about her and her children's safety. Although we agreed not to contact each other again to avoid causing trouble to each other, I could not suppress my thoughts and worries about her.
At that time, I began to write poems more frequently, trying to express my inner struggles and pains through words. My poems are full of thoughts about Lin Qing, as well as confusion and anxiety about the future. In the dead of night, I would look through the letters she had given me, and the tenderness and strength implied between those words always comforted my soul temporarily.
Two years passed quickly, and I finally made up my mind to leave this oppressive environment and go in search of Lin Qing and my children. I quit my job at the factory and set out on a journey to find them, with some savings and uncertainty about the future.
Arriving at the city she had said she might go, I began a long and uncertain search. I traveled to every corner of the city, asking everyone who might know Lin Qing. The process was fraught with frustration and helplessness, and many times I felt hopeless, as if she had completely disappeared from my life like a gust of wind.
Just when I was about to give up, by chance, I learned about Lin Qing from the owner of a small bookstore. The boss said that there was a girl named Lin Qing who often came here to buy books, and she always brought a little boy, the child was about two years old, and it was very cute. Hearing this, my heart jumped and that long-lost hope was rekindled.
I started waiting around the bookstore, hoping to meet Lin Qing and the child. Finally, on a sunny afternoon, I saw her, and the little boy. Although Lin Qing looked a little haggard than two years ago, her eyes were still firm and gentle. She was visibly shocked at the sight of me, followed by an incredibly joyful moment.
We met again in a corner of the bookstore and hugged each other tightly. At that moment, all the uneasiness, worry, and loneliness seemed to dissipate at this moment. Lin Qing told me with a choked up that she had been working hard for the past two years while taking care of her children, and that she had never regretted her choice despite the difficult life.
The child, this little life, looks a little shy, but his eyes are clear and bright, just like Lin Qing. I crouched down and greeted him gently. Although the child was unfamiliar at first sight, he soon showed a smile in our banter and gentleness.
Lin Qing and I found a quiet place and talked in detail about the past two years. She told me that she had been waiting for the right moment to give her child a complete home. Hearing this, my heart was filled with mixed emotions, but more than that, it was admiration and love for her.
After much deliberation, we decided not to separate again. No matter how difficult the road ahead may be, we are willing to face it together. We plan to go back to my hometown because there are my relatives and friends there and we can get more support and help.
On the way back to our hometown, Lin Qing and I kept holding hands, and the children danced happily among us. Although there are still many unknowns on the road ahead, we have the courage and confidence to face everything.
After returning to my hometown, my life with Lin Qing gradually got on the right track. We found a stable job and our children started attending a local kindergarten. Despite the many difficulties and challenges in life, with each other's company and support, everything seems to become bearable.
Our story spread in the town, and although we were met with some criticism and scrimson at first, as time went on, people began to accept us as a small family. My parents were very fond of the child, and they often took him to play in the surrounding mountains and taught him about various trees and flowers. The innocence and happiness of children gradually infected everyone, and my home became a place where everyone likes to gather.
Lin Qing also found her direction, and she started working at a local library, having more time and opportunities to read and learn. Her life no longer revolves around family and children, she is beginning to have her own little world. Looking at her energy and smile every day, I know she has rediscovered her dreams and passions.
Over time, we have learned how to understand and respect each other better. Our relationship is also becoming stronger and stronger, and the growth of our children has brought us endless joy and hope. We know that although there may be more uncertainties and challenges ahead, nothing is impossible as long as we are together as a family.
Ultimately, this story is not just a story of love and family, it is a lesson in courage, perseverance, and responsibility. Through our experiences, I hope to convey a message: no matter where life takes us, no matter how difficult we face, as long as we have the courage to face the truth and are determined to preserve love and family, there is always a glimmer of hope waiting for us.